We Go Down
by JLaLa
Summary: Seventeen-year-old Prim moves in with Peeta Mellark, the brother that she never knew she had—and Katniss Everdeen, the pregnant girl, who lives with him. Cover art by barenakedpeeta.
1. Chapter One: The Reunion

Welcome to my newest fic: a very interesting dramedy—I think.

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

_Love, we go down, we go down  
>Breathe, it's over now, over now<br>We can love, we can love  
>And the birds will sing our song in Halcyon…<em>

_ -Paper Kites "Halcyon"_

We Go Down

_**Chapter One: The Reunion**_

"Is this your first time on a plane?"

Primrose turned shakily to the woman sitting next to her.

She gave the woman a short smile. "Does it look that obvious?"

"It's been a five hour flight—and you've been gripping your armrest for four of the hours," the woman replied. She peeked at Prim behind her thick glasses and smiled, the corners of her wise eyes crinkling. "I figured that you were a first-timer."

Prim nodded, taking a sharp inhale when the plane jostled as it began its descent.

"First time for a lot of things, I guess," Prim added. "I've never been anywhere."

"So what brings you over to the West Coast?" the woman inquired. "You're such a young girl to be traveling for work."

"I'm meeting my brother," Primrose told her. "For the first time."

* * *

><p>Those words had shut the woman right up.<p>

As soon as the passengers all made their way out to the plane corridor and onto the solid ground of the airport, the woman had not given Prim a second glance. Instead, she had lost herself in the rushing crowd of people in the airport.

Prim looked around nervously; she was never good with crowds.

She gripped her single suitcase and looked up at the signs to find baggage claim. Her brother's instructions had been simple and straightforward; he would find her because her foster parents had sent him her picture.

She had to remember to thank Rue's parents for being that considerate.

Prim had been waiting for this her whole life—to feel like she belonged with someone. To finally understand where her hair, her eyes, and her soft voice came from; these things seem so trivial to people.

But, they were not trivial—especially when you have been shuffled from one place to another as she had.

And, especially when you're lying in bed and staring at your hands, wondering where your long fingers came from. Prim would wonder if her parents had been musicians as she stared at her pair. Her spindly hands seemed to be made for playing the piano—and she had tried once. However, she had no ear for music and had failed miserably at her attempt.

No musical talent—another trait to add to the rest of her unknowns.

An elevator ride down and Prim found herself in the baggage area. There were a series of baggage carousels and she went to 12—the carousel for her flight from Virginia. The older woman who sat next to her was long gone—probably telling her family about the funny little blonde who was scared of flying and had no idea about her brother.

How would she know who he was? His e-mail was brief—and she could tell that he was curt just through his punctuation: _Wait at the carousel for your flight. I will find you. –Peeta_

Around her, families were reuniting—hugging, kissing, crying.

Wasn't she supposed to be feeling some sort of buzz of anticipation or excitement at the thought of their reunion?

However, Prim felt nothing; just emptiness.

Then, he was there.

She turned in time as the crowd parted to find Peeta walking hurriedly towards her carousel.

When their eyes met, he slowed and Prim took a deep breath to meet him in the middle of the long alleyway. He was medium-height, broad, with thick dirty-blond hair and solemn blue eyes.

He was still wearing his work clothes—the emblem saying 'Panem Bakery' in thick red cursive on the breast pocket of his white button down and the worn black pants looking like the pair had seen better days.

Then her eyes zeroed at a site that made her chest pound—his hands.

They were just like hers.

* * *

><p>Her eyes opened at a sudden jostle and she turned to see that they were driving down a darkened street.<p>

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked her brother.

Brother—the word sounded fucking weird.

"Since we've been on the road—about thirty minutes," Peeta replied before going quiet again.

In only a matter of seconds, Prim has learned that her brother was not much of a talker.

But, neither was she.

Peeta continued another block before parking in front of a tall, compact Victorian. It had been white once—but was now caked with dirt that accumulated over the years. A tall black gate guarded an overgrown front yard, blocking the bay windows of the bottom floor of the two-story.

Prim stepped out of the Honda Civic that Peeta drove and looked up at the house.

So, this was her family home.

"I've been meaning to clean up," Peeta suddenly said as he appeared next to her. He spoke so little that she almost jumped hearing his voice. "I've just been busy—"

"It's fine," she interrupted as he pried open the gate. "Do we have tenants?"

Peeta shook his head. They walked down the brick-lined path leading to a wooden porch and he took his keys out to open the door.

"This was Mom's family home—so we own the whole building," he explained to her. Unlocking the door, Peeta pushed it open. "We use the downstairs as storage mostly."

Prim looked to him. "We?"

Peeta turned to her abruptly, his eyes flashing for a moment. "I mean—me. It's still hard to remember that Mom is not around anymore."

She could see that he was in pain but Prim could find no empathy. She couldn't miss someone that she never knew.

Instead, Prim remained silent as they walked up the wooden steps of the house. There was a faint smell of aging wood and dust balls. Other than that, the house and its occupants had no life.

They went down a long hallway after rounding the staircase and Peeta brought her to the end of the hallway.

"This is your room," he explained before opening the door. "It's supposed to be the living room but at least you get a view of the street."

Turning the knob, Peeta led her inside a large room with high ceilings. A bay window stood to her left while the adjoining wall had the fireplace. To her left was the bed; a simple full-sized mattress with white sheets.

"It's not much," he told her as he placed her suitcase next to the closet door near her bed. "But you can do whatever you want and stuff. I painted a little bit and even had a phone line and internet set-up—"

There was a distinct thud that sounded through the house and her eyes went to Peeta's.

"House sounds," he told her and she knew better than to press him.

Going to the window, Prim looked out at the empty street before lifting the latch to open it. There was the faraway sound of sirens and the smell of pot drifting from one of the houses. They were all so closely connected together that Prim couldn't point out where it came from.

"You should sleep," he told her. Prim found him already at the doorway, eager to leave. "The bathroom is the door next to you and my room is the door across. If you need anything, knock and I'll come down."

Prim nodded and mustered what she could of a smile. "Thanks."

His ocean eyes were unreadable; Peeta returned her nod as he went to close her door.

"Peeta?" He stopped half-way of closing the door. "What's our last name?"

Her brother peered at her. Prim had failed to tell him that Child Protective Services had only told her that there was a DNA match and that he had petitioned for her.

She did not hesitate to accept.

"It's Mellark," Peeta told her after a moment.

She went back to looking out the window, only turning when she heard the door close and the sound of her brother climbing up the stairs to his room.

* * *

><p>Prim awoke to her walls vibrating around her.<p>

In the light, her new room looked older than it did last night. However, it was bright due to the many windows and Peeta had attempted to clean her room to the best of his ability. It wasn't necessarily her brother's fault that the walls were falling apart around the old house.

Getting up, Prim went to the bay windows and looked out. Their house was on a side street and seemed relatively undisturbed except for the two Latino men fixing their low-rider across the street. The music coming through her room was blaring out from their open garage.

Her stomach began to rumble; so quietly she opened her door and went into the long empty hallway to search for the kitchen. Her brother's door was still closed so she assumed that Peeta was asleep.

Walking down the hall, she could see that her new home was a series of blank walls and shut doors. The kitchen was at the end of the hall—the only open door on the floor.

Stepping into the kitchen, Prim was surprised to see that the room wasn't empty. There, sitting at the table was a dark-haired girl about her age. She was eating a bowl of cereal at a rapid pace, her long thick braid almost brushing into the bowl as she inhaled her breakfast.

The girl looked up; her sharp, steel eyes meeting Prim's perplexed blues.

"Sit." The girl placed the box in the middle of the table. "Eat. Bowls are in the cupboard above the sink."

Unsurely, Prim followed the girl's instructions. Taking the bowl to the table, she poured cereal into her bowl as she watched the girl continue her rapid eating.

Peeta shuffled into the kitchen, mussed hair and sleepy blue eyes.

"Morning," he grumbled as he went to the counter and turned on the coffee maker. Peeta nodded at Prim then ruffled the top of the girl's head giving her a brief smile as their eyes met.

She felt that twinge of jealousy at the obvious connection between the two. Was it really necessary that her brother let his girlfriend sleep over the first night of her arrival?

"So, um…what the hell is going on?" Prim suddenly asked in irritation.

Peeta and the girl looked at one another before looking back at her.

The girl gave her a smile. "Let me get you some milk."

Quickly, she stood up and Prim almost choked. The girl was pregnant.

Not just pregnant—_really _pregnant.

"OH MY GOD!" Prim looked to her brother. "Who is this?"

"Shit," the girl breathed out and looked over at Peeta apologetically. "I didn't introduce myself—pregnancy brain." She shook her head in confusion before giving Prim another easy smile. "Katniss. Katniss Everdeen."

"Okay, Katniss," Prim said carefully as she let out a breath. "So, you're Peeta's…fiancée?"

Katniss laughed as Prim's brother snorted into the coffee cup that he was drinking from.

"Oh God—no!" Katniss looked over at her as she went to the fridge to retrieve the milk. "I'm not even old enough to get married."

"How old are you?" Prim asked, her brows raised.

Katniss couldn't be any older than eighteen.

"Sixteen. But, I'll be seventeen by the time the baby comes," Katniss replied as she placed the milk on the table.

Crap. Her brother was going to jail.

Prim looked to Peeta. "She's a year younger than me!" she told him. "Your girlfriend is a year younger than me!"

"I'm not his girlfriend," Katniss stated as Peeta nodded in agreement.

"Friend?" Prim continued. "Is she a friend of yours?"

"We talked once or twice," Peeta said in a low voice. "Before…" He took another sip of coffee to end his statement.

Prim felt the room begin to spin. "Do you two even like each other?"

The 'couple'—or whatever they were—looked to one another once more.

Katniss moved her head from one side to another. "Ehh…"

Peeta continued drinking his coffee in silence, ignoring her question.

Thus began Prim's first day in her new home.

* * *

><p>"You don't like me," Katniss stated as they walked down the block from their house.<p>

Prim turned to look at her. They were about the same height and she could deduce that at one point, Katniss had a very slim figure. The mother of her brother's child—such a long title—was wearing a sleeveless cobalt maxi-dress exposing her toned, tanned arms.

"I don't know you," Prim replied before facing forward.

"You think that I've stolen your brother," Katniss continued, her hand on her protruding belly. "I'm nothing, really."

She said it so flippantly that Prim couldn't help but meet her eyes once more.

There was something very sad about Katniss. It wasn't the fact that she was facing impending motherhood. Or that instead of applying for colleges; she had settled for becoming a statistic.

There was a pall over the girl. It was as if at any moment, Katniss just might break.

Prim wasn't sure what would happen to any of them if she did.

Since she arrived two days ago, Katniss had become the buffer between her and Peeta. In that aspect, Prim was grateful. However, it didn't get her any closer to knowing about where she came from. Or, why she had been abandoned.

And the more that Prim thought about it, the more frequent her nightmares became.

In turn, the more pills she had to take.

"When's the baby due?" Prim abruptly asked.

Katniss looked down at her stomach, a slight smile on her lips. "Two weeks. You're just in time, Aunt Prim."

She shook off the impending anxiety of becoming an Aunt. She didn't even know how to be a sister.

"And, how did that happen—you and my brother?"

They had reached a small park at the end of their block and Katniss went to a bench to sit down, tired from their short walk.

Prim joined her, eager to understand and unwilling to settle for silence. Her brother refused to talk—having to rush to work in the mornings. From what Katniss had explained, he did bread deliveries to local groceries and markets for Panem bakery.

In the evenings, Peeta was mostly silent, only making slight grunts of agreement when Katniss would talk to either of them.

"There will be a time and a place for all of that to be explained," Katniss replied as her hand caressed her belly affectionately. "You're just getting used to your life here. Give yourself time." She smiled at Prim and though Katniss was only sixteen, her eyes displayed someone much older lurking internally.

Prim couldn't help but feel a sudden rush of affection for her. Katniss reminded her of Rue, her foster sister, who she missed like crazy. She still wasn't used to not hearing her best friend's light snores since they had shared a room in Virginia.

"Are you in love with him?" Prim asked.

"We can hardly love ourselves sometimes," Katniss told her evenly. "How could we love one another?" She shook her head. "There is no place for those thoughts—especially with little no-name here coming."

Prim was at a standstill. "I don't understand. You can't just make a baby with someone and not have it mean something."

"There are grey areas, Prim," Katniss replied, her voice suddenly tight. "Just another lesson for you to learn."

* * *

><p>First things first, this story won't be updated as frequently as "Tides" because there are actually only ten or so chapters. So, I hope that you will be patient—and follow or favorite this story.<p>

As for this chapter, it's a bit slow starting. I don't mind, really.

While I don't necessarily state it, the Mellark house is located in San Francisco. You might be able to infer the district that it's in—but I'll leave that to you.

I'm sure, like Prim, that you have questions on Katniss and Peeta's relationship. We'll get to them—give it time.

Comments are always welcomed on all platforms (Tumblr, FF, and AO3).

Next, Chapter Two: The Meeting

-JLaLa


	2. Chapter Two: The Meeting

Thank you for all of your support! It's been amazing!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Two: The Meeting**_

"It's been two weeks, Peeta," Katniss said as they sat in bed.

Her hands went over her round belly, feeling the ripple of movement inside of her. Her sixteen-year-old self mourned the thought of never being able to wear another bikini. Her soon-to-be-mother self cherished the thought that she would be holding her child in her arms at any moment.

"You can't ignore Prim," she continued. "She came all this way—for you. She came for family. And you're treating her like a tenant in your house!"

Peeta continued to flip through the baby book. Katniss could tell that he was listening—just by the tilt of his head—though his eyes remained set on the open page.

She felt her irritation rise and before even thinking of the repercussions, her hand reached for the book, throwing it across the bedroom.

It landed with a loud clunk. She hoped that it didn't wake Prim.

Peeta turned to her, removing his reading glasses as he did. His blue eyes were expressionless—which wasn't uncommon when it came to the father of her child. With one hand, Katniss could count the number of times that she had seen any sort of reaction from him.

He was that deadpanned.

"I'm not ignoring her," Peeta explained. "But, what exactly do you talk about with a seventeen-year-old?"

"This isn't just any seventeen-year-old—this is your sister." Katniss could feel her lips begin to tremble, her thoughts on sad Primrose, who always seemed on the brink of tears.

She had been much tougher—pre-baby.

"Tell her about you. Tell her about your parents…or at least say 'good morning' during breakfast. Is that so hard?"

Peeta slowly shook his head, his eyes clouded for a moment. "I'll try." He gave her the tiniest of smiles. "How are you feeling?"

Katniss let out a snort. "Pregnant. I'm ready to get this thing out of me," she informed him, her mouth in a tight line. "The last time I was in the hospital, the sonogram technician kept shooting me dirty looks…"

"It isn't any better when I'm there," Peeta offered, his mouth turned up in a crooked smirk. "It's not exactly pleasant being the twenty-year-old bringing the sixteen-year-old to her pre-natal appointments."

"We're always going to have people look at us," she responded.

Katniss knew how they looked together. She could pass for legal age when she put on liquid eyeliner and left her wavy hair down.

She had even fooled Peeta—that one time.

Now, Katniss had no reason to put makeup on, seeing that she rarely left the house. Also, being pregnant made her warm all the time so she usually plaited her hair to cool herself off.

"I'm aware," Peeta responded curtly. He let out a begrudging sigh. "So, I'm going to try with Prim—but, give me time. Also, don't butt in." Katniss opened her mouth to protest but his firm stare stopped her. "This isn't easy for me. I'm not used to not being alone."

Taking his face in her hands, Katniss brought her lips to his.

Peeta responded immediately—he always did.

Pulling away, she let her mouth rest lightly against his as she spoke, "You were never alone."

* * *

><p>"Why does he stare at me?" Prim asked, two days later.<p>

Katniss placed a pile of onesies on her bed and Prim took one to start folding.

"What do you mean?" Katniss sat down next to her, her hand rubbing her overdue belly.

Since her arrival two weeks ago, Prim had found Katniss to be her Godsend. She had, at first, thought that Katniss was similar to Rue, her best friend and foster sister.

Prim came to realize that they were actually very different. Rue was gentle and easy going. On the opposite end, Katniss was loud and take-charge. From the little that Prim knew of Katniss, she had several brothers and sisters who she had taken care of prior to her living with Peeta.

Because of this, Katniss coddled her—even Peeta. She always made sure that Prim ate enough or that Peeta left with a packed lunch for work. She kept the house like an organized ship and Prim had taken to helping Katniss out with cleaning the place up. It brought them closer together and Prim found herself a little more at ease in her new home.

"He stares," Prim informed her. "At breakfast and at dinner…it's a little—"

"Creepy?" Katniss offered with a slight smile. "I've been trying to get him to say something…_anything_ really—to you. He must be trying to work up to it."

"How did you even conceive a child together?" Prim joked.

Katniss stacked the onesie that Prim folded together. "It's actually a lot easier than you might believe." She looked over at Prim, her grey eyes suddenly solemn. "Prim, it's because you look like your mother."

Prim stilled at her words. "Oh." She handed Katniss another folded onesie. "I wouldn't know."

There were no pictures of her mother on the walls or the shelves of the house. There were no remnants that she even existed or left an imprint on the place. It was almost as if Peeta was unwilling to share their mother—that she was his and his alone.

"It isn't fair, really," Prim suddenly spat.

Katniss seemed to understand her words.

Finally, she sighed and took Prim's hand. "Come with me."

"What—" Prim was pulled off the bed by her friend.

Katniss was surprisingly strong despite carrying an extra twenty pounds in the front.

Together, they went into the hallway and Katniss led her up the stairs to her and Peeta's bedroom. It was the first time that Prim would see their room and she had to admit that she was curious. When they got to the top, Katniss opened the door and together they entered the bedroom.

It was a mishmash of Katniss and Peeta in the large room: a bulletin board with Peeta's work schedule and some sonogram prints, a coffee table with nail polish bottles strewn on it, and a small crib set-up in the alcove. On the far wall was their medium-sized bed with a simple blue comforter and fluffy pillows.

There was a fireplace in the same spot where hers was. Prim went to the mantle where pictures of children in school uniforms stood along with a framed photo of a handsome, dark-haired man.

"My Dad," Katniss informed her when she picked up the frame.

Prim turned to see her at the open closet door standing on a creaky chair before abruptly rushing over to her. "Be careful!"

"Hold this." Katniss handed her a box before stepping off the chair. She led Prim to the small couch next to the closet and Prim placed the box in between them. "Go ahead—open it."

"What is it?" Prim asked carefully.

"Your mother," Katniss replied simply.

Prim felt her heart race as she lifted the lid. Her breath caught in her throat at the photo lying on top of the pile of photos.

Those eyes, round and blue, were her own.

However, they shone with happiness. Her mother's hair was golden and abundantly curly. Prim fingered her own straight, fine locks—her hair was probably from her father. She recalled the slight wave of Peeta's hair and realized that it was the one thing that he distinctly inherited from their mother.

Her mother had a beautiful smile.

"What was her name?" she managed to ask Katniss.

"I think it was Sarah," Katniss said gently. The girl reached forward and took her free hand. "Are you okay?"

Prim nodded though her eyes blurred during the movement. "It's just that I've always wondered—"

"What's going on?"

They looked up to see Peeta at the doorway.

He was not happy.

Katniss immediately went to him, her grey eyes defiant. "I'm showing Prim a picture of your mother. You can't hide her anymore."

"I TOLD YOU TO STAY OUT OF IT!" Peeta put a frustrated hand to his head. "YOU NEVER LISTEN, KATNISS!"

"NEITHER DO YOU!" Katniss bellowed back. She was louder, having spent her time being the speaker of the house. "I TOLD YOU THAT PRIM NEEDS TO KNOW WHO SHE IS AND WHO HER FAMILY IS!"

"Couldn't you just wait?" he argued.

"NO AND NEITHER CAN SHE!" Katniss argued back. "Just because you are uncomfortable, you can't put it off! We are having a child—and I won't have it coming into a broken home! I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF LIVING IN ONE OF THOSE!"

"I SWEAR TO GOD, KATNISS!"

Peeta raised his hand and for a moment, Prim feared that he would hit Katniss.

_Loud, sharp slaps…a screaming woman…someone leading her into a police car…_

Prim shook herself out of the memory to see Katniss and Peeta still in a heated stance.

"You going to hit me, Peeta?" Katniss questioned, her slate eyes glowering at her brother. "You going to hit me while I'm pregnant? You going to hit me in front of your sister?"

Katniss was fearless.

"Fuck this." Peeta turned and rushed out the door. She could hear her brother's pounding steps go down the stairs followed by a slam of a door.

_Pounding steps…a crack of a belt…searing pain on her small behind…_

She had to calm down—before these things became too frequent.

Prim looked up to Katniss tossing things into a small duffle bag. "Where are you going?"

"Out of here…" Katniss fumed as she threw clothes from the open closet into her bag. "…He's a fucking psycho…and I am NOT bringing my child into this…I won't be _her_…" She threw the duffle over her shoulder and walk passed Prim towards the door.

"Katniss—wait!" Prim followed her down the steps and down the hallway. "WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

Somewhere behind her, Prim heard a door open. She knew it was her brother.

Katniss was already down the flight of stairs and yanking the front door open.

"KATNISS!"

Prim ran down the stairs in hot pursuit and through the open front gate to see Katniss walking steadily down the street. The sounds of uneven feet had her turning to meet the eyes of her brother.

"GO AFTER HER!" Prim yelled at him. "SHE'S ALL I HAVE HERE!"

Peeta stared at her for a moment—he almost looked hurt by her words.

However, she could really give a flying fuck about what he thought.

Before Prim could continue, Peeta was already chasing after Katniss.

* * *

><p>Katniss hated him.<p>

She hated his temper. She hated his moodiness. It drove her crazy.

And, she didn't need any more crazy in her life.

Warm tears ran down her cheeks and Katniss faltered for a moment. She could hear Prim yelling her name and her heart hurt thinking that she would be leaving her.

In only a small amount of time, Prim had become her friend—a sister, almost.

Katniss heard the pounding of fast, heavy steps and knew that it was Peeta. He was never very stealthy. When they had first met at the market where she worked, Katniss had always been aware of his movements despite his silence.

His strong arms were already coming up behind her—holding her, embracing her, steadying her.

She struggled against him in anger, desperate to not fall into the comfort that Peeta unknowingly brought her.

However, Peeta held firm; his rapid heartbeats against her spine.

His mouth was to her ear. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry…"

Katniss hated him. She hated him for using so little words to get her to forgive him.

She hated this hold that he had on her.

Letting a small sob escape her mouth, Katniss sank down onto her knees. Peeta followed, arms still around her and his lips against her neck.

"I hate you," she whispered.

"I know," Peeta told her. "I hate me, too." Katniss turned and met his blazing blue eyes. He gave her a small smile. "Come home?"

Katniss sighed resignedly as he helped her up. "Prim would miss me."

She barely caught his quiet words, "She wouldn't be the only one."

That's when the sudden trickle of water hit her shoes.

* * *

><p>Prim awoke to a warm hand shaking her shoulder. She started, her eyes zeroing in on her brother, who was leaning in front of her seated form.<p>

For a moment, she was confused at the yellowed walls and plastic chairs around her.

_Furious scribbling on a questionnaire…Rue's worried eyes…a nurse calling her name…_

"Good morning," Peeta greeted her hoarsely. She could see that he had been up all night. A shadow of a beard had grown on his face and there were dull circles under his blood-shot blue eyes.

"Katniss," she said instead of replying to his greeting. "Is she okay?"

Peeta nodded in affirmation, a wisp of a smile on his face. "She did a good amount of screaming, socked me in the arm twice, and threw a cup of ice chips at a nurse. She wants to see you."

Standing up, Prim straightened herself and followed Peeta as they went down the hallway. They were in a general hospital, so there was no maternity ward and Katniss was in a regular hospital room. She looked into an open door where a man was sitting on his bed with an open gown and a wrapped head.

He gave her a wink—and she rushed forward to catch up to her brother.

"Katniss has a private room—thank goodness," Peeta told her as they stopped in front of a wide door. "I almost killed an orderly for putting her next to a gunshot patient."

This was the most that he had spoken to her in two and a half weeks.

Quietly, Peeta pushed open the door for Prim and she walked into the room.

The blinds were halfway closed, leaving the room with only a bit of morning light pouring in. Katniss was asleep, her face pale and her hair slightly frizzing along her shoulders. Next to her bed was the small glass crib where a bundle in white slept, a clothed cap on its thick, dark tresses.

"Sarah." Prim looked up to see Katniss smiling at her, a slight yawn on her tired lips. "She's cute, isn't she? It sucked getting her out of me."

"Yeah…" She gazed down at the tiny wrapped baby; her heart leaping in fear and excitement when the baby stirred. "So you named her after—"

"Yes, I named after your mother," Katniss replied as she looked over at Peeta, who stood at the foot of her bed watching her. She gave him a slight smile as their eyes met. "Does that bother you?"

He shook his head before rounding Katniss' bed and kissing her forehead.

Prim's eyes were still trained on the newborn that was now awake and trying to focus on Prim's stare. The baby squirmed as an arm escaped its bundling and a whine escaped her full rose lips.

"Oh!" Her arms instinctively reached to pick Sarah up. The baby squirmed and Prim adjusted her niece until she was cradled safely against her chest. "There you go…all comfy…"

"You're a natural, Aunt Prim," Katniss remarked. "It's like you've done this before."

Prim felt her insides freeze.

No, she had never held a baby before.

She had almost lost the chance to ever hold a baby.

"This baby just happens to like me," Prim replied as she walked to the window. She looked over to where Katniss and Peeta sat on her bed; their foreheads pressed together as they talked quietly.

It was hard to think that the smiling couple—or whatever they were—were at the brink of implosion just hours ago.

Prim looked down at Sarah, who was asleep.

Babies change everything, she guessed.

Was it possible to love anyone so quickly? Sarah, with her dark hair and slightly blue eyes, had tattooed herself inside whatever was left of Prim's battered heart.

Because babies love unconditionally—they don't see darkness in anyone. They don't look at you like you don't belong and they're never cruel.

They don't make you want to die.

They make you see why you're living.

"I don't have a lot of memories of you."

Prim looked up to see Peeta in front of her, his cerulean eyes staring into her own. She never realized that they shared the same eye shape.

"But I remember the first time I saw you. Mom was holding you in her arms and her smile—it looked just like yours."

* * *

><p>"<em>Guantanamera, guajira Guantanamera…"<em>

Prim opened her eyes to the sound of the song blaring into her bedroom.

Slowly, she sat up and went to open her window to let the music in. Her eyes went to the two men fixing their car in their open garage where the song came from.

One of the men caught her stare and gave her a slight nod. She nodded in response before heading back to her bed to catch some more sleep.

Something stopped her in her tracks.

On her side table stood a framed photo—the photo of her mother.

And, somehow Prim knew that it was her brother who had put it there.

* * *

><p>Because this chapter is so short—I have updated sooner than I thought. But, the next one will take awhile.<p>

Thank you so much for your follows, favorites, kudos, etc. Also, if you're on Tumblr, thanks for the following me!

I hope that you've enjoyed this chapter—please feel free to leave a little something, something. This is an idea that I've been working on for a while so I would love to hear from my readers.

And, it probably did not help at all in understanding Katniss and Peeta's relationship nor Peeta and Prim's—but he is trying.

The next chapter is very baby-centric as everyone will be adjusting to the newest addition.

We will also be meeting Katniss' brother—wink, wink.

"Guantanamera" is sung by Celia Cruz.

Chapter Three: The Family

Until then, JLaLa


	3. Chapter Three: The Family

Thank you so much for your support with this story!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Three: The Family**_

The cry was loud and shrill, filling the crevices of the run-down house and waking him up quickly.

Peeta sat up to find Katniss by Sarah's crib; their two-week-old daughter cradled against her milk-filled chest.

She met his eyes worriedly. "It's not Sarah."

Peeta got out of bed and went to her. In the moonlight, Katniss glowed bright with motherhood. She was beautiful—serenity incarnate.

Why she had chosen him when there were others was always beyond Peeta.

He kissed Sarah's smooth forehead before looking to Katniss again.

"This has been happening a lot lately," he recalled.

"I shouldn't be the only one going down there, Peeta," Katniss told him. "She needs you, too."

Nodding, he brushed his lips against Katniss' and she looked surprised at the action.

"Get some rest." Peeta went to the door and slipped out to head down the stairs.

Prim was still a mystery and he could not blame her for her reticence towards him. He was not the easiest person to know or understand. At times, he could barely understand himself or why he did half the things he did.

The one person who had managed to break a little piece of him was upstairs rocking their baby to sleep.

Taking a deep breath, Peeta knocked on Prim's door before opening it. She was whimpering to herself, still stuck in-between sleep and nightmare.

"Prim?" he called in the dimness of the room. "Are you okay?"

Her response came out in-between choked sobs, "Just a dream."

There was a pregnant pause. He hated these gaps of awkward quietness that often happened and he cursed himself for not knowing how to fix himself, fix her, or fix the pain that Prim was obviously feeling.

Peeta sat on the edge of her bed and she instinctively wrapped herself tighter in her covers.

His eyes went to her thin sheets—he would have to remember to buy her a thicker blanket.

"Did you want to tell me about your dream?" he asked after a long moment.

Prim shook her head vehemently, her face still wrapped in her blanket. "N-n-no."

"Okay." Another strange pause between the siblings.

Obviously, he would not be winning any brother-of-the-year awards.

"Peeta?" came the quiet call.

"Yeah?"

"Can you stay?" Prim asked, her voice still trembling in the remnants of her nightmare. "Until I fall asleep?"

"Sure."

Peeta had no idea how to bring comfort, or show affection.

But, he knew how to stay.

So, that's what he did—until the sun came up and Prim's breathing evened out.

* * *

><p>Prim shuffled into the kitchen during the latter part of the morning. Katniss and Peeta were already awake. Sarah's bassinet was set up and placed next to Katniss' chair.<p>

"Morning," she greeted them hoarsely. "I'm sorry if I woke you both up last night."

Her eyes went to Peeta who was standing by the coffee maker as he usually did. He seemed unperturbed by the fact that he spent most of his night sitting at the corner of her bed until she fell back into a dreamless sleep.

Katniss gave her a wan smile. "It's fine, doll."

Prim peeked inside the bassinet at Sarah, who was staring up at her silently. Her eyes had developed into a similar color of blue to Prim's which she secretly rejoiced in.

For so long, Prim had longed to be part of a family. Now, here she was with a niece who had her eye color, a brother who spoke in nearly-complete sentences…and a Katniss.

Yes, they didn't look typical but they were hers and they were enough.

Hopefully, once they knew everything, they would still care about her.

"Did you guys have breakfast yet?" she suddenly asked anxiously. "I should cook for you—I mean I kept you up!"

Peeta and Katniss looked to one another before their eyes went to her curiously. She felt the burn of their concerned stares.

_Laughter…eyes on her strange, pale body…a warm, heavy hand over her mouth…_

The doorbell echoed through the house.

"Prim…why don't you get that?" Katniss suggested slowly. "Your brother will fix breakfast for you."

"I got you soymilk." His eyes went to the ground and his lips disappeared behind his coffee cup.

She had to say that if she learned anything since coming to live in this house, it was that her brother was observant.

Somehow, Peeta had noticed that she was lactose intolerant. From that first day, he had seen that she put very little milk in her cereal. Also, when Katniss made sandwiches—they had an obscene amount of bread due to Peeta's job—she never put cheese on Prim's.

"Okay," she told the parents. Prim nodded at her brother. "Thanks for noticing."

Prim rushed out of the kitchen before she did something stupid—like start crying or something to that nature.

Walking down the stairs to the front door, she opened it and found a tall, dark-haired boy staring at her.

"Who are you?" he asked suspiciously.

"You're at _my_ front door," Prim responded tersely. "Who are you?"

"Gale, Katniss' brother," the boy told her with a furrowed brow. He held up a paper bag. "I brought her dried mangoes—her favorite."

"Okay, Katniss' brother," she said. "She's upstairs. Follow me."

Turning, Prim heard him close the door as they ascended the stairs. She could feel his eyes following her movements.

"You never told me who you were," Gale said from behind her.

"I'm Peeta's sister," Prim replied as they reached the top of the stairs.

Gale snorted as he went to her side. "Well, Peeta's sister—I've never heard a thing about you. But, I never hear much from Peeta."

"At least he's constant in that aspect," she retorted.

He grinned crookedly at her. His eyes were the same color as Katniss' though his were much sharper shaped than her friend's.

"Do you have a name or should I refer to you as Peeta's sister every time I come around?"

"It's Primrose," she informed him.

Gale stared—and it bugged her. However, Prim didn't want to be a total bitch—afterall, he was Katniss' brother—and she liked _her_.

"Primrose…" he repeated, letting her name linger against his lips. "I like it."

She smiled in spite of her annoyance at his penetrating stare. "I'm into it."

Together, they went into the kitchen and Katniss jumped from her seat seeing her visitor. "GALE!"

"Wait—don't rush," Gale retorted. "Mothers never run—they're too busy wiping drool off their kids' faces."

"Screw that!" Katniss ran into his arms and he lifted her off her feet. Pulling away, she looked him over. "You look tired. Have you been getting enough sleep? How are the kids? Is Posy still wetting the bed?"

"One question at a time, sis," Gale told her with an easy smile. He went to Peeta and the two shook hands. "Is she driving you crazy with all these questions, too? Kind of re-thinking the whole getting her pregnant thing, huh?"

"We make nice-looking babies," Peeta told him quietly, a proud smile on his lips. "So I can deal with the questions."

"Speaking of babies—" Gale went to the bassinet where Sarah lay and easily picked her up. "—she's a beauty. I'll have to tell Allie and Posy about her. They keep wondering if she'll have dark hair like ours or be a blonde like Mom and Allie. What's her name?"

"Sarah," Katniss said, sinking into her seat, her grey eyes faraway. "Mom—how's she doing?"

Gale's eyes left Sarah's face briefly as he answered his sister. "She's…okay."

Prim watched their interaction carefully. Katniss looked so expectant at his words.

She could understand the need to know just a little something about one's mother.

Sarah let out a little whine and Prim went over to Gale. "I think that she needs a bottle. I'll heat one up so you and Katniss can talk."

"Let me," Peeta suddenly offered, his eyes meeting Prim's in worry. "Eat some breakfast—you had a rough night."

He took Sarah carefully from Gale's arms, holding her easily in the crook of his, before going to the stove to heat water to warm her bottle.

Prim sat down next to Katniss, where the cereal box and soymilk were set up for her.

"Has she asked about me?" Katniss asked quietly, her hands reaching into the paper bag that Gale brought for her.

Gale shook his head, his eyes clouding. "She's been busy, herself."

Katniss peered at her brother. "What do you mean?"

"She's pregnant again."

Gale's words suddenly stilled the room. Prim watched Katniss' jaw slowly drop in disbelief at his words, her eyes widening as she tried to comprehend what he was telling her.

"She can't be…" Katniss said quietly. "I thought that the doctors said that it was too dangerous. And, she's supposed to go back to work. Now, she'll never leave—"

"Come on, Katniss," her brother replied wearily. "You and I know that she will _never_ leave Cray—"

"DON'T YOU EVER SAY THAT NAME IN THIS HOUSE!" Katniss pushed herself from her seat before rushing out of the kitchen.

They all listened to her angry, stomping footsteps and the slam of the upstairs door.

"I'll go check on her," Peeta offered before placing Sarah in Prim's arms. He turned to Gale. "Will you be staying long?"

Gale shook his head. "Working a long shift so I have to get going soon and with Katniss gone—I don't like leaving the kids alone too long."

Peeta nodded. "I'll call."

Gale nodded back before her brother disappeared from the kitchen to check on Katniss.

The boy rested his head in his hands before turning to her.

"We must be a real joy to be around," Gale said to Prim with a soft smile.

"I've never really understood the concept of joy," Prim replied bluntly.

"You shouldn't frown so much, Primrose." His eyes looked her over, his lips rising into a soft grin. "You're too pretty to be so sad."

"Pretty always gets you into trouble." Her eyes went to Sarah, cradled against her. "Except when you're her."

"I will agree with you on that," Gale said after a moment. Standing up from his chair, he gave her a hopeful smile. "Will you walk me down the stairs?"

She got up begrudgingly. "I need to close the door, anyway."

Together, they went into the hallway; Gale watching her slow, careful movements as she walked with Sarah down the steps. "No one is forcing you to, Primrose."

Her breath hitched at his words.

Force was a concept that she was all too familiar with.

Prim turned to him as they got to the bottom.

"I'm not good with people," she told him. "I mean, Peeta is my brother and he's such a social butterfly…" Gale snorted at her words. "…and the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. So, I'm sorry if I'm not one of those people who are comfortable talking your ear off."

"You're home now," Gale told her gently. "You don't have to be anyone but yourself."

She felt her eyes suddenly burning. "I'm not sure who that is just yet."

"Listen." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. Reaching inside, he took out a card. "If Katniss or you need anything, my business card—" His cheeks went scarlet as he gazed at her. "I'm a manager at a restaurant supply warehouse."

"What would I need from you?"

Gale gave her an easy smile. "I just want to get to know you, Primrose—see if you'll laugh at one of my stupid jokes or something like that." He opened the door and stepped out. "Whatever you're willing to give me, really."

Prim wasn't sure what he was up to. However, something told her that she could trust him just as she trusted Katniss.

"Well, first off—" She gave him a tentative smile. "—you can just call me Prim."

* * *

><p>Spooned against him, Katniss let Peeta drag his lips along the length of her neck. She relaxed beside him; her back against his chest as he continued his gentle ministrations along her skin.<p>

Even without words, Peeta always found a way to ease her.

Katniss moved away slightly.

"We can't." Her body throbbed in protest to her words. "Six weeks—that's what the doctor told me."

"Did she also wave a bible in your face?" Peeta joked as he nipped at her ear.

Katniss arched against him. "No, but she did give me a nice pamphlet about birth control." She looked over her shoulder and met his eyes. "We shouldn't have left them down there. Gale has a thing for blondes."

"Prim didn't seem like she was taking his bait," he told her. "She's very cautious."

She chuckled. "Remind you of anyone?"

"Did you want to talk about what happened downstairs?" Peeta suddenly asked her.

Katniss shifted quickly; her hips straddling his. Underneath the thin cloth of her leggings, she felt him pulsating against her center.

How easy it would be for them to just come together.

This part of their relationship was always easy, always seamless—from that first time in that dark cave of an alleyway to this very moment as she sat on top of him.

She met Peeta's eyes, his gaze expectant and longing. She hated and loved that look.

God, these next six weeks were going to be hell.

But, there were other ways to distract him.

Her hands went to the button of his jeans.

"No, I don't."

* * *

><p>"Wow. Gale comes on strong, doesn't he?" Katniss shifted a bundled Sarah in her arms as they walked through the refrigerated section of the small grocery. "Sorry about that."<p>

"I know he gave me his number," Prim replied as she opened the fridge to take a carton of soymilk out. "But, I didn't realize that he wanted me to actually call."

It had only been a week since she had met Katniss' older brother.

However, Gale seemed to want her to know that he was there. He had invited her to meet him at work—to 'just hang out'. She wasn't sure what that meant but he had stammered his way through the invite and hung up quickly after she agreed.

Katniss turned to her, a grin on her face. "Are you going on a date with my brother?"

"It is not a date—it's a hang," she protested despite the warmth filling her face. "Because, whatever we all are is strange enough. Let's not add the creepy sibling trading."

Her friend snorted as they made a turn onto a small, tight aisle. Katniss looked down at her daughter and smiled tenderly.

"Whatever happens," Katniss began. "Just be careful. I love my brother—but sometimes when you put a boy and a girl in an enclosed space…things happen."

Prim touched a finger to Sarah's upturned nose before meeting Katniss' eyes. "Obviously."

Katniss reached over to a shelf and grabbed a small packet of dried mangoes.

"'_Cebu's Finest'_," she read before turning to Prim. "Do you know that these things were the reason I met Peeta?" Katniss tossed them into the basket that Prim held. "These were the foundation of our—whatever."

"Romantic," Prim retorted. "Care to elaborate?"

As they rounded the aisle, she knocked into someone.

She stopped to meet the person's eyes and froze at the familiar shape of them. "I'm sorry!"

Looking the older woman over to make sure that she was alright, Prim quickly took in her appearance. Her hair was the color of wheat and her skin was cream-colored though her cheeks were bright red being so flustered by their contact.

Prim continued her apology, "I wasn't looking…"

"I-It's alright." The woman's voice shook anxiously as she tightened her coat around her slender body.

Katniss went to the woman, her grey eyes wide. "Mom?"

Prim suddenly realized why the woman seemed familiar.

She looked exactly like Katniss, except for her coloring.

Immediately, the woman stiffened and her eyes zeroed in on Katniss' eager face. Prim saw her briefly soften seeing Sarah before she went to Katniss once more and her stare hardened.

"Stay away from me, Katniss." Her blue eyes were frosty as she back stepped down the aisle. "Just stay away."

Turning, Katniss' mother rushed out the door.

Katniss looked crestfallen as she stared out at the space where her mother once stood.

Her friend suddenly grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards the exit.

"What are you doing?" she asked Katniss as the shock of her move caused Prim to drop the basket of groceries. The contents scattered out onto the floor as they ran out of the store. "KATNISS!"

For a moment, Prim worried that they were going to chase after Katniss' mother.

Instead her friend dragged her away from the grocery wordlessly and they began a silent, fast march down the street, farther away from the store, and farther away from the strange confrontation between Katniss and her mother.

Prim was beginning to sweat under the rushed pace of their walk. The afternoon sun was hitting her cheek, letting her know that they were just an hour or two to sunset. They were getting further from their house and she worried about walking home in the dark with Katniss and Sarah.

Finally, they reached a bench atop a steep hill. Below them stood a park with metal playground equipment, the scent of weed wafting through the air.

Katniss sat down before promptly bursting into tears, pressing her face against Sarah's bundled form. Her niece was unaware; asleep due to the somehow soothing vibrations of their rushed stroll.

Prim waited.

There was nothing else to do.

Finally, Katniss turned to Prim, face red and grey eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"Do you want to know?" she asked in a choked voice. "About me?"

Katniss already knew her answer.

And, so she began to talk.

* * *

><p>The next chapter will be a flashback—and all from Katniss' POV.<p>

Are you excited? I am.

There are going to be some changes to the story. For example, the Hawthorne name does not exist—only Everdeen. Also, there will definitely be some age changes when it comes to all of Katniss' siblings.

Gale, if anyone is curious, is eighteen—two years older than Katniss.

Also, there is a brand called 'Cebu's Finest' that sells dried mangoes.

As always, comments, reviews and hellos are welcomed on Tumblr, FF, and AO3.

Next, Chapter Four: Katniss

Till then, JLaLa


	4. Chapter Four: Katniss

Thank you for your awesome feedback! They have been a great joy to read.

The characters of The Hunger Game Trilogy do not belong to me.

**Trigger warning: mentions of sexual assault, strong abuse scenes, and underage sex**

We Go Down

_**Chapter Four: Katniss**_

_One Year Earlier…_

"Katniss?"

Her eyes gingerly opened to see Posy's identical grey eyes staring at her. Slowly, Katniss sat up and gave her little sister a tired smile.

"What is it, sweetheart?" she asked.

The little girl bit her lip nervously, her eyes suddenly pooling with tears. "I wet the bed again."

It had been happening for a year now—ever since Posy was first punished by Cray. Her sister had accidentally left one of her shoes in the wrong place. When Cray almost tripped on it, he had gone off the handle. The end result had been a welt on Posy's backside that had swelled so badly that it took days, and several ice packs, for her to sit properly.

The memory had never left Katniss' five-year-old sister. How could it?

So, it manifested into a bed-wetting issue.

"Allie," Katniss called out to her seven-year-old sister. Allie quickly shot up from her bed in the corner of the small bedroom. "Help Posy change for school and then give me her clothes."

"Sure," Allie said as she scrambled out of bed and took Posy's hand. "Come on, Pose. Let's get you out of those wet clothes."

"Thanks, Al," Katniss told her sister gratefully.

Allie was always serious for such a young girl; her stature and eyes seemed to make her look much older. She was tall for her age; her blue eyes were somber, and she always wore her golden hair in a simple, pulled-back ponytail.

Allie stayed out of trouble and was always quiet—it was probably why she was Cray's favorite. Katniss hated to think of any other reasons why the young girl avoided her stepfather's punishments better than anyone.

Quickly, Katniss went to Posy's bed and pulled out the damp fitted sheet. Going to their closet, she pulled out the spare sheet that she hid behind her books and went back to the bed to cover the mattress. She hastily fixed Posy's bed before taking the damp sheet and placing it in a small laundry bag.

"All ready," Allie called out before kissing Posy's cheek affectionately. "I even braided her hair like yours—but, in two braids instead of one."

Katniss went to the two girls. Posy was already in her school uniform, her hair braided neatly and her olive-skinned face getting some of its color back.

"You look very pretty," she told Posy before kissing the top of her head. Then, Katniss went to Allie and put an arm around her. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Allie gave her a small smile. "I don't know what we'd do without you, either."

Katniss kissed her forehead gently. "Get dressed quickly—I have to wake the boys and then wash up before _he _wakes up."

She went to the door, slowly opening it, and peeking out before stepping into the hallway. Going to the door across, Katniss knocked twice before opening it and looking inside. Vick, who was eleven, was already fixing his bed while Rory, their eight-year-old brother, was shuffling to their closet.

"Morning Katniss," they chorused together.

"Everything good?" she asked with a grin.

"I think Vick had a dirty dream," Rory joked, his young face lifting in a bright smile. He was the joker of the family. However, he left his jokes hidden whenever Cray was around.

"Did not," Vick retorted, his own cheeks scarlet. "I had a dream that I was in a race."

Vick was the athlete of the family—long-limbed and tall for a pre-teen. He played basketball for his school's team and ran track. Cray took all of his trophies and placed them on the mantle of the living room.

Her brother was never not number one—there were consequences if he ever lost.

"Be ready soon," she warned seriously. The boys nodded before she closed the door.

Katniss scrambled into the open door of the bathroom down their hallway. Their three-bedroom, one bathroom house was hectic on school days and she wanted to avoid any conflict before breakfast. It was always a bad day for everyone if they didn't have it together by the time breakfast came.

Closing the bathroom door, she made sure that it locked—twice. She used the toilet hastily and made sure not to put toilet paper in it, since it tended to clog, before flushing. Katniss brushed her teeth and washed her face before wiping the water off the floor; the small sink tended to cause water to fall on the bathroom tiling.

When Katniss opened the door, she found herself almost colliding into her stepfather.

"Good morning," she mumbled, her eyes looking downward.

"Katniss," Cray drawled before lifting her chin with his finger and her stomach turned at his slight touch. "Don't mumble. I don't like it." There was a slight sneer in his voice despite the fact that his eyes roved over her with interest. "Where are you going in such a rush?"

"I have to get ready for school." Katniss moved passed him quickly. "Also, Mom needs help for brea—"

His hand shot up to grab her arm and the need to vomit rose within her throat.

He was going to make her go into the bathroom.

"I need someone to help me shave," he told her. "You were always good at it—"

Katniss panicked. It had been months since she had gotten caught like this.

Last time this happened, her knees were bruised from the rough tiling of the bathroom. She had to tell her P.E. teacher that she scraped them playing with her brothers and sisters.

No one believed it was because Cray had forced her on her knees and grabbed her hair before—

"Katniss." She looked over Cray's shoulder to see Gale in the hallway, his steely eyes focused on their stepfather. "We're going to be late."

Gale was the only one that Cray never touched—not since her older brother had clearly become stronger than the much older, gray-haired man.

"I'll be ready in five," she said hastily before walking past her stepfather and down to her room.

Katniss breathed out in relief.

She was safe—for now.

* * *

><p>"You have to watch yourself, Katniss," Gale warned her as they drove to their school.<p>

Her brother had been completely silent as they dropped off the younger kids to their private school which was close to the house.

It was only the best school for _Cray's_ children.

She and Gale went to a public high school in the rougher part of their hometown—another way for Cray to let them know that they were nothing to him.

"I would've gotten into the bathroom quicker but Posy wet the bed," she explained. "I put the sheets in the trunk, by the way. Can you drop it off at the dry cleaners? I'll pick it up during my ten at the market."

"Sure." His eyes remained on the road. "I'm sorry that I got upset. Cray raised my rent—I will never save enough for us to get out of there." Her brother sighed in frustration.

"I still have a year or two," she told him. "Also, I'm saving what I can from my salary at Haymitch's. He's paying me pretty well to just sit around and do my homework in-between cashiering."

It had always been their dream to leave home as soon as Katniss turned eighteen. The children would be okay as long as they were obedient, and their mother was so lost in her own world that it would not matter one way or another if her kids were gone.

Until then, Katniss spent a lot of time showing the kids how to avoid angering their father. It would matter very little if authorities were brought in. Cray worked for the police department as a supervisor and he made damn sure that they knew how loyal his team was to him.

Her older brother worked almost overzealously at his own job. He was a manager for a restaurant supply warehouse in the city and did a lot of overtime.

Gale had started working like this since he had caught Cray with one hand over her mouth and his other under her skirt.

It was her own fault for forgetting to change into pants after work.

Parking on the sidewalk next to their school, Katniss got out of the car and turned to see Madge and Annie, her classmates and friends, rushing towards her.

"Hey Katniss," Madge greeted her with a bright grin. Creamy-skinned and golden-haired, her friend was wanted by many of her male classmates. Unfortunately, Madge seemed only interested in getting Gale's attention. So far, her attempts had been in vain. "I totally fell asleep last night and forgot to look over my chemistry notes. Can I see yours?"

"Don't give them to her," Annie said as they walked into the school. "She wasn't studying because she was watching some reality show."

Annie was the studious one of the three—the all-star, really. She was junior class president, head of practically every committee, and a cheerleader. The dark-haired, green-eyed girl had it all—especially since she was dating Finnick, one of Gale's friends, and a senior.

"You're fucking lame," Madge told Annie. She looked to Katniss once more. "Can I?"

Katniss grinned before handing Madge her notebook. "You owe me."

"How about I pay for your ID for this Friday?" Madge offered.

"Deal," she replied. The bell rang and the three walked into the building. "Finally, some normal time."

Annie turned to her curiously. "What?"

Katniss shook her head. "Nothing."

No one could ever understand how much relief these six hours of school brought her.

* * *

><p>The rest of the day had passed quickly. When she arrived at Haymitch's hole-in-the-wall grocery, the weather had turned considerably warm.<p>

It was that time in the autumn when the Bay Area suddenly went up several temperatures.

She had changed after school from her jeans and t-shirt to a bright-yellow sleeveless dress. The store could be unbearable because of the heat.

"Hey Haymitch," she greeted the scruffy, dark-haired man who was reading a newspaper at the counter. "How's it going?"

"Scratchin' and survivin', sweetheart," her boss told her with a smirk.

"Good times," she retorted with a snort.

Haymitch had known her father. They had served together in the Gulf War—a war her father had survived. But, he did not survive a drive-by shooting during a night-shift as a parking attendant in a seedier part of the city.

Haymitch had been there for her, Gale, and her mother after her father had passed on. However with Cray in the picture, he barely communicated with their mother and had only talked to her once at church to offer Katniss a job at his small grocery.

Haymitch stood up from his stool behind the counter so she could take his place. "The new bakery company rep is coming in today with our new delivery. Let him know that I'm in the back office."

"Sure," Katniss replied as she put her book bag against the wall. Placing her books on the counter, she sat down on the stool. "What's his name?"

"Peeta," Haymitch informed her. "Peeta Mellark."

* * *

><p>The rest of her shift at the grocery passed quietly. The after-school crowd which included Vick and some of his friends had come in to buy some sour-powers and sodas. She had humored the boys, even slipping Vick an extra packet of candy for their brothers and sister.<p>

Cray didn't allow candy inside the house so she warned her brother to keep it hidden.

The store had become stuffy as her shift progressed and eventually Haymitch placed an old, metal fan out in the back corner of the counter. The thing was loud but it had a decent amount of power between its weathered blades.

Her back was finally cool and so Katniss started on her homework.

Customers never really cared that she was occupied—some of them even helped her out. When she had first started at Haymitch's market, Katniss had been taking geometry and had passed the class because of a group of construction workers who came in. A lot of them were very good at deciphering angles and it gave her a new appreciation for the math application.

A small packet of dried mangoes was placed on her counter as she began her work on imaginary numbers.

Katniss took a look at the packet and smiled. "'_Cebu's Finest'_, huh?" She started to ring the customer up, her eyes on the problem on her paper. "That'll be $4.90."

A hand held out a five-dollar bill and she marveled at the person's long, elegant fingers.

Curiously, Katniss looked up and her breath was caught at the pair of bright, blue eyes staring back at her.

The boy was handsome, that was for sure.

Along with the blue eyes were the dark lashes surrounding them. His lips were full, curved, and smiling gently at her. He had brushed his full, sunny hair back and she almost unconsciously wanted to reach over to run her hand through it.

Instead, her hand reached out to give him his change.

"Here you go," she said slowly.

Katniss tried not to focus too much on the handsomely chiseled face in front of her and instead went back to the imaginary numbers.

"What are you working on?" he asked quietly, his eyes focused on her intently.

She blushed. She _never_ blushed. "Oh—"

"Peeta!" Katniss turned to see Haymitch walking towards them. He went to the boy to shake his hand. "I thought you weren't going to make it."

"Sorry, Haymitch," Peeta apologized. "Had a little bit of a contract discussion at my last stop."

"It's okay," her boss replied easily and with a friendly smile on his face. "Let's head on back to my office."

Peeta nodded, giving her boss an agreeable smile.

Haymitch's eyes went to the packet on the counter. "So, you like these, too?" Her boss gave her a quick wink. "I thought Katniss here was the only one who did."

Peeta met her eyes. "Well, I guess she's not alone then."

* * *

><p>Katniss went back to her work. However, her mind would sometimes go back to the boy with the blue eyes—the one sitting in Haymitch's office.<p>

Was this what it was like to have a crush on someone?

She had never thought much about boys, having to concentrate on her family, her schoolwork, and not getting on Cray's bad side.

Or, within his eyesight.

A sinking feeling came over her. The realization that she would never really feel clean—not after everything that had happened to her.

"Have a good evening." She saw Peeta nod at her as he moved towards the exit.

Katniss gave him a weak smile as her eyes followed him out the door and out of her mind—for the moment.

"He forgot these." She looked to see Haymitch at the counter, holding the packet of dried mangoes. He eyed her before holding them out to her. "Catch up with him, won't you?"

Katniss wordlessly took the packet and rushed out the door.

She looked around the sloping street before seeing him across the way, about to get into his white company truck.

"PEETA!"

He turned at her call and Katniss ran over to him, slowing as he met her in the middle of the lonely concrete road.

Holding out the packet, she swallowed the nervousness in her throat. "You forgot these."

Peeta smiled shyly before taking the packet, his fingers briefly brushing over hers as he took the pouch from her. She nodded trying to quiet the erratic beating of her heart.

"Thanks, Katniss," he finally said. His eyes suddenly went to the top of the road. "This is my favorite part of the day."

Her eyes looked over to where the sky's horizon was lit with the bright orange of the sunset. Above that sky was the dark purple hue of beginning night. She sighed thinking that it was almost time for her to go home.

"I've never really looked at the sky," she replied, her voice low.

"You should," Peeta told her simply.

The warm breeze began to pick up and her long hair swiftly whipped across her face.

Peeta's hand reached forward to tuck the whirling strands behind her ear and her lips shook feeling that slight brush of his hand against her lobe.

And, she suddenly came alive.

"See you around." Peeta slowly let his hand fall back to his side, his eyes still staring into hers.

"Bye, Peeta."

She turned to go back to the store—but, not before taking one last glance of the sunset.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, Katniss came home earlier than she had planned.<p>

She was supposed to stay an extra half-hour to close up the store with Haymitch. However, she kept sweeping the same spot on the floor and her boss ended up sending her home—with an extra bag of bread from their new supplier, Panem Bakery.

It was obvious that her mind was somewhere else. Haymitch knew it, too. He had good-naturedly joked that he would pass her schedule along to Peeta so that he would come _only_ during her work hours.

"You never know," he had told her with a chuckle. "You might end up going on a date or two with the guy."

Katniss had never been on a date. She had kissed one guy—Gale's best friend, Finnick—and it was only a birthday kiss.

On his girlfriend's insistence.

Because, it was pathetic to have never been kissed at sixteen and Annie knew it.

It was even more pathetic to have been kissed only once and for the experience to have been…okay.

"Hey Mama." She placed her backpack on the floor and pulled up the seat next to her mother at the kitchen table.

Her mother gave her a small smile as she snapped the string beans piled in front of her and tossed them into the colander next to Katniss.

"Hey baby," her mother greeted her. "How was work?"

"It was good," she replied and reached into her backpack to pull out the bag of bread. "Haymitch gave us a loaf from the new supplier."

Her mother nodded in acknowledgement. "That's nice of him." She looked over her shoulder nervously. "Don't tell Cray—he doesn't like handouts. Just tell him that you bought it from the store."

Katniss scowled before taking a handful of string beans.

Her life seemed like a series of schedules and rules.

Don't tell Cray about getting free things. Wake up early enough to use the bathroom before anyone gets up. Keep your room clean and tidy. Be in bed by nine-thirty.

Don't cry.

Don't scream.

Don't speak.

She learned the last rule when she was six—the first time that she had ever been left alone in the house with Cray. Her mother had just given birth to Vick and hadn't been released from the hospital.

Katniss had her own room at the time. Her stepfather had come in and talked to her about being a big girl now that she had a little brother. Big girls were always respectful of their parents. They always kept themselves and their rooms tidy. They only spoke when they were spoken to.

They knew how to take instruction well.

So, when Cray had told her to lie back on her bed and close her eyes, Katniss had listened.

Because that's what big girls did.

When he put his hand under her skirt, she had whimpered.

Cray had almost twisted her arm as he whispered the last rule into her ear.

That day, Gale had come home to find her curled up in bed, skirt rumpled and tears running down her face. He was only eight and could not understand what had happened.

It took him a year and catching Cray in the act for him to understand.

After that, her brother made an extra effort to get home as fast as he could.

She never mentioned any of it to her mother. Big girls don't speak.

And her mother had become even busier once Rory came, then Allie, and finally Posy.

Even now, her mother could never understand why Katniss had made such an effort to wake up early, stay out of the house as long as she could, or even why she always made sure that their bedroom door was locked.

"Mom," she suddenly said as she snapped a string bean. "Before you met Dad—had you ever been kissed?"

Her mother thought for a moment before shaking her head. "No, I was only thirteen when I first met your father. I lived a very sheltered life and your grandparents would not let me date anyone until I was fourteen. Even then, your Dad had to properly court me."

Her mother had been a Southern belle. She had come from a life of finishing schools and debutante balls. Her mother, with her golden hair and cornflower blue eyes, was once a beauty queen. She had even showed Katniss her old tiaras once.

However, she was also too delicate for the life they were leading. Now, she was nothing but a shadow of her former self.

"So, Dad was your first kiss?" she continued.

Her mother smiled to herself. For a moment, Katniss could see the glimmer that had died with their father.

"Yes," her mother replied quietly, her voice wistful. She looked to Katniss. "You have only a number of firsts in your life, Katniss. Each one has to be special. Because, it is only a moment—but, you will remember it for the rest of your life." Her mother gave her a small smile. "Why? Is there someone that you like?"

It was at the tip of her tongue to tell her mother about Peeta.

Suddenly, she saw her mother stiffen. Katniss turned to find Cray standing at the doorway of the kitchen. He strode in forebodingly, going to the pot at the stove, and lifting the lid.

Her mother gave Cray a nervous smile. "Dinner should be ready soon, sweetheart."

Cray lifted the wooden spoon that rested on the counter and dipped it into the pot.

Tasting it, he whipped around to her mother. "I told you not to add anything different into the recipe!"

Her mother stood up quickly. "B-b-but, I didn't—"

Cray threw the spoon at her mother, hitting her mother's face; splashing hot soup against her porcelain skin.

Her stepfather bore down on them. "WHEN DID I SAY THAT IT WAS OKAY TO ARGUE WITH ME?"

Her mother looked to her, her blue eyes blank.

"Katniss, go and make sure that the kids are cleaned up for dinner," she instructed in a quiet, firm voice.

She rushed out of the kitchen, wincing only once when she heard the sharp slap of Cray's rough hand to her mother's delicate skin.

Her mother never cried out—it would only make things worse.

Katniss took a deep breath before walking to Vick and Rory's room. She knocked quietly before opening the door. Vick was sitting at their small desk, notebook open, while Rory was sitting on the floor with his worksheets.

"What's going on?" Vick asked, his grey eyes troubled when another sharp slap echoed down the hallway.

Katniss looked down the hallway before turning back to them. "Wait for me to knock again and then get ready for dinner."

There was a crash of a chair and she bit down the urge to rush over to the kitchen.

"Are you going to call Gale?" Rory asked as he went to his bed.

Katniss' eyes traveled to his shaking hands. He had developed the habit just recently and it was starting to worry her.

"Of course," she replied. "Just be quiet. Don't speak."

"We know the rules," Vick told her.

Katniss nodded before closing the door. She could hear herself repeating Cray's words—perpetuating this horrible series of schedules and rules.

And, she hated herself for it.

* * *

><p>"<em>And I will stay up through the night<br>Let's be clear, won't close my eyes  
>And I know that I can survive<br>I'll walk through fire to save my life…"_

"What's your name, girl?"

The firm chest pressed against her back as he leaned to speak into her ear. It was so loud in the club that Katniss could barely hear his words. His hands went to her hips as they danced and she took a calming breath before turning to her unknown dance partner.

"Her name is 'none of your damn business'." Katniss looked to see Gale approaching her along with Madge in a dress that was definitely much shorter than hers. Her brother moved in on the guy, dressed in a button down and looking not as cute as she had thought. "Now scoot."

"Damn bro," the guy replied. "You have your own piece. Share a little bit."

"That little bit is my sister—and she's too young for your tired ass," Gale responded, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

Madge went to her, offering Katniss the glass in her hand. "Your brother is very hot when he's over-protective. Do you think that he likes me?"

"Madge, you know that Gale isn't interested in anything else but working and getting the hell out of our house," Katniss replied. "No one exists outside the realm of our family at this point."

"Jesus, Katniss! You sound like you're in some sort of weird prison," her friend retorted.

Madge had no idea.

Finnick and Annie were suddenly rushing through the crowd. Annie joined them as Finnick went to break the beginning of a fight between Gale and her now-scared partner.

"Let it go, Gale." Finnick put an arm around Gale's shoulder and her brother shrugged it off. "Let's not get Thresh in trouble, alright?" Her brother turned to look at Annie's handsome boyfriend, his eyes suddenly clearing. "I think that you've had enough to drink."

Gale nodded after a moment and turned to walk over to them.

"It was just a dance," Katniss told her older brother.

"No one should touch you, Katniss," her brother slurred drunkenly. His eyes were suddenly pained. "Not without you saying so. No more…no more…you're still pure."

"What is he talking about?" Annie asked her.

She had to stop her brother before he said too much.

Katniss sucked in a breath. "You're drunk." She scooted under Gale's arm to help him walk. "I'll drive."

"Okay," he agreed.

Together, they walked quickly out of the club, waving to Thresh, their friend and the bouncer.

"When your brother drinks, he goes all out," Finnick remarked as he helped carry her brother on his opposite side.

Far behind them, Annie and Madge tittered on their high heels. She had opted to borrow Madge's black thigh-high boots, silvery shift dress, and cropped leather jacket for their night out.

"It's been a hard week," she replied softly.

"Your brother alluded to something of that sort," Finnick said to her carefully.

Their mother was already sporting a busted lip by the time Gale arrived at the house. Their dinner had been completely silent and Posy had slept in her bed for the remainder of the week.

The rest of their days had progressed as they always did: school in the day, work at Haymitch's in the afternoons, and back home to help her mother with dinner—silently.

"Listen," Katniss began. "Families go through things—"

They got to the car and she reached into her brother's pocket to get the keys as he giggled drunkenly.

"I understand." Finnick opened the passenger door to help Gale into his seat before meeting her eyes. "But eventually, people are going to notice."

"We are almost out of there," she told Finnick firmly. "Cray hates us because we're not his. He's always made that perfectly clear. Once Gale and I move out, the kids will be alright. He won't hurt them—not like he hurts us."

Even as she heard herself talking, she sounded unconvinced.

Finnick put Gale's seatbelt on before turning to her. "And, if he does?"

Katniss couldn't respond.

* * *

><p>By the time they had dropped off Madge, Gale had sobered up enough to drive home.<p>

"You almost ruined our cover," she told her brother grumpily.

It was almost two in the morning and Katniss was exhausted. Dragging Gale to his car and dropping off their friends had tired her out. Now, she sat in the passenger's seat staring out the window as they drove up to their house.

"I'm sorry," Gale replied. "I didn't mean it. It was the alcohol. Not all of us can be such a gifted actor like you."

She turned to him as he parked along the sidewalk. "Then let's tell everyone, Gale. Let's tell everyone how Cray beats up our mother! Or, how his own kids are scared of him! Posy wets the bed and Rory's hands tremble. None of them will even call him Dad—because he won't let them."

"Don't be so fucking melodramatic," Gale argued. Her eyes were suddenly heavy with tears and her brother sobered immediately. "Katniss, I didn't mean that."

She unbuckled her seatbelt, practically ripping it off her body. Opening the door, Katniss jumped out of her seat and slammed the door behind her.

"KATNISS!" Gale rounded the car and went to her. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I'm sorry, too," Katniss told him angrily. "I'm sorry that we're stuck in such a shitty situation. And, that I worry constantly that we'll all be separated. Or, that if I don't get up early enough or forget to lock our bedroom door—I pay the consequences!"

"WE ALL PAY!" Gale yelled at her suddenly.

"But, who pays on their knees?" Katniss countered. "Or, on their back?" She squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm tired of paying, Gale."

She was suddenly exhausted.

And, feeling empty—so, so empty.

"I have to be owed something," she told him. "Or, else—what's the point of living this life?"

Katniss turned to walk away.

"Where are you going?" Gale called out.

"I NEED TO GET AWAY!" she yelled in response. "I'LL BE BACK!"

She would always come back.

The thought filled her with anguish and as Katniss continued her walk, she began to sob.

It had been so long since she had cried.

Katniss couldn't even remember if she had cried at her own father's funeral. She remembered that it had been wet, but warm—just like it was right now. She wrapped her jacket tighter against her body, feeling unbelievably cold all of a sudden.

She ignored the ringing of her cellphone knowing that it was Gale. Her feet had taken her blocks away from her house and away from that life.

It seemed almost possible to just leave it all.

Then, she thought of her brothers and sisters—of her mother. Despite it all, Katniss loved them fiercely.

If she had to choose, Katniss would rather that she suffered and not them.

Quietly, she ducked into a small arched alleyway between two brick buildings and sat down on an elevated brick platform. Sniffing her tears back, Katniss reached into her pocket and texted Gale that she would return home after she was calm—she didn't want to disturb the kids.

Putting her phone back in her pocket, she sat back against the wall and let the tears fall. It was okay to fall apart here—her own private cave. She let out a choked sob, her jaw hurting from the rapid shaking of her mouth as she let out a silent wail.

Her stomach hurt from the pain. She just wanted it to be over.

"Katniss?"

At the archway stood Peeta—his blue eyes glowing even in the dim light filtering through the alleyway. He rushed over to her, carrying a duffle over his shoulder.

Tossing the duffle easily next to her, Peeta lifted her chin so that she would meet his concerned eyes.

"What's wrong?" He searched her face for answers, his fingers brushing over her face and filling her with electricity. "Say something."

At that moment, Katniss couldn't find any words to convey what she wanted. She didn't want to be alone. She didn't want to cry. She didn't want to be unhappy.

She wanted to feel just a little bit of what she felt every time Peeta touched her.

So, Katniss showed him what she wanted. Her lips went to his, her arms wrapping around his neck to pull him closer.

Peeta responded eagerly, his head tilting to deepen their kiss as her mouth opened slightly to let his tongue touch hers. She felt drugged by the taste of him and her legs widened to draw him closer as she slipped her jacket off her shoulders.

He ripped his mouth away; his forehead resting against hers as they gazed into each other's eyes. She saw the loneliness in his and her hand reached out to touch his chin to assure him.

Peeta made her feel safe.

Her hands went to undo his belt and he tried to pull away but she stopped him by drawing his lips to hers in a heady kiss. When their kiss abruptly ended, Katniss could see the resistance fading in his eyes.

He swept his lips over hers before continuing onto her neck, her pulse point throbbing when he reached it. Peeta's hand reached under her dress and along the edges of her boy shorts. She lifted her hips to help him along as her own hands moved the zipper of his jeans down slowly.

As curiosity got the best of her, Katniss' hand reached under the elastic waistband of his briefs. Under the palm of her hand, she found hardness wrapped in velvet and gripped her hand around his length.

Her hands reached to move his jeans off his taut bottom exposing himself to her fully as his hand moved her panties down her thighs. She could feel the cool air under her dress and the warmth that had been pooling in her belly had suddenly ignited.

Katniss moved herself closer to the edge of the brick platform, her foot moving around the small of Peeta's back so that she could line herself up to him.

He looked at her, his eyes wanting. However, Katniss could see that he wanted her permission.

Peeta would never force her to do anything that she didn't want—including this.

This was her choice and hers alone.

And, she wanted him badly—nobody else but him.

Pushing forward, Katniss sheathed Peeta within her, swiftly breaking her barrier.

The amount of pain of was unexpected.

Peeta's eyes widened in realization. "Oh my God," he choked out. "T-T-This is your first time."

"I want this," she whispered, her head falling against his shoulder as she exhaled slowly to relax her body. "I want this with you—and no one else." Katniss took a deep breath as she adjusted to the feel of him still inside of her. "Don't you want this, too?"

Peeta met her eyes. "Since that first time I saw you." He let out a shaky breath. "But, it shouldn't be like this."

"I have no illusions of romance," Katniss assured him. "I just know what I want."

He seemed to understand her words. His lips went to hers once more, his tongue teasing hers until she was aching to move along the throbbing cock inside of her.

"Tell me when it's okay to move," he breathed against her, his lips going behind her neck and causing a shiver to run through her body.

Katniss arched against him and found the pain was dulling as the feeling of electricity built. She tested herself, moving carefully, and a pleasured moan escaped her lips.

"Move," she urged.

So, he did.

Slowly at first, he drew himself out just a little before pushing back in gently. Peeta kindled her body unhurriedly, heating her core until she was burning for him. Her body began to move demandingly, frantically begging for her release as her center began to pulse with the beginning of that small death that would bring her back to life. Her hips lifted up from the platform to meet his as an arm wrapped around her waist to move their bodies closer together.

She was amazed by how good it could feel—to be with someone whom she wanted and vice-versa.

Then, Katniss snapped; every part of her tightening along with her insides before falling apart and letting the burning pleasure course through her. Somewhere along her ear, Peeta whispered frantically as he came apart and she could feel him filling her, the warmth coating her insides, as he pushed up into pulsating sheath.

Shakily, they pulled apart.

"I should go home," Katniss breathlessly informed him. "My family is going to be up in about four hours."

"Oh, yeah," he responded softly. Peeta leaned down to pick up her panties. "I think these are yours."

She took them hastily from his hands. "Thanks."

"I'm going to be out of town for the next two weeks," Peeta told her after he had zipped himself up. He patted the bag next to her. "I had to do some laundry for the trip."

"I told you, Peeta," she assured him. "I don't have any illusions of romance. If I don't see you in two weeks, or two months, or even two years—I'm not going to be hurt."

"Then, why did you choose me?" he asked.

"Because, you only have a number of firsts." Katniss gave him a smile. "And, I'll remember this for the rest of my life and I'll be happy—because, it was with someone I felt was special."

Peeta shook his head. "I've never been special."

Standing up, Katniss went to him and gently pressed her lips to his. "Now you know you are."

* * *

><p><em>One Month Later<em>

Life progressed as it usually did.

After leaving Peeta in that alleyway, she returned home. Gale had let her sleep in his room, her on the bed and him on the floor. She had told her mother that they didn't want to wake any of the kids by opening the front door. Since Gale had his own entrance through the side of the house, it made sense.

When two weeks passed and Peeta didn't come to the grocery, Katniss wasn't too surprised. Neither was she upset about it. She had a feeling that he was almost embarrassed by the whole incident—like he had been the one to persuade her to have sex with him in that alleyway.

When in truth, it had been the other way around.

Maybe he was embarrassed for being so weak as to fall for someone so willing.

But, she wasn't.

Katniss still thought about that night, going over every detail and remembering the rough trail of his lips against her sensitive skin. Her body betrayed her need for him, her insides twisting in pleasure at the memory of him hard inside her.

Then two days ago, the cold reality of what happened hit her. She had not gotten her period.

Now, here she was—sitting in Gale's office in the warehouse he worked in—trying to explain the whole story.

"You mean to tell me—you walked off for an hour, had sex with some guy, and came home?" Gale sat at his chair, disappointment in his eyes. "And, now?"

Katniss reached into her purse and pulled out the sonogram print given to her by the clinic. She pushed it across his desk towards him.

"Pregnant." She met his eyes. "About a month—so there's still something that I can do about it."

"I know what you can do about it." Gale glared at her in frustration. "You can tell the bastard that knocked you up that I'm going to kill him!"

"You won't." Katniss met his eyes firmly. "I was the one who wanted it. He wanted to stop after he found out—"

Gale's eyes went from the sonogram to her. "Found out what?"

Katniss looked down. "That I was a virgin." Her eyes met his. "I wasn't about to let _him_ take that from me, too." She let a smile rise on her lips. "And, I liked Peeta—since the moment I met him."

"Peeta sounds like a stupid name," her brother growled. "What would Dad say if he knew what you did?"

Her eyes suddenly filled. "If he was here, life would be infinitely better. But, it wouldn't have changed my mind about wanting my first time to be with someone special to me. Dad's not here, Gale. And, I'm pregnant—that is our reality and I have to deal with it. Now, are you going to keep this a secret or am I figuring this out myself?"

"I won't tell anyone—right now," Gale replied. "Are you going to tell Peeta?"

"Sure," she told her brother. "_If_ I happen to see him."

* * *

><p>Coincidentally, Peeta came to the store during her next shift. Her stomach flipped seeing his handsome face and she swallowed her nervousness.<p>

He went up to her immediately, a soft smile on his lips. "Hey."

"Hey," she greeted neutrally. "How are you?"

"Busy," Peeta replied. He searched her eyes worriedly. "I'm sorry that I didn't come by two weeks ago. I got sent to Arizona right after to negotiate a contract. I didn't want to call here and ask for you—it would look suspicious—"

"I told you that I didn't expect anything from you," Katniss replied diplomatically.

"But, I want to talk to you," Peeta insisted, his smile bashful. "Not for that—because, I want to know you."

Katniss nodded after a moment. "Finish your delivery check with Haymitch and I'll give you my number."

"Okay," he agreed before walking to Haymitch's back office.

She took a deep breath before taking some receipt paper and hastily writing her number on it—along with another small detail.

The after-school crowd came in; Katniss spent the rest of her afternoon ringing up kids for their sodas and bags of hot fries. Vick didn't come in since he had a meet at another school and she was glad. She didn't want him to see who Peeta was. He would tell Gale—who would murder the father of…it.

Haymitch and Peeta came out to the front after the line dissipated and the men shook hands.

Peeta went to her immediately after and she pushed the folded paper across the counter.

"Have a good day," she said and gave him a smile.

Haymitch raised a brow at her as Peeta walked out with the paper in his hand.

It only took Peeta a second to rush back into the store and to the counter.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" he asked in a tight voice.

Katniss stood up and smoothed her skirt before turning to Haymitch. "I'll be back."

"Sure, sweetheart." He looked between them and his eyes followed the pair as they walked out of the small grocery.

Taking her hand, Peeta led her across the street and next to his truck. He held out the paper to her. "What is this?"

"My phone number," Katniss told him easily.

"You know that's not what I'm talking about," he continued. "The message."

She read it out loud for him: "I'm pregnant."

"Holy shit." Peeta ran a hand through his hair, his blue eyes panicked. "You weren't on any birth control?"

She watched him pace. "I've been too busy studying for my SAT's to think about birth control."

"I thought you were in college," he responded in a panicked voice. "I'm going to jail, aren't I?"

"Nobody knows—except for my brother—and he's not going to say anything." Katniss grabbed his hand to stop his pacing, her eyes meeting his. "I'm not sure what I'm going to do about…it."

Taking a calming breath, the color finally returned to his face.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here for you," he finally said.

She found herself wrapping her arms around his waist, her head going to his chest as Peeta pulled her closer.

"It's alright. You're here now."

* * *

><p>"You look tired," her mother remarked, later that night.<p>

They had been shelling peas for the past twenty minutes as her heart beat in her ears.

In her pocket was Peeta's business card, his cellphone number and his home address written on it—in case she needed him. He had promised to stay out of it until she made her decision.

"Mom." Katniss looked to her. "I need to tell you something."

Her mother met her eyes—and somehow, Katniss could already tell that she knew. "No, Katniss…"

She had to say it out loud. "I'm pregnant."

It happened instantaneously—the blinding pain as she was yanked by her hair and thrown to the ground. Her head hit the linoleum and she had no time to register what was happening as she was kicked in the back with a hard boot.

Somewhere, she wasn't sure from where—Katniss could hear the screaming of the children, specifically Posy.

"YOU FUCKING TRAMP!" Cray raged as he yanked her up by her hair and smacked her—she could feel her jaw crack as he dropped her onto the floor. She landed helplessly on the ground. "I WILL KILL YOU!"

"NO!" Her mother was screaming as Cray repeatedly kicked her back. "DON'T!"

Katniss curled into herself—protecting what suddenly felt very precious to her—the baby.

She would not scream, she would not yell, she would not speak—Katniss couldn't give him that satisfaction.

Even when she felt the metal of his belt stinging her back—or when she lost count of how many times he knocked her head onto the floor. Her eyes were swollen, but she could barely make out a clump of her hair on the ground in front of her.

The more she didn't react—the more Cray showed no restraint.

Katniss knew that she would die tonight. And, it was okay.

Maybe it was for the best.

She only felt bad for the little one inside of her—for it barely started the beating of its own heart.

How quickly it would be snuffed out.

Her eyes went up to see Cray's hard-soled boot above her head.

This was it. She prayed for her family, for Peeta—and for the baby.

"STOP!" The booming voice reverberated through her head.

She could feel the gentle lift of her body back to her feet and her barely-opened eyes met the shocked ones of her brother's. Gale looked horrified at her appearance.

She gave him a woozy nod.

"Get her out of my house," Cray hissed at Gale. "She is no longer a part of our family."

"No…" Katniss suddenly said through her bruised lips. "I don't want to go." She looked over at her brothers and sisters at the doorway, tears running down their small faces. "They need me." She went to her mother, whose hands gripped the edges of the table as she stared at the surface. "Mama…please."

"Go, Katniss." Her words were more painful than the blows. "Just go."

She struggled, but Katniss glared at her mother. "You would choose him—this man—over your own flesh and blood? WHAT KIND OF MOTHER ARE YOU?"

Her mother's eyes never left the surface of the table. "JUST LEAVE, KATNISS!"

Gale led her out of the kitchen as she fell apart. "It's okay." She barely heard his words. "Katniss…I have to take you to the hospital."

Her time in this house was over.

* * *

><p>Her eyes opened to see Peeta staring at her.<p>

"You should have let me come with you," he told her, holding an ice pack to her jaw.

"Better one dead than two," Katniss whispered. She looked around to find the hospital room empty. "Where's Gale?"

"He had to go check on the kids," Peeta replied solemnly. "And, get your things." His eyes went over her swollen face before meeting her eyes once more. "The baby's alright—if you care."

Her lips trembled in relief. "I do care—more than you realize."

Leaning forward, Peeta kissed her forehead gently. "Me, too."

"Did Gale hit you?" she asked as her hand touched his wrapped one.

Peeta shook his head. "No. When the doctor went over your injuries, I got upset and punched a wall outside," he told her sheepishly. "Gale was actually the one who allowed me to see you—told them that I was your boyfriend—and that I was seventeen."

She would have laughed if her jaw didn't ache so badly. "So, you're not going to jail?"

"Not today," Peeta replied. A small smile was on her lips before he looked to her seriously. "But, you are coming home with me, alright?"

Katniss looked into his eyes. Something inside her trusted Peeta—maybe it was their baby. He or she had already bonded itself to him.

But, she also knew that there had been something that pulled her to him—way before their child was conceived.

If she was a romantic, Katniss would've called it fate.

After a moment, she responded to his question, her hand going to his cheek. "Alright."

* * *

><p>At the top of her duffle was the framed photo of her father.<p>

Gale had left only a few minutes ago, promising to visit as much as he could. He needed to be at home more. There was no one to protect their mother and siblings—now that she was no longer welcome there.

She had made him promise to remind Allie to always lock their door at night. She didn't know the depth of Cray's depravity. But, now that she was gone, Katniss wasn't sure if he would find a 'replacement'. Also, Katniss had made Gale promise to get the kids out—and if she wanted—her mother.

It still hurt to know that her mother had chosen Cray—seeing him for all that he was and seeing him beat her own daughter until he almost crushed her skull.

She would never understand that kind of strange, sick love.

For now, Katniss could cling to the light in her mother's eyes when she talked about her own father.

"Everything okay?" She looked to see Peeta at the doorway of her room. She would be sleeping in the room on the main floor.

Peeta's room was upstairs—it had been his mother's room until she had passed.

She nodded from where she sat on the floor, her hand still holding the framed photo.

He went and sat down across from her. Katniss held out the photo to him.

"My Dad," she told him.

"He's a handsome man," he remarked. His eyes went to hers. "He wasn't the one who…"

Katniss shook her head. "No, he died when I was four. I can barely remember him."

"What can you remember?" Peeta asked as he handed the photo back to her.

"Sitting on his shoulders," she recalled. "It was the only time I felt like I was free."

The dim memory of her atop her father's shoulders was beginning to fade from her memories. Now, she could recall the feeling of it, the freedom of being able to hold her arms out like a bird.

And, having the belief that she could fly if she tried hard enough.

"It's amazing what your early memories are," Peeta said softly. "I promise that our baby will only remember good things about its father."

She wiped her watery eyes—the hormones and the lack of rest had caught up with her.

"You should go to sleep," he told her, seeing her distress. Carefully, Peeta helped her up and led her to the bed. She sat down and he followed suit, looking over at her and taking her hand. "Do you need anything?"

She shook her head and smiled at him. "Do you?"

Peeta stared at her for a moment. "I want to kiss you—but, I don't know if you're ready—or if we should."

"Makes sense." Her hand went to her still-flat abdomen. "I think we've shown one another enough affection."

He grinned at her. "You're a funny girl, Katniss…" His mouth fell. "…I don't know your last name."

"I had a hospital ID—you never looked at it?" she asked incredulously.

"Nope—and Haymitch never needed to tell me your last name," he retorted. "Nor did Gale tell me—he only referred to himself as 'her brother, Gale' when he introduced himself and the doctor just called you Katniss."

"Wow—weird." She squeezed his hand. "It's Everdeen. Katniss Everdeen."

"Pretty," he said softly before looking at her. Standing up, Peeta leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight, Katniss Everdeen."

"Goodnight, Peeta…" Katniss tilted her head. "…Mellark?"

He nodded amusedly. "We have a lot to learn in eight months."

* * *

><p>But, Katniss could not sleep that night.<p>

Instead, she found herself opening the door and climbing up the dark stairs to his room.

Peeta awoke as she crawled into his bed. "Are you okay?"

She met his tired eyes. "I can't sleep. It's too quiet without my sisters." A lone tear fell down her cheek. "I miss them."

Peeta open his arms out to her. "Come here." Katniss immediately moved to his side, her head going to his chest. "I'm used to the quiet. I've always been alone."

"Are you going to be okay fitting me and this baby into your life?" she asked, her eyes meeting his in the darkness.

"I think I've been waiting for you and this baby to come into my life," Peeta whispered tenderly. "You both were the things I didn't know I wanted." He looked down at her, his eyes bright. "Now, I don't think I could ever let you go."

Katniss pushed herself up so that they were face to face. "I think you should kiss me now."

So, he did.

* * *

><p>There you go. Some of it explained, some of it not. There will be another chapter for that.<p>

A little bit of explanation about Katniss' family: Gale and Katniss are not Cray's biological children. Their father died when Katniss was 4 and Gale was 6. Katniss' mother married Cray when Katniss was around six—because, she was pregnant with Vick. In this chapter, Vick has just turned 11, Rory is 8, Allie is 7, and Posy is 5.

There's a little more explanation into their mother later on.

Also, you're probably wondering when the mention of Prim comes up—that also comes later on.

Oh, and the song that Katniss was dancing to in the club was Sia's "Elastic Heart". Also, did anyone see the play on one of my favorite television themes?

As always, hellos, reviews, and comments can be made on Tumblr, FF, and AO3.

Next: Chapter Five-The Nightmare

Till then, JLaLa


	5. Chapter Five: The Nightmare

Thank you so much for your support and feedback!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Five: The Nightmare**_

"I told Prim everything," Katniss said, "…about my Mom, Cray, the kids—and about us." She met his eyes through the steam of hot water from the bathtub that she sat in. "Are you upset?"

Peeta shook his head, a grim smile on his face. He sat on a small bench next to the tub, still in his work uniform. He arrived home to find Katniss soaking in the tub after checking on Sarah and Prim, who were napping in his sister's room.

"Did you tell her how I punched the wall when the doctors told Gale and me about your injuries?" he asked.

"I did," she replied. "It did help the whole 'She got jumped and robbed by someone' excuse. The doctors were surprised that I didn't want police involved, though." Katniss folded her arms on the ledge of the tub, her chin resting on her forearms. She looked up at Peeta. "I feel different…freer."

"You look beautiful," Peeta said softly, his deep blue eyes boring into hers.

She almost didn't hear the words, but his stare was enough to cause a blush to run through her body. Katniss was sure that Peeta could see it through the slightly clear water in the tub.

"I have stretch marks." Her eyes went down to the puckered skin on her abdomen. Katniss was a few sizes down from her pregnancy weight but her once-smooth stomach would never be the same. "It's not nice."

"I have stretch marks," Peeta offered with a smile.

She raised a brow at him. "Where?"

He stood up and slowly unbuttoned his shirt revealing a firm chest and toned stomach—all unblemished.

Katniss scowled, her fingers swishing to toss water at him. "I don't see anything!"

Peeta twisted to his side, pointing at a slight mark on his skin right above his beltline. "Right here."

"Just get out of this bathroom," she retorted with a snort. "You're making me feel bad with that tiny mark on your otherwise perfect body!"

"How about I wash your back as an apology?" he offered and shrugged off his shirt. "And, you can tell me more about your talk with Prim."

"You don't need to take off your shirt for me to tell you."

Katniss lay against the back of the tub, not bothering to hide her marked body any longer. She gave birth to a child, survived a beating that would have killed her if it progressed, and lived a majority of her life on her knees—or on her back.

Letting Peeta see her was nothing because he knew what she had been through.

Every mark on her meant something. Some of them had bad meanings: the marks on her knees that never faded, the slight scar on her lower back from Cray's boot. Some of them were good: her stretch marks as her young body accommodated Sarah in her tummy and the small mark on her neck made by Peeta's mouth earlier that morning.

She watched as his hands went to undo his belt and he gave her a smile—the one that she knew was for her and only her.

"But, I will need to remove everything else if I'm going to wash your back." He stopped and met her eyes. "If you want to me to."

Katniss watched him, seeing that behind those usually sure eyes was a glimmer of nervousness. She understood it—for Peeta never wanted to rush or push her.

She drove their relationship.

After a moment, Katniss sat up and moved her body forward, leaving the space behind her open.

She gave him a smile. "Come in, my friend."

* * *

><p>"This is a pretty cool view," Prim said as she looked out the window of Gale's office. "It must be good to be the boss."<p>

"I share this office with three other people," Gale said as he held Sarah in his arms. "So, it's good to be the boss—four days a week."

The baby looked up at him curiously, until he tickled her chin and she gave him a gummy smile. Prim watched the two, letting their niece enjoy her Uncle's company.

Prim wondered if she was as cheerful when she was a baby.

Not that Peeta would exactly tell her; she wasn't mad at her brother's reservedness. From what Katniss had told her, it had taken half of her pregnancy for Peeta to even tell her about his mother—and about her.

However when Katniss told her this, it only made Prim wonder even more. Like, why had it taken so long for him to find her?

"You look like Peeta when you do that," Gale suddenly said.

Prim shook herself out of her reverie. "Do what?"

"Stare," Gale said with a smirk. "Your brother does that sometimes—when he stares at my sister. Then, I want to punch him in the face."

"Do you want to punch me?" Prim responded. She joined him, sitting in the chair across from his. Sarah turned hearing her voice and let out a whine. Her arms went to take the little girl from Gale's arms. Adjusting herself, she looked up to find Gale's steel eyes watching her. "Now, you're staring."

"It's just that…" His eyes went to the floor before going to her and Sarah once more. "…this is kind of nice; you visiting me and all. It's almost as if you like me or something."

Prim tried not to smile. "Don't make me punch you."

There was a knock on the door and a middle-aged man with a thick mustache stuck his head through the opening.

"Hey boss," the guy greeted Gale in a heavy Spanish accent. "Mr. Odair says that he's finished with inventory whenever you want to see him." The man looked to her and Sarah. "This your wife and baby? Nice looking family." He nodded at Prim. "Have a good visit, Mrs. Everdeen."

The man closed the door before she could react.

She turned to Gale who was trying not to laugh at her expression.

"NOT FUNNY! I think I will punch you now!" Her free arm reached out to sock Gale, though it didn't affect him as he laughed at her indignation. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"He was gone before I could, _Mrs_. Everdeen," Gale responded with a smirk. He straightened himself and took a deep breath. "That was hilarious." Prim glared at him and he put his hands up in surrender. "Don't be mad, Prim. It was just a simple mistake."

She stood up, getting ready to put Sarah into the baby carrier strapped to her chest. "I'm going."

"I'm sorry!" Gale jumped up and went to her. "Don't—please."

Prim met his upset eyes. "Why?"

"Because I like that you're here," he responded after a moment. "I think the best part of my day was seeing you walk into the building."

His hands went to her shoulders. She wasn't sure if it was him or her, but the sudden nervous pounding at their closeness caused a warmth to spread through her.

It wasn't exactly an unwelcomed feeling.

Oh boy—she was in trouble.

"Stay." His grey eyes pleaded with her. "I'll drive you and Sarah home after I finish talking to Finnick about inventory."

After a moment, she gave in and sat back down. "Fine."

Gale nodded with a relieved breath and went back to his desk. Picking up the phone, he dialed and spoke briefly to the person on the other line.

"I asked Finnick to come up here," he told her after he hung up. "That way you can avoid the other guys."

"Thanks." Prim took Sarah out of the carrier to sit her back on her lap. She could see that Gale was hurt. "It's not you." His eyes went to her. "You're not the reason that I'm like this."

"Then who is?" he countered.

There was a knock on the door and a handsome, bronze-haired boy entered the room.

"Prim, right?" He gave her a bright smile as he closed the door behind him. "I'm Finnick." The boy sat next to her and his eyes went to Sarah. "This is Katniss' baby, right?"

"Yeah," she replied. "Her name is Sarah."

"She's a looker," Finnick remarked as he stared at her wide-eyed niece. "I'll have to tell Annie and Madge about her. Better yet—let me get a picture of you two."

He reached out to take his phone from his pocket—and Prim's insides froze.

She hated cameras.

"You don't have to do that! Maybe you can just invite them to my house," Prim said to stop him. "I know that Katniss must miss them."

"That's really nice of you," Finnick said and turned to Gale with dancing green eyes. "So, I guess I can tell the guys downstairs that not only is Señora Everdeen pretty—she's very nice, too."

Gale put his head down on his desk in humiliation.

"It's okay if you want to leave now," he told her in a muffled voice.

She reached over to place a hand over his.

"No." Gale lifted his head, just enough to meet her eyes and she gave him a smile. "I think I'll stay."

* * *

><p>"<em>You're gorgeous, you know that right?" His hand went under her dress as his other one stayed firmly on top of her mouth. "But, you're a fucking tease, too."<em>

_Prim squirmed struggling to push herself away from his heavy body. Behind the door, she could hear the sound of laughter and the hard pounding of the bass from the stereo in his living room. _

"_Come on, sweetheart," he whispered. "Open up for me." _

_Prim twisted her legs, locking the hand in-between them, and he yelped in pain._

_His once-handsome face contorted into a sneer. "You little bitch…you're going to get it!"_

_There was a knock on the door and quickly someone else entered the room. _

_She heard click of the lock and Prim felt faint at the sound. _

_This was actually happening. _

"_The camera's ready," the other person suddenly said, his familiar voice quiet and shaking with guilt._

_She could hear the beep of the camera._

"_Now, be a good girl." He pinched her thigh harshly and she cried out from behind his hand. "Make it look good for the camera."_

"AHHH!" Prim shot up and looked out into the darkness.

She couldn't breathe…she couldn't breathe…

The door burst open and Katniss was rushing over to her. Peeta followed behind, stopping at the doorway as the light from the hallway flooded her room with a harsh yellow hue.

"Prim—LOOK AT ME!" Katniss took her face in her hands. "IT'S NOT REAL!"

"IT WAS REAL!" Prim screamed in response. "It was all real!" She wavered for a moment, unable to hold herself up. "Even if they didn't think so…"

"Who, sweetheart?" Katniss asked quietly.

Prim couldn't respond. She wouldn't respond. Her time with them was tenuous and maybe after they knew the truth, they'd hate her.

Everyone else did once they found out—except for Rue who had stuck by her.

And, she had done the best thing she could do to protect her friend—Prim had left.

She wasn't about to leave again.

Lying back down, Prim curled into her blankets and turned away from her friend. "No one."

"What can we do?" Katniss asked her quietly.

"Nothing." She bit her lip to stop the tears. There was a shift at the bottom corner of her bed and she knew that Peeta was there, too.

Prim squeezed her eyes shut so she didn't have to look at them; the horrible darkness overwhelmed her.

"There's nothing that you can do."

* * *

><p>"I'm not doing it anymore," Katniss told him over breakfast. "I've told you this before!"<p>

"Seriously Katniss," Peeta replied in a tired voice. "I heard what you said." He looked over to where she was breastfeeding their daughter. "I just don't know how to talk to her."

"You do," she said simply. "You're just afraid." Katniss gave him a sad smile. "It's been two days. Have you seen her?"

Peeta didn't need to.

The image of Prim's nightmare-ridden face had kept him up these past two nights. So instead of sleeping, he stayed up and held Sarah, waiting to see if Prim would cry out again.

Because he told himself that the next time it would happen—he would be the _only_ one to come downstairs.

"Good morning…or something," Prim mumbled as she walked into the kitchen. She pulled up a chair next to Peeta. "What's going on today?"

"Well, I was thinking that we should enroll you in school," Peeta suggested.

Her eyes widened for a moment at his suggestion before Prim acquiesced. "Okay, fine." She stood up again and Peeta noticed the shakiness of her limbs. "I'll go get ready."

Prim disappeared out into the hallway once more.

Katniss reached out to squeeze his hand. "It'll get better."

Peeta kissed the top of hers. "I hope so."

* * *

><p>Prim looked down at her hands, ignoring the two girls sitting close to her. They stared at her, then at Peeta who was filling out her admittance forms.<p>

He had asked her if she wanted to fill out the form herself, but a chortle from the dark-haired girl, two seats away, made her hands shake. The other girl, a plain-looking blonde, gave Prim a sympathetic smile before she shook her head and pushed the clipboard to Peeta.

"Do I have to go?" she suddenly asked her brother. "Can't I just be home-schooled or get my GED like Katniss?

Peeta looked to her, placing the clipboard in the empty chair next to him.

"You can," he said after a moment. "But, you shouldn't be stuck at home. Katniss isn't at home by choice. She is there because we have a child that needs to be taken care of." His hand went carefully to her shoulder as he gave her a tentative smile. "And, you should have friends, Prim. You're too great a girl to be hidden away."

She couldn't help but chuckle at his words. "'A great girl?'"

"You know what I mean," Peeta muttered, a small smile on his face. "Just give it a try. I know I shouldn't be the person who insists that you go—being as I'm_ so_ social—but I think you would do great." He picked up the clipboard again. "So, what was your GPA at your last high school?"

"Here." She took the clipboard from Peeta. "I should be the one doing this."

* * *

><p>"<em>You were supposed to be with me!" His desperate eyes stared down at her. "I've always wanted you, Prim…" <em>

_He wept as he moved against her, his hand thick on her mouth. _

_It hurt even worse because it was him. He was supposed to her friend—not this monster on top of her, crying and grunting as he moved inside. _

_The rough tulle of her skirt scratched her legs at his erratic movements. She found herself thinking about how upset Rue would be that she ruined her mother's dress._

"_You shouldn't have kissed him," he cried against her. "He knew that I wanted you—and he took you. You let him—you stupid idiot!"_

_Then, the tears came once more—as did the pain of the thrusting._

"_You're mine!" His hand fell from her mouth and she looked up at the crazed blue eyes. "SAY IT!"_

_Prim wasn't about to go down without a fight. "NO!"_

"NO!" Her eyes opened to a familiar blue and instinctually her hands balled into fists to fight. One hand made contact and it stung at the hardness of meeting bone. "STAY AWAY FROM ME, M—"

"PRIM!" It was Peeta, his hands on her wrists to stop her from pummeling him further. "IT WAS JUST A DREAM!"

"IT WASN'T A DREAM!" Prim met his eyes; her sobs erupting out of her as she saw the anguish on her brother's face. "It was all real! Why did you let it happen?"

"Let what happen?" Peeta asked softly. "Look at me. Whatever happened to you—I'm going to be here. I'm sorry that I wasn't before—but I'm here now."

"Why Peeta?" she cried, her face hot from the endless stream of tears. "Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you want me? What made me so horrible that my own family didn't want me?"

She didn't want to say what was really running through her head.

Maybe if they had found her sooner, _it _wouldn't have happened.

"Prim, we always wanted you," Peeta told her.

"Then, why?" she pleaded, her lips trembling. "You have to answer me, Peeta—or I might just go crazy."

Taking a shaky gulp of air, Prim sat back against her headboard and her brother reached out to brush back her hair, his eyes roving her face in sadness.

"You look so much like Mom," he said after a moment and sighed. "I think it's time that I tell you about her."

* * *

><p>Yes, the next chapter will be Peeta's past chapter—starting from his childhood and up until about a few months before Prim arrives.<p>

We will get to meet Sarah, too.

Can anyone guess who the two girls in the office were?

Also, while this was originally outlined at ten chapters, I'm thinking that it might not be. The old fic that it was based on wasn't as detailed as this.

I got a new job at a non-profit—and I'm really excited! And, it's part-time so I don't think it will affect my writing schedule too much. So don't y'all worry!

As always—hellos, reviews, and comments are appreciated on Tumblr, FF, and AO3.

Next, Chapter Six: Peeta

-JLaLa


	6. Chapter Six: Peeta

Thank you for your feedback, favorites, follows and kudos! You're awesome!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

Please bear with me—this is a strange layout for a chapter since a countdown to present time. Also, the POV is skewed since this is Peeta telling Prim about his childhood in his adult mindset.

There will also be a bit of Sarah's POV in here, too.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Six: Peeta**_

_Seventeen Years Ago…_

"Peeta, do you feel that?" His mother smiled gently at him as her hand reached for his. She placed it on her burgeoning stomach. "Do you feel Prim's heartbeat? That womp-womp?"

"Baby?" He was only three, barely aware of what his mother talked about. However, under his hand he thought he felt the slight thumping of a little heart. "Oh…"

"You're making him soft," his father grumbled from where he sat on their couch. "Peeta's already such a weakling."

His mother pulled him close. "He's only a child, Richard." She glared at the man in front of her. "You don't even know him."

"I know that he's a burden," Richard responded. Tall, heavy, and gruff—his father was not like the other daddies in pre-school. He didn't pick Peeta up or lift him into the air. In fact, his father pretended like he was an invisible.

So Peeta tried hard to never be noticed because it was the only thing that seem to please his father.

"And, so is the next one—and it's a girl," his father continued.

"I love little girls," Sarah told him. "Prim is going to be brilliant, smart, and strong—just like Peeta." She stood up slowly, her breath slightly labored. Turning to Peeta, she held out her hand. "Let's go make lunch, sweetheart."

"Better be a good one," her husband grumbled. "I can't stand all the crap that we've been eating lately."

"You're not working, so you'll eat what we have," his mother replied, her blue eyes unafraid.

She was never afraid.

Because, Richard never did anything. He just sat on the couch, pretending to read the job listings, and actually reading the sports scores to see if he had won any cash.

That's how they lost the last of their savings—fifty-thousand dollars gone because Richard had picked the wrong football team. It was the last bit of money that Sarah had from her parents.

At least the house was paid off.

Together, Peeta and his mother went to the kitchen and she sat down tiredly. He approached her carefully and scooted himself onto her lap. Sometimes, Sarah got tired—too tired and Peeta would just sit with her until she felt better.

"Peeta," his mother began. "Will you promise me something?"

He nodded as he looked up at her sad, pallid face. He would do anything for her.

"Promise to protect Prim," Sarah said. "No matter what happens, take care of her and love her. You're her big brother, sweetheart. She will always look to you for help or advice. And, you'll be there for her as she grows up—you'll watch her walk her first steps and say her first words. You'll be there when she goes on her first date and gets her heart broken for the first time. Just be her guide—she will trust you. Because until she finds the man she will marry, you will be the one man she'll love above the rest."

"Promise," Peeta said though he had no idea what it meant.

His mother's breath began to get heavy and she put a hand to her chest, her face turning grey.

"Peeta—" Her call came out choked. "You remember what I said to do? In case this happened?"

He nodded before going to the phone on the wall. Pulling out the step stool that was under it, Peeta stepped up and dialed the first number.

He heard a woman's voice on the other end of the line. "9-1-1 emergency?"

"Mommy needs help," he told the person before saying his address as Sarah had taught him.

After Peeta hung up, he pulled up the seat next to his mother, who had laid her head on the table and waited until he heard the sound of knocking on the door.

* * *

><p><em>Three Days Later…<em>

Sae was their neighbor. She lived on the bottom floor of their duplex and was the only other person that Peeta would let hold his hand besides his mother.

"Are you excited, Peeta?" Sae asked him with a soft smile. "You have a little sister now."

He nodded as they walked through the hospital hallway. "Prim."

"That's right," Sae said as they made a turn. She knocked on the first door before they walked into the room. "Let's go and meet your little sister."

He rushed into the room and was immediately greeted by his mother's bright smile. She was holding a pink bundle as she sat in a chair next to her bed.

"Peeta!" she breathed out happily. "Come here and meet your sister."

Tentatively, Peeta approached and looked at the small pale face, pink lips, and fluff of yellow hair. He met his mother's happy smile as she watched them.

He looked at the wrapped baby again, his hand reaching to touch her soft skin. "Prim?"

"Prim," his mother repeated proudly.

"Sarah," Sae said as she approached them. "They still have you using the respirator?"

"Yes, but it's fine." She pushed the clear nostril plugs slightly off her nose. "It was a difficult labor but I'll be okay."

Sae looked out into the empty hallway. "I don't suppose Richard will be visiting."

"Doesn't matter," his mother replied. "He got what he wanted out of this marriage. Here are his two children as he demanded—and he's still not happy." She pressed a kiss to Peeta's head and then kissed the top of Prim's. "I have them and that's all that matters."

"I don't think that I'll ever understand your marriage," Sae said to his mother.

"Our parents were business partners—and I did what I was told," Sarah told her simply. "Then, his parents died and he made very bad financial decisions." She sat back with Prim in her arms as Peeta took the little space left against her to lay his head on her chest. "My parents tried to help out, but then my Mama got sick and then Dad went right after her. Peeta was the only one at the time."

"Now what?" Sae asked. "You know your condition, Sarah—and your husband isn't exactly coming to the hospital to settle the bill."

His mother exhaled loudly. "I will figure it out." She put an arm around Peeta to pull him closer. "For now, let me just enjoy my babies."

* * *

><p><em>One Week Later…<em>

"Your mama is sick," Richard told him. "And your sister is gone." The man glared down at Peeta as he clung to the stuffed duck that he was supposed to give to his newborn sister, tears filling his eyes. "Toughen up, boy! No crying! Be quiet or you'll kill your mama!"

His words only made Peeta cry harder.

"STOP THAT!"

The hit came hard and stung his cheek badly—but, it had an effect.

He was silent.

* * *

><p>"MY DAUGHTER!" Peeta awoke to the sound of his mother's cries and his heart leapt—she was finally home. "WHERE IS SHE?"<p>

Peeta opened the door quickly and rushed upstairs to his parents' bedroom. His mother was sitting in her bed, pale and pretty, but her face was streaked with tears.

"I did what was needed," his father told Sarah. His blue eyes were unapologetic. "We paid off the hospital with that money."

"You did it without my consent!" Sarah stood up, suddenly strong. "You sold my daughter off while I was unconscious!" She went to her husband, her eyes manic. "YOU ARE A MONSTER AND A CRIMINAL!"

"You consented—here." Her husband pulled out a paper from his jacket pocket. "Your signature is right there. It's already done, Sarah. She is with a family who can take care of her and we got a hefty sum to pay off our debts."

Sarah read through the contract: fifty-thousand for their daughter—a petty sum given to a petty man.

Her eyes went to her supposed signature and they narrowed seeing it.

"I've seen a forged signature before," she hissed at the man. "You did this." Sarah charged at him. "GET MY DAUGHTER BACK!"

"It was a private adoption—all papers are confidential until she reaches the age of eighteen."

Peeta watched his mother choke back a sob. "My baby…you took my Prim from me…" Her eyes went back to her husband. "Get out."

Richard almost smirked at her anger. "What?"

"I said—GET OUT!" Sarah screamed. "I HATE YOU! I NEVER WANTED TO MARRY YOU! IT WAS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE!" She landed a hard slap to her husband's face. "GET OUT OF HERE!"

Peeta's father didn't even look at him before he walked down the stairs and out the door.

It didn't matter—his mother needed him.

Slowly, Peeta walked over to her. She was crouched on the bed, sobbing into her hands; the crumpled contract rested next to her. He picked it up seeing nothing but black mish-mash.

"Mommy?" Sarah looked up, her blue eyes full of tears. He offered her his biggest smile. "I'll take care of you."

His mother smiled at him before pulling him close. "I know, baby. You're a good boy."

"Where's Prim?" he asked her.

Sarah's eyes filled and Peeta reached to brush a tear from his mother's cheek.

"I don't know," she said in a choked voice. "But, we'll search for her and we will get her back." His mother gave him a smile. "We will be a family again."

* * *

><p><em>Seven Years Ago…<em>

"Thank you for coming in, Mrs. Mellark," Principal Latier said to his mother. "I'm sorry that we're meeting under such circumstances."

His mother shook the man's hand before turning to him, a look of worry on her face.

She lifted the ice pack from his face to reveal a swollen eye. "Are you okay, baby?" Peeta nodded and his mother turned to the principal. "Who did this to my son?"

"Another boy in the class," Principal Latier informed her. "He has already been suspended. Will your husband be joining us?"

"We haven't seen Peeta's father in ten years," Sarah responded tersely. "And, we recently got word that he passed away. It's been difficult on my son."

The man in front of them nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry to hear that, Mrs. Mellark. It can be very tough on a thirteen-year-old boy to lose the person who is supposed to be the dominant male figure in his life."

"We have dealt," his mother said stiffly. "Is my son being punished for this?"

Principal Latier shook his head. "No, he isn't," he continued. "However, I've talked with Peeta's teacher and she's noted that Peeta lacks some communication skills. She reports that he doesn't participate in class nor does he interact with the other students."

"Are his grades being affected?" Sarah asked defensively.

"No, ma'am," Principal Latier assured her. "He's doing very well. However, it does raise issues that he seems so withdrawn from everyone else." The man turned to him. "Peeta, is there a reason that you don't feel the need to talk to anyone else in the class?"

"No, sir," Peeta replied in his slightly hoarse voice. He talked very little and the onset of puberty had left a slight crack in his voice.

"He answered your question," his mother told the man. "I don't feel like I should push my son to be popular in school. I'm a single mother and I work five days a week as a paralegal. So, I'm not exactly baking brownies for the PTA meetings to gain popularity either. But, I know my son and I've raised him to be a good man. He has no issues at home and we talk all the time. He helps out his elderly neighbor every Saturday and we go to church on Sundays. So, please don't push him to be what you would consider 'normal'."

Principal Latier sighed. "I understand, and if it had not been for this fight, I'm sure that we would not be having this conversation." He reached into his pocket and held out a card to Sarah. "However, let's be reassured that there is no escalation of this issue. This is the name of a behavioral therapist that I used to work with. He's a very nice man and I think that Peeta will get a friend out of him."

His mother took the card, her hand shaky. "We'll look into it."

"I'd like to tell Peeta's teacher that he is going so that she doesn't feel the need to report him once more," the man said before turning to Peeta. He gave him a smile. "You can go home for the rest of the day and nurse that shiner."

"I-I apologize, sir," Peeta stuttered out.

The man shook his head. "I have a feeling that you'll be okay," he told Peeta. "Cinna is a good person to talk to and I think you'll like him."

* * *

><p>"Do you want to tell me what happened, teenager?" His mother asked as they drove away from his middle school. She ruffled his hair affectionately. "I never took you as the fighting type."<p>

"Brutus is a jerk," Peeta muttered. "He took this painting that I made and tried to claim it as his!"

"Wow…he really does sound like a jerk," Sarah replied. She looked over at him curiously. "Did you at least get him back?"

Peeta smirked. "His jaw is busted."

"Oh, boy—raising you has been very interesting so far." Sarah looked forward. "Is this about your father? I know that you said that you didn't want to go to the funeral but maybe it would've helped."

"No." He turned to his mother. "I hate him. He left us and he took Prim away."

Sarah sighed. "I feel you on that," she said sympathetically. "And, every avenue I've looked into with finding Prim has been fruitless. The adoption system is locked and even with my capabilities in my office I'm hitting brick walls."

"We're going to find Prim," Peeta assured her and gave her a small smile. "She's waiting for us. I know it."

"Sometimes I swear I hear her crying for us," his mother said and he could see the tears beginning to film in her eyes. "You think that she's angry at us? Does she even know that she's adopted?"

"Maybe not now," he replied. "But, maybe her parents will tell her one day—and maybe she'll want to find us. Until then, we'll just keep going."

"That's my boy," Sarah said with a smile. "Do you want to get some ice cream or something?"

"Sure. I'll pay." Peeta reached into his pocket and pulled out a five dollar bill. "Sae gave me some money for cleaning out her living room."

"Okay," his mother agreed and made a turn to their favorite ice cream place down the street from their home. "But, you know that no matter how much you bribe me, you'll still have to see this therapist."

"Shoot." He offered her his biggest smile. "What if I let you get sprinkles?"

* * *

><p>"Hello Peeta," the man welcomed him with a gentle smile. He held his hand out for Peeta to shake and he tentatively shook it. "I'm Cinna. Mr. Latier was my principal when I was your age and recommended that we meet."<p>

"What is this place?" Peeta asked curiously. "It looks like an orphanage."

The main building looked like a large mansion with its dual staircase at the entrance and chandelier over the main reception area. However, Cinna had taken him outside and he looked around to see an array of mini-houses that matched the large terra-cotta colored building behind them.

Children walked around in group lines while in the far corner of the yard were some basketball courts where he saw a group of boys playing.

"It was one before," Cinna said. "I lived here when it was. Now, it's a facility for children who might need some help for a bit. Some of the kids go to public school and come here for appointments while some go to public school and live here. And, some even go to school here and live here."

"You lived here?" Peeta looked around. It seemed like a nice enough place though he could see that some of the kids didn't seem to enjoy being outside by the pouts on their faces.

"Yes." Cinna gave him a wide, open smile. The man was tall; chocolate skinned with dark, kind eyes. He was dressed in a grey sweater and caramel corduroys. "I didn't know my parents and was in the system for a long time. But, I found my place here. Went to school and then college where I majored in Behavioral Sciences. I wanted to come back here because I wanted to help kids who were like me."

"Oh," Peeta said, suddenly unsure of what to say. "Do you ever wonder about your birth parents?"

It came out without him thinking about his words. But, looking around and seeing all the children made him think of Prim. He wondered if it was better that she was given away for adoption instead of being left at some orphanage.

"I did," Cinna told him. "I even met my mother before she died. She was very heavily into drugs when she had me and in retrospect, it was better that I lived here." The man looked at Peeta curiously. "Why?"

"My sister was given away by my father." Peeta didn't know why he was being so open to Cinna, but something instinctively told him to trust the man. "My Mom was sick after she gave birth to her and my Dad took advantage of that. He forged her signature on the consent form. The day my Mom found out was the day that she kicked him out of the house."

They sat down on a bench close to the main building.

"So you and your mother have spent a lot of time looking for her?" Cinna asked.

"Mom, mostly," Peeta answered. "She's petitioned for Prim's paperwork and went on internet searches. She's even scanned some message boards for kids who are searching for their birth parents—but nothing. Prim is only ten and we're not even sure if she even knows that she's adopted."

"Prim?" Cinna repeated.

"That's her name," Peeta said. "Primrose. At least, that_ was_ her name."

"You've been through a lot, Peeta," Cinna remarked. "But, you have a good head on your shoulders."

Peeta looked at him warily. "So, you don't think anything is wrong with me?"

"Not at all. In fact, I think you know who you are and are set in your ways," the man told him. "It's not something that you see in a lot of thirteen-year-olds. And, I can see how that can throw a lot of grown-ups off. So, you don't like to talk a lot? That's not a big deal. It's only a big deal because some people don't want to understand what is different."

"You're okay, Cinna," Peeta told him.

"You're a pretty cool kid, Peeta," Cinna replied. "Don't let anyone tell you any different."

* * *

><p><em>Four Years Ago…<em>

"Have a good night, Sarah!" Enobaria, Mr. Snow's assistant called out as she passed her office. "You coming out for drinks tonight?"

Sarah shook her head from where she sat behind her desk.

"It's a special occasion. Going out with Peeta." Her eyes went to Peeta's junior year photo; he was all messy hair and a shy smile. Peeta went to an art school outside the city and was going through his grungy artist phase.

It meant he never cleaned his room and always had a little bit of chin scruff.

"Well, we'll miss you!" Enobaria said before giving Sarah a final wave.

She was too old to be going out with the firm's Executive Assistants. All of them were young and pretty while she was getting to the latter part of her forties with one child close to graduating and the other one still missing.

There wasn't a day when she didn't think of Prim. She could still remember that distinct smell of baby powder and daisies that seemed to surround her daughter. Did Prim still smell that way?

The beep on her computer pulled her from her thoughts. Sarah looked to the screen at the sender and her eyes widened as she quickly reached for her mouse to click open the e-mail. She scanned the message before her eyes zeroed in on a name: _Effie Crane née Trinket_.

"Oh my God," she breathed. "Finally."

Jumping from her seat, Sarah began to throw everything into her bag. She still had to head over to the bakery and pick up Peeta's favorite mango cake from Red Ribbon, a Filipino bakery that specialized in them.

It was happening—they finally had a lead on Prim.

Walking to the elevator she waved at Caesar, one of her co-workers. He grinned, his bright teeth illuminated by his tanned skin.

"Hey sweetheart," he greeted her. "Working late tonight?"

"Yeah," Sarah replied as they entered the elevator and she took a long breath. Her heart was beating hard from her excitement—it was almost overwhelming. "D-Did you have a good time in Cabo?"

"Honey, I don't even remember half of Cabo—I was so boozed up by the pool and very much in Margaritaville."

"Damn—that actually sounds kind of nice right now," Sarah replied as they descended to the lobby. "It's kind of hot in here."

She was sweating like crazy and her heart was suddenly beating loudly in her ears.

"Sarah?" Caesar's voice was suddenly cloudy. "What's wrong?"

The elevator opened and she rushed out before landing on her knees.

"I can't breathe." Sarah could faintly hear Caesar calling out for help. "I can't breathe…"

Then, there was darkness.

* * *

><p>Peeta looked down the hospital hallway to where Cinna was speaking to his mother's doctor before entering her room. It was dimly lit and he remembered the last time that they were ever in a hospital- the day that Prim was born.<p>

This time, however, his mother had a private room and had the best doctors, but something told him that the accommodations would be of no use.

His mother slept peacefully, her heart rate finally normal after her episode. Sitting next to her bed, he reached over to place his hand over hers. It felt so small under his large hand and long fingers.

"I couldn't pick up your cake." Peeta's eyes went to his mother, who was awake and smiling gently at him. "I'm sorry, sweetheart."

"It's okay," he assured her. "We'll have mango cake another day."

"But, it's not every day that you celebrate your sixteenth birthday," Sarah told him. "You're definitely getting a car now."

"Something with tinted windows and a sound system that you can hear from down the street," Peeta replied. The smile fell from his lips. "Do you want to tell me what's going on now?"

"My heart has been weak for long time," his mother finally admitted. "The doctors were against me having another child but Prim was already on the way—and there was no chance in hell that I was getting rid of her." She took a drawn-out breath. "I guess it caught up with me."

"What happens now?" he asked, almost afraid to hear the answer. His mouth trembled and tears filled his eyes. "I don't know what to do, Mom."

Sarah squeezed his hand. "You're going to stand up and tell the doctors that I want to be released."

Peeta stood up and looked around at the machines connected to her: the respirator, the vitals machine, the IV—she needed them. "But—"

"But nothing—I'm not going to rot away in a hospital bed," Sarah insisted. "I still have things to do. You have college applications to fill out and a chance for early graduation that we need to look into. Also, there is still Prim—" She took in a shaky breath. "I finally found a lead, Peeta."

"You did?" he asked.

His mother nodded. "I did," she declared. "Now go on and tell Cinna that I want to talk to him while you speak to my doctor."

"Alright." Peeta pressed a quick kiss to her forehead. "I'll be right back."

Sarah reached over to cup his cheek. "Happy Birthday, Peeta." She looked over his serious face. "Don't worry, love. Everything will be okay. You'll see."

* * *

><p><em>Three Years Ago…<em>

Those were slow, lonely days for Peeta.

His mother's condition worsened through the passing months and he suddenly rushed through his courses in order to graduate a year earlier than he was supposed to. His college applications were long forgotten—there was no reason to fill them out.

Sarah was running on borrowed time and he needed to be with her.

Cinna was a great help to them. In-between his time as a therapist, he was often there to lend a helping hand out to Peeta or just be there to talk. He had become Peeta's mentor of sorts and a great friend to Sarah.

That year, he turned seventeen.

It was a small party; mango cake by his mother's bedside and presents from Cinna and Sarah. Sae, who had moved to Florida to be with her children, sent him a hefty check and a decorated card made by her grandkids. Cinna's present had been a beautiful leather-bound sketch book and some drawing pencils—to help with his craft.

"Happy Birthday, Peeta," his mother rasped as she handed him her present. "It's a little sappy, but mothers should give their kids sappy presents every once in a blue moon."

Carefully, Peeta unwrapped his present to reveal a jewelry box. Lifting its lid, he found a long, rectangular pendant on a chain.

"It's actually a locket," his mother explained. She took it from his hands and opened it from the middle. "You see? Here is our first picture." Her eyes went to the small photo of her holding his infant self. "You can also put pictures on each side of this one."

"Of who?" he asked with a small smile.

"I don't know," Sarah said off-handedly. "Your wife or your children—whoever…"

Peeta grinned at her. "You trying to marry me off?"

"Why not, kid?" Cinna, who had been sitting next to him, joked. "I know a lot of chicks who would dig you—the strong, silent type."

"I'm not sure that I want him with any of the girls that you might hang out with, Cinna," his mother scolded with a smile. "A lot of style, but not a lot of substance."

"I can't help it if they're the ones that I attract," his friend replied with an easy grin. "Actually, I think Peeta is going to end up with a girl very similar to you—nurturing, headstrong, and independent. She'll know how to handle him and get him out of his shell."

"Can you two not talk about me like I'm not here?" Peeta asked, his cheeks red. "I'm perfectly capable of finding my own girl."

"I'm sure you are," Cinna told him before standing up. "I've got a standing session that I have to get to." He went to kiss Sarah on the cheek. "Always nice to see you up and about, Miss Sarah." He went to Peeta and pulled him into a hug. "Happy birthday, Peeta. One more year, and you're an official adult."

"Yay," Peeta intoned. "Then, I'll have to get a real job."

Cinna waved before walking out the door and down the stairs.

Peeta looked over to his mother. "How are you feeling today?"

"I'm good," she said. "Today, I'm actually sitting up."

There were days when Sarah would just sleep. He often woke up in the middle of the night to check on her—just in case. The medicines on her side table had increased; but they were all there for comfort and to draw out her time a little longer.

"Hey, Peeta." His mother gazed at him. "What do you want for your next birthday?"

"I don't know," he replied. "It seems very far away."

"There must be something," Sarah persisted. "Think of what your life will be a year from now—what would you possibly need?"

Peeta stared at her pale face, sunken eyes, and thin skin. The lump in his throat almost felt impossible to swallow, but he had to.

He couldn't let her see him cry.

"Next year?" Peeta met her eyes. "I don't want to be alone."

Her face fell and her hand reached for his. "I will try very hard to make sure that doesn't happen. And, maybe it won't happen next year," Sarah told him, her voice thick with tears. "But one day, she'll come and you'll know that I sent her."

"I'm scared, Mom," he choked out. "I'm scared to be alone." His face began to crumple and his mother was already reaching forward to pull him close as the sobs overtook him. "W-W-What am I going to do?"

Sarah kissed the top of his head and he took in the scent of flowers. "You're going to be patient." She began to rock him slowly to stop his crying. "When it's time, I'll send her to you. And, I promise that you will never be alone again."

* * *

><p><em>Two Years Ago…<em>

Sarah had waited.

She had held out until a week after his eighteenth birthday before finally closing her eyes for the last time.

And, it had been peaceful—with only himself and Cinna by her side.

The funeral was small; just himself, Cinna, and a few of his mother's old work colleagues. Sae had passed on by then, but her children had sent their condolences.

Now, it was only him in his lonely home.

Then, Cinna had broken the news that he had received an invitation to work at a newly founded institution in New York. It was similar to the one that he was working at now but they had invited him to be Director of Community Programs, which would have him focusing on a lot of the inner-city youth.

Peeta understood. Cinna was a fantastic person who deserved the opportunity and he wasn't upset that his friend was leaving. But, he would miss his mentor.

Cinna left six months before his nineteenth birthday.

They frequently sent one another e-mails and his friend constantly asked him when he would be visiting.

At that point, Peeta had gotten his job at Panem Bakery.

Chaff, his manager, made him the delivery man for all local groceries. It was an easy enough job. He would go to a store, set-up the display, and stack the bread onto it. During his weekly visits, he would restock and let the managers know about any new products if they were interested.

It was on a break from one of his deliveries when he decided to check out the small hole-in-the-wall grocery near the border of the city. It was on the top of a hill and a block from a local school. Cinna had told him that he attended the school and used to stop into the grocery to grab sodas.

Walking inside, he looked around the dingy, crowded store. The after-school crowd was milling around him in identical white and dark green uniforms. He was in search of a snack—there wasn't a lot of break time between deliveries, so he had to eat as he drove.

His eyes spotted a small pack of dried mangoes touting the title '_Cebu's Finest_' and he went to grab the pack when—

The laugh, light and musical, caught his ears immediately; the sound of it traveled down his spine in a shiver of lively excitement.

He looked around the grocery searching for it when his eyes went to the counter.

And, there she was.

Long raven hair braided to the side and olive-skinned, the girl was perched on a seat behind the counter ringing the kids up as she laughed at one of their jokes.

His mother had been right.

One day, she would come and something would tell him that his mother had sent her.

The girl's laugh—sweet, solid, and exuberant—reminded him of Sarah's.

Her laugh told him that he wasn't alone.

Without a thought, Peeta went towards the back and found an open door with an 'Office' sticker stuck above it.

Knocking against the archway, the dark-haired man sitting at the desk looked up. "Can I help you?"

"I'm Peeta Mellark from Panem Bakery," he began. "I wanted to drop of my card if you were ever interested in another bread distributor…"

* * *

><p><em>Ten Months Ago…<em>

He was going to be a father.

Somewhere inside Katniss, their child was growing. It had all happened so fast.

Just four months ago, he had officially met Katniss. That first time that Peeta had seen her had left him so tongue-tied and he knew that he wouldn't have been able to get two words out.

However that next time, he had been prepared and managed to engage in an actual conversation.

Katniss was even more beautiful up close. She had entrancing smoky eyes, full of youth. Yet, there was so much wisdom in them—as if she had lived a thousand lives before this one.

And, it had been easy to talk to her. Surprising since saying five words was such a rare feat for him.

She was doing her homework when he approached her counter—invisible numbers. While he wasn't very good with words, the algebraic subject had been a surprisingly easy one for him when he was in school.

Her eyes had gone to his bag of dried mangoes that he had purchased during their conversation. He had taken to them after that first time that he had seen her. The snack had also brought back memories of eating mango cakes with his mother.

Apparently, Katniss liked dried mangoes too.

Peeta had spent the rest of the week with her on his mind. He couldn't sleep, so occupied by her laugh in his ear and her smile behind his eyelids.

He wasn't sure what it was or if she had even felt the same draw that he had.

Yet, there had been that moment by his truck.

She had run out of the store to give him the packet of mangoes that he had carelessly left in Haymitch's office. He could still remember the memory of them wrapped in the orange of the sunset, her hair flowing in the slight breeze and the skirt of her yellow dress dancing against her richly-colored legs.

A sudden wind had hit them covering her pretty face with her hair and his hand reached out to tuck some of it behind her ear. The slight brush of his hand against her ear had electrified him.

For the first time, Peeta felt alive.

After that, everything seemed different; he felt the possibility running through his veins.

Others had noticed, too. Cinna could hear the lightness in his voice during phone their conversations and was delighted that he met a girl.

Chaff had been impressed with Peeta's initiative and promoted him to manager of the Mid-West accounts. He had been given his first assignment the same week that he met Katniss and would be gone for two weeks negotiating a contract in Kansas.

The second time he saw Katniss was after a laundry run at a twenty-four hour Laundromat.

Peeta had heard sobbing coming from an alcove in-between two apartment buildings as he walked to his car, laundry duffle in hand. He was surprised to find that it was Katniss, skin blotchy from her tears and eyes so full of pain that it broke him.

He knew that feeling of helplessness and loneliness—his days had been filled with those two things as his constant companions.

And, when Katniss had gently pressed her lips to his…that was it. He was a goner.

Things had gotten out of hand and Peeta had found himself thrusting into her—not knowing that she was a virgin.

She had urged him, trusted him, and chose him to be her first.

Peeta had been as gentle as he could, kissing her until the aching seemed to fade from her lips, and she was convulsing around him. The singular look of fire in her eyes had been enough for him to come undone, releasing into her welcoming body as he climaxed.

Little did Peeta know what he had done besides taking her virginity.

The third time that he had seen Katniss, his life changed forever.

Peeta had returned from his trip eager to see her. He had been detained because of his success with his Kansas meeting and had been sent to another grocery to persuade them into ordering from his company.

During the trip, Peeta found himself wondering if he should call Katniss to make sure that she was okay. She had assured him, after their tryst, that there was no need for him to worry about her wanting a romantic relationship.

She wasn't that kind of person and neither was he.

At least, Peeta thought he wasn't.

Yet the day after he came home, Peeta found himself rushing over to Haymitch's grocery. It was pathetic and he could admit that. However, Katniss looked happy to see him and had even scribbled her number on some receipt paper for him to take with him.

There was also another little scribble on the paper for him: Katniss was pregnant.

The wind had been knocked out of him as he read the words.

It was the first time that he had ever felt _that_ sort of scared. Peeta had felt scared at certain moments in his life—like the first time his father had ever hit him or the day he had been taken out of his class because his mother had been brought to the ER.

Or, even the day that Sarah died—when he felt that overwhelming fear of being alone in his childhood home for the first time.

This was an 'I'm in charge of a new life' kind of scared.

Katniss was freaked out herself and Peeta, seeing her in that state, had immediately sorted his senses. She was sixteen—he had been unaware of that—and freaked out, which was understandable. They held one another as the news sank into both of their skins. After, he had given her his business card for when she needed him.

He promised himself that things would be different for this child.

The fourth time that he met with Katniss was in a hospital room.

Her older brother Gale had been the one to call—anger and fear in his voice as he informed Peeta that Katniss had been beaten brutally by their stepfather. He could feel the accusation in the boy's voice—why hadn't Peeta been there? Why hadn't he protected her?

Katniss was the mother of his child and it was his duty.

At the hospital, Peeta had met Gale, who shared Katniss' coloring but not her trademark smile.

Well, Peeta wasn't sure since Gale spent a majority of the time glaring at him. The doctor had thankfully come out to go over Katniss' injuries: a badly bruised lower back, a dislocated jaw, and a head contusion that would heal over time.

The baby was fine. He finally let out the breath that he had been holding in. Katniss had covered her stomach and let the rest of her body take the brunt of the injuries.

However, Peeta was angry at himself and had walked out into the back of the hospital where he punched the wall until he was exhausted.

Gale found him in the triage office getting his hand wrapped to tell him that Katniss was awake.

"I told them that you were her boyfriend," Gale said as they walked to the room, stopping in front of her door. "And that you were seventeen." Peeta could see that this was Gale's way of a truce. "She's going to need you much more now."

* * *

><p>That's how he found himself—four months later, helping Katniss clean out the closet in <em>their<em> bedroom.

"Peeta?" she asked as she folded the onesies that she had just washed into a neat stack. "I couldn't reach up into the far back of the closet and there's a box in there. Could you get it?"

"I didn't know anything was up there," Peeta replied breathlessly as he reached up to get the box. He had just cleaned out the old clothes that had once belonged to his father. They were now in garbage bags waiting to be picked up by Salvation Army. "You know this whole cleaning jag? I read about this in the baby book. It's called 'nesting'."

He yanked at the box to pull it to the center of the shelf.

"What do they call this constant horny stage that I'm going through?" Katniss asked, her eyes focused on the piles of onesies still in the basket.

"Heaven," he declared as he stepped down with the box in his arms.

Their eyes met and Katniss' face turned scarlet.

This morning, he had woken up to find her straddling him and already undoing his pajama bottoms.

That part of their relationship had always been the easiest part.

"Very funny," Katniss said. Her eyes went to the box. "What's in it?"

"I don't know." Carefully he removed the top of it. Inside were stacks of folders and notebooks—he remembered them well.

His mother wrote in them whenever she found a clue to Prim's whereabouts.

Prim—she was seventeen now.

Was she alright? Healthy? Happy? His eyes went to Katniss' growing stomach and he realized how he had no other blood besides their little one—and Prim, who he only remembered as a small bundle of blonde hair and milky skin.

He wanted to find her—for his mother and the baby.

And, for himself.

"Peeta?" He looked up to see Katniss kneeling next to him. "You went grey for a moment." Her eyes looked over the stacks of notebooks. "What are these?"

He took a deep breath, his throat suddenly dry. "Did I ever tell you that I had a little sister?"

* * *

><p>"Your mom was diligent," Katniss said as she finished organizing the notebooks. "Everything is dated and she notes if she followed up on the clue."<p>

"But, it got us nowhere," Peeta grumbled.

It was already late into the afternoon and they had halted their closet cleaning after they found the 'Prim' box.

"The internet is more readily available," Katniss offered. "We can do a little researching."

"You think?" he asked as he looked at all the work that his mother had put into her search.

"I do." Katniss crawled over to him, sitting in-between his legs on the floor, and taking his hand. "I think it would be nice if our child had an Aunt who was already passed puberty. Though Allie and Posy would love to babysit." He chuckled softly at her words. "And, I think this is important to you, Peeta."

"What if Prim doesn't want to be found?" he asked. Peeta gazed up at her sweet eyes before looking at their joined hands. "What if we find her—and she hates me?"

"She will love you," Katniss told him, her eyes tender. "You're not difficult to love, Peeta."

Peeta lifted her chin before leaning down to kiss her soft lips. She sighed into his mouth, opening it slightly to let his tongue brush hers.

"I'll take your word for it," he whispered against her mouth as they pulled away.

If Peeta didn't know any better, he might think that he was falling in love with her.

"Is that everything in the box?" Katniss asked.

He reached forward and looked inside. His eyes suddenly caught a small Post-It folded in the corner.

Taking it, Peeta unfolded the piece of paper, a sudden rush spiking down his spine as he read the name on it:

_Effie Crane née Trinket_

* * *

><p><em>Eight Months Ago…<em>

"It's a message board," Katniss explained. "For kids who have been adopted or have been in the system." She handed him the laptop. "I thought that you could maybe write a little message—and maybe we'll get a bite."

Their first clue had been disheartening. Effie Crane had been Prim's adoptive mother along with her husband, Seneca. They owned a home in New Orleans where Prim had lived until she was three. There was some red tape over what had happened to the Cranes but they did know that Effie had died around the same time.

And, Prim had been taken by Child Protective Services.

That part of the search had been much more difficult as they had run into the same barriers that his mother did. No information could be released until Prim was of age and there was still the looming question as to whether or not she still had the name Prim—and, if she wanted to be found.

"What would I write?" His hands danced over the keyboard as he looked to her anxiously. "I'm not good with words." He could feel his worry heighten at the possibilities on what could come of this. He ran a hand through his now-mussed hair. "She's going to think I'm weird."

"You're not weird," Katniss declared. "You're different, but everyone is. If we were all the same—we would be boring. On the other hand, she might be exactly like you. That would be just as endearing to the people who care for you."

"No, not Prim." He gave her a smile. "Prim is probably better than me. I was only three when she was born and can only remember bits. But, I remember thinking that she was going to be special. Even when she was gone—her disappearance changed my family. My mother learned how to yell and she learned to be angry. She stood up to my father—because Prim gave her the strength to want better."

Katniss grinned. "There you go! Write that—write how losing her affected your family, how important it was to your mother that you find her and how your mother would feel if she was found; how you would feel."

After a moment, Peeta nodded. "If she doesn't want to be found, then she won't respond, right?"

"Exactly." Katniss kissed his cheek. "I'm going to start dinner so you can have some privacy." She pushed herself off the bed before going to the door and closing it behind her.

Peeta stared at the blank white screen in front of him. He wasn't sure how his mother would feel if Prim was found, though he was sure that she would be elated.

But, he did know how he would feel.

So, he began to write.

* * *

><p>A week later, Peeta found Katniss waiting for him on the front porch of the house.<p>

"We got a bite," she declared triumphantly.

They had posted his message on twenty or so message boards for kids who had been adopted, in foster care, and in the CPS system. Peeta tried not to get his hopes up as they posted but he could feel the anticipation coursing through his system.

"You're joking," Peeta responded.

"I wouldn't joke about this," Katniss replied as she pulled him up the porch steps. "It's from one of the message boards for kids in foster homes. The person who responded is her foster mother and Prim has been with her and her husband since she was eight."

They went to the kitchen where Katniss had set-up the laptop and he went to sit in front of it immediately to read the message that was under his post:

_Hello Peeta,_

_My name is Maisie Roberts and for nine years, a girl named Prim has been living in my home. She fits your description from what you remember of her—blonde hair, pale skin. Her eyes are blue, by the way._

_Prim is my daughter Rue's best friend and she is a sweet girl. She is quiet, polite and intelligent. Her grades have always been exceptional and though she isn't exactly a social butterfly—she has a wonderful charm that people gravitate to._

_However, I could see that she feels somewhat incomplete. Her life before us had not been easy. She had been privately adopted before and there were circumstances that led her into Child Protective Services at the tender age of three. She was then sent to a series of foster homes until she came to us at the age of eight and has been here ever since._

_Lately, Prim has been upset. Next year, she will be eighteen and is unsure of what she wants. However, I know that she wants to know her family, though she won't admit it. She is too proud and also afraid of what she might find._

_Reading your post brought me to tears and something tells me that this is it—Prim has found the family that she has been secretly wishing for._

_Please reply with your e-mail and we can talk further. Also, I'd like to send a photo of Prim as well._

_Sincerely,_

_Maisie Roberts_

They had done it. They had found her.

He could feel it in his bones, the emotion rising from his throat as he read over the words once more.

"Peeta?" Katniss placed her hand over his. "Why are you crying?"

Peeta couldn't respond, only covering his eyes with his other hand as the sobs escaped him.

* * *

><p>She looked exactly like their mother.<p>

Maisie had sent him Prim's class photo and Peeta felt his throat constrict as he saw the resemblance that she bared to their mother—same heart-shaped face, straight nose, and big, blue eyes that were the exact shade of Sarah's. Her hair however was long, fine, and had a slight wave.

Prim was beautiful.

Katniss had scanned photos of their mother and of him that he had sent back.

Maisie had told him via email that Prim knew nothing of their correspondence and that she was waiting for the right time to tell her. Until then, Prim's foster mother had attached a petition for guardianship that she wanted him to look over and fill out as well as instructions on getting a DNA test for confirmation.

Two days later, he received another message from Maisie:

_Hi Peeta,_

_I finally told Prim. My husband and I sat her and Rue down explaining the situation. She has agreed to a DNA test and I have talked to CPS. Should the test prove positive and the paper work goes through, you will be granted custody of Prim._

_I am praying for both of you. I think that you need each other._

_-Maisie_

* * *

><p><em>Three and a Half Months Ago…<em>

"Are you ready?" Katniss asked over the phone. "She should be landing in about an hour."

"I think so," Peeta replied nervously. "The paperwork took a little longer to process—I hope that she's not upset."

"You're going to be fine, sweetie," she assured him. "Your mother would be proud of you, you know. You granted her wish."

His eyes went to the photo of Katniss on his desk; next to it was a sonogram photo of their child.

They had not asked about the sex but he had an inkling that it would be a girl.

"She granted mine," he responded softly.

A little hum of happiness escaped Katniss' lips at his words. "Well, I'll be asleep by the time you get home so I'll introduce myself in the morning. Let's not overwhelm her."

"Agreed," he said with a smile. "Hey Katniss?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." Peeta felt his cheeks warm. "For everything."

He could feel her smile through the phone. "I told you that you wouldn't be alone anymore."

Hanging up, Peeta looked to the clock before grabbing his keys and heading out the door.

Waving to Chaff in his office, he walked out the door to see the sun beginning to head west and making the sky that orange that he liked.

He wondered if Prim like sunsets.

He had time to find out.

* * *

><p>My goodness, this was exhausting.<p>

I'm sure that everyone wants to know what Peeta's letter said and you will—next chapter. Also, I know there are also those who want to know about Cinna, too. All in time, my friends.

I hope that this wasn't too confusing for you.

As always, hellos, comments, and reviews are welcomes on Tumblr, FF, and AO3.

Next: Chapter Seven, The First Day—Prim's reaction to the story

-JLaLa


	7. Chapter Seven: The First Day

Thank you so much for your awesome feedback for the last chapter!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Seven: The First Day**_

The sun was rising by the time Peeta finished his story. He stopped after a moment and took a long, weary breath before finally meeting her eyes, his own bloodshot and watery.

"And when I first saw you," he continued in a hoarse voice. "You looked so much like her—that I couldn't breathe. It was like having her back!" Peeta smiled softly to himself. "But, as much as you look like Mom, you're not her. You're your own person—strong, smart, and brave. I worried that maybe you wouldn't love me."

"Not love you?" she replied, her throat choked. "I don't know you, Peeta. You've pushed me away. You won't talk and you've kept our mother a mystery from me for weeks." Prim clenched her fists. "For years, I've wondered what was so wrong with me that my own family gave me up." She looked down at her blankets in exhaustion. "Now that I'm here—am I everything that you hoped for? Do you think that you could love me if you knew everything about me?"

"What do you mean?" Peeta asked softly.

Prim shook her head. "Not yet." She met her brother's eyes evenly. "This isn't about me—this is about you. For years, I've believed I wasn't loved. I'm having a hard time trying to grasp that you were always out there searching. That you've loved me all along."

"Peeta." They looked up to find Katniss in the doorway. She handed Peeta a small box before squeezing Prim's shoulder. "I'll be making breakfast."

"You don't think that I love you?" Peeta looked at her in disbelief. "You have it all wrong. From the moment I saw you with Mom, I've loved you. It was only the dimmest, slightest memory but I remember what I felt." Opening the box, he took out a rectangular-shaped pendant and handed it to her. "I'm sure you know what this is, from what I've told you."

Prim took it carefully, running her thumb over the front of it. Her mother's hands had once touched this same pendant and she felt a rush realizing that small connection. Opening it, she looked at the pictures inside. The middle picture was of their mother, much younger than she looked in the framed photograph that Prim had, cradling Peeta in her arms. The left photo was of Katniss and Sarah; she remembered Gale taking the photo during a recent visit.

The photo on the right—was of her.

It wasn't just any other photo. It was her class photo from last year; the one that Maisie had sent.

"You kept it," she said quietly. "How long has this been in here?"

"Since I got it," Peeta told her. "This locket is where I keep the most precious people in my life. I think that's why Mom gave it to me. She always knew that I wasn't good at expressing how I felt. And maybe she knew that you wouldn't know that we loved you, that we were looking for you, and that we would never rest until you were with us again." He looked down at the locket where their mother's photo lay. "Mom, she's home now."

Prim ran her thumb over her mother's photo; this woman had loved her and had spent every free breath in her body to find her. She had sacrificed her health to bring Prim into the world because she wanted her so much.

"Mama," she whispered as she looked at the photo. "I'm home."

She looked up to find Peeta taking his wallet from the box. Opening it, he reached inside and pulled out a folded paper.

"I've kept this in my wallet," he told her. "For good luck—and it has been, since I wrote it."

Peeta handed her the folded paper. Wordlessly, she took the paper already knowing what it contained.

Her brother continued to look through the box when his eyes zeroed in on something that caused a small chuckle to escape his mouth.

Prim looked to him curiously. "What?"

Peeta reached into the box and pulled out a small stuffed duck. He pressed the fabric before he held it out to her.

"Little Duck," he told her. "I got her for you. Sae brought me to the hospital gift shop after our first visit with Mom and let me pick out a present to give to you—for when you came home." He held the duck out shyly. "It took a while, but now she's with her rightful owner."

"Thanks." Prim tentatively took the small yellow duck. "I love her."

"She matches your hair," Peeta said affectionately. "Even then, I knew the exact shade."

"Must be the artist in you," she replied as she placed the duck against her pillow.

Peeta stood up. "I'm going to let you read that." His eyes went to the paper on her lap. "When you're ready, we can talk."

Prim nodded. "Okay."

He gave her a weary smile before turning to leave.

"Peeta." She was suddenly up and rushing to him, her arms encircling his waist. "I don't know what happens after this—but, thank you for finding me."

His arms enfolded around her and her brother placed a kiss on top of her head. "It's okay to not know." They pulled apart and he smoothed down her hair. "Take your time and get some rest—we had a long night."

"You, too," she responded.

Peeta nodded before turning and heading out the door, closing it behind him.

Prim went to her bed and sat down. She toyed with the locket, placing it on her bedside table—next to her mother's picture. She put the now-empty box on the floor before sitting back on her pillow with her duck next to her.

She looked down at the stuffed animal. "Little Duck." The name seemed right.

Her eyes went to the folded letter and Prim picked it up carefully, suddenly unsure. Her night had already been a very emotional one. Did she really want to push herself even more?

After a few moments of hesitation, Prim decided to suck it up. She quickly unfolded the letter and began to read:

_To Whom It May Concern,_

_My name is Peeta Mellark and seventeen years ago, my sister was separated from our family just a few days after she was born. I don't remember much about her except that she had golden hair, milky skin, and from what my mother has told me, deep blue eyes—though they may have changed color. I know that this is an innocuous description for a baby, but here is one more thing that might help in my search—her name was Primrose._

_If you are her, you may or may not know that you were adopted. You may have been looking for us or you might have been living your life not bothering to search. I wanted to tell you a few things just in case you were looking for us._

_We always wanted you. _

_You were never meant to be given away. Unbeknownst to our mother and me, you were taken away from us without permission. It nearly destroyed our mother. For years, she searched for you, tracked every clue, and documented every lead for your location. It was only when she became sick did she stop her search._

_When she passed on, I swear that your name was the last word whispered out of her mouth. But in some way, I think it gave her comfort that she would be somewhere where she could watch over you._

_She always loved you, Prim. If there is one thing I want you to get from this message, it's that. _

_There hasn't been a day that I haven't thought about you. Whenever Mom and I would walk around and we saw a little blonde girl, we would search for you in her. We wondered if you liked Rocky Road ice cream like we did and if you liked daisies—Mom's favorite flower. _

_We wondered if you were healthy and happy. We prayed that you weren't suffering; that you were with people who loved and cherished you. We hoped for the best because if you couldn't be with us, then we wanted you to have something just as good as or better than your actual family._

_I pray you're happy and I want you to know that you have a brother who loves you. And, I will continue loving you even if you decide not to reply or you never find this message._

_Prim, if you decide to talk—I'm here._

_Always,_

_Your big brother_

* * *

><p>Peeta awoke to the sound of small gurgles.<p>

"Deep in the meadow…" Katniss sang softly. "Under the willow…"

The gurgles continued and he opened his eyes to find Katniss in bed with him. Lying next to her was Sarah, whose small arms and legs flailed as she happily stared up at her mother. Katniss tickled their daughter's stomach as she sang and Sarah let out a laugh in response.

"That's her first real laugh," Peeta suddenly said. He turned to watch as Sarah reached for her mother's loose waves. Katniss dodged her easily, laughing as their daughter let out a discontent whine. "It sounds like your laugh."

She met his eyes, her own glowing in contentment. "Oh yeah? What exactly does my laugh sound like?"

"Full and joyful," he told her after a moment. "Your laugh was what led me to you. Because, it sounded similar to my mother's."

"I'm not sure how I feel about that," Katniss replied truthfully.

"Maybe it's not that it sounds the same but the fact that your laugh gives me assurance that things will be okay," Peeta said. "Hers used to do the same."

Katniss reached over to caress his cheek and he let himself fall against her soft palm. "That doesn't sound too bad."

"Is it really so bad for me to feel hope whenever you're around?" he asked fondly.

She sat up and leaned slightly forward to give him a kiss. "No, not at all."

Sarah let out a loud squeal and Peeta smiled down at his daughter. Every day that he woke up to see her face made all of the days he spent alone worth living through. He kissed her cheek and Sarah's eyes went to him—her Daddy. The thrill of being her father was unlike anything he'd ever felt.

"I know you're there, little love," he told her affectionately. Peeta tickled her tummy and she wiggled in protest at the sensation. "I can already tell that you're going to be a troublemaker—like your mother."

Katniss rolled her eyes, smiling good-naturedly. "Troublemaker?" She snorted. "Don't act like you don't like it."

"I love it," he told her.

Her eyes widened at the 'L' word and he could feel his face going red. That word was always met with some sort of awkwardness.

"I think that your talk with Prim has really done wonders for both your moods," Katniss told him. "She seemed a lot better during breakfast."

The four of them had eaten breakfast together. Prim's eyes were noticeably red, but she ate her breakfast smiling thoughtfully to herself. Katniss had insisted that she go to sleep after breakfast and Prim simply nodded before retreating back to her room.

Katniss and Peeta had also returned to their room where he had slept well into the afternoon.

Until he was awakened by the most beautiful sounds in the world: his daughter's happy gurgle and Katniss' singing.

"I feel…different," he explained. "Sort of how you felt after you had your talk with Prim."

"You know what this means though," Katniss told him.

Peeta looked to her. "What?"

"She hasn't said anything about her past," she told him. "And, I want an explanation for those nightmares."

"Me, too," he agreed. "But, I don't want to push her. Prim will tell us when she's ready. It's just her way."

"I know what you mean," Katniss told him with a wry smile. "You two are definitely brother and sister."

"Don't act like you don't like us," Peeta retorted.

Katniss scoffed as she reached for Sarah, cradling her gently. Their daughter nestled into her mother's chest.

"Don't be ridiculous," she muttered. "I lo—" Katniss turned to him, her eyes narrowed. "—I totally almost fell for that."

"Almost," Peeta said as Katniss stood up to rock Sarah. Their daughter's eyes were already closing by the time that her mother got to the crib. He watched Katniss carefully lay Sarah down before turning on the mobile—a present from Katniss' siblings—hanging above her head. "Katniss?"

She wiped the bit of Sarah's drool off her shirt as she went over to him. "Hmm?"

"Did you want to go to dinner or something?" Peeta asked quickly. He had no idea where the sudden surge of courage had come from.

Katniss put the drool cloth down before meeting his eyes. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

He thought for a moment. "I guess I am—if that's alright with you."

She straddled his lap quickly, her arms wrapping around his neck as her mouth went to his. Peeta groaned, aching to taste more of her. He cupped her bottom, grounding against her pelvis to feel the heat from her center.

"Oh God," she moaned into his mouth. "Can we go in two weeks?"

Peeta nodded eagerly. "Of course—" His mouth went to her neck to taste her sweet skin. "—why?"

"Birth control kicks in," Katniss told him. She pulled away and grinned. "And, I'm pretty sure that the date is going to end well."

* * *

><p>"You have lunch money?" Peeta asked Prim as they sat in his car. She nodded in affirmation. "And, you know the right bus to take home?"<p>

"Of course, I do," Prim responded. "And, if I don't, then I'm sure that there's some sort of app on my phone that will tell me."

"You're right," her brother said. "But, if you want to go home—"

"I will call you at work," she finished for him. "I thought you wanted me to go to school."

"I do," he said. "But, I got the impression from Maisie's letter that you didn't seem very happy at school. Also, you weren't very eager when we registered you."

"Well, I'm here so I might as well go," Prim told him. "I'll be fine."

Peeta nodded. "Okay, have a good day."

Getting out of the car, she turned to look up at the large brick building and sighed before quickly making her way toward the main office for her schedule.

* * *

><p>In her Trigonometry class, Prim met Delly Cartwright.<p>

She recognized the girl as being one of the girls that she had seen when she was registering. Delly was soft-spoken, but friendly. She had offered to share her book with Prim since the school had to order another copy for her.

"I can let you borrow my notes, too—if you want," Delly had offered Prim after class. "We can even study together, too."

"Sure," Prim said with a smile. "Why don't you give me your cell phone number?"

Delly eagerly typed her number into Prim's phone before writing down Prim's number.

"Thanks," Prim told the girl with a small smile.

"Of course," Delly said. "I remember you from the school office with your…boyfriend?"

"My brother," Prim corrected her. "My_ very _over-protective brother—he's so afraid that I'll get lost just taking a bus."

"I can help you out," the girl offered. "I take public transportation all the time. I'll just meet you after school."

Prim nodded. "Thanks, I'll meet you by the office then."

"See you later," Delly called out before turning to go to her next class.

Prim smiled to herself, glad to have finally seen a friendly face.

* * *

><p>In World History, someone threw a ball of paper at her head.<p>

Prim turned to find the dark-haired girl, who had been with Delly in the school office, waving at her. Before anyone could notice, she scrambled over to the table where Prim sat and took the empty chair next to her.

"You're Prim, right?" the girl asked.

Prim nodded as she took notes. She didn't have a book for this class either and needed to listen.

"I'm Johanna Mason." The girl gave her a quick smile. "Delly said that she's walking you to your bus stop later. I'm coming with you."

"Okay," Prim said in an unsure voice. "Why?"

"Because we're friends now, brainless," Johanna responded in annoyance.

"Oh." She continued to write. "Okay then." While Delly had been very gentle, she could see that Johanna was the complete opposite. Prim tended to have friends that were more like Delly and not like loud Johanna. "I'll see you after school."

"Are you seriously taking notes?" Johanna asked her.

Prim continued staring at the board as their teacher wrote. "Why wouldn't I?"

"I pay someone to write my notes," the girl declared boldly. "I'll have them make a copy for you." She covered Prim's notebook with her arm. "Now, talk to me!"

* * *

><p>"Sounds like you had a good first week of school," Gale said as he held out his hand. "Watch out, it gets a little steep on this section of the hill."<p>

Prim took his hand as they continued up the unsteady terrain. "Where the hell are we?"

"The best view of the city," he informed her in excitement. "You should feel special. I don't take a lot of people up here."

"I totally feel special," Prim said under her breath. "If I fall to my death, this will be an extra-special spot."

"What a pessimist," Gale responded, affection in his tone. "So your friends—Johanna and Delly—have they gone to the house yet?"

"Not yet, though Katniss insists that I invite them," she said as they found themselves back on steady ground. "Peeta is just relieved that I've made it through my first week. He's more than making up for seventeen years of not being able to be the overprotective brother."

Gale turned to her, his graphite eyes suddenly downcast. "Even the most protective brothers can feel like failures."

He turned to continue their hike when Prim suddenly grabbed his hand.

"None of that was your fault, Gale," she told him. "Katniss told me her story. You did everything you could. You're doing everything you can. You're a good brother."

Gale looked at their joined hands before meeting her eyes. "Thanks." He led her up the road and they made a sharp turn. "We're here."

She looked around, seeing how high they were. The city was laid out in front of them and she could recognize her neighborhood as well as the part of the city where Gale worked.

The sun was just beginning to dip down and she looked to the west to stare at the orange sky.

"This is my favorite part of the day," Prim told Gale.

He grinned as he met her eyes. "I want to show you one more thing."

They walked up a small hill to a series of trees where long, thick ropes were hanging from the branches with swing seats attached to them.

Gale looked to her, a gleam in his eyes as he pulled one of the swing seats towards her. "Well, hop on."

"You're on crack," she told him. "I'm going to break that branch."

"It's perfectly safe," he assured her. "Watch."

Gale held onto the rope and after getting a good running start, he quickly jumped onto the seat and swung for a bit to assure her.

He turned to Prim. "See?" Getting off the seat, Gale held it for her. "The hardest thing is realizing that this is not that hard. I promise you—the end result will be worth it."

"Fine." Prim took the rope from him. "Now what?"

Gale walked behind her. She felt the closeness of him and took a deep breath to quiet the loud beating in her ears.

He took the rope from her hands. "I'm going to hold the rope for you and you're going to sit on the seat," Gale instructed with his mouth to her ear. "When I let go, wrap your legs together."

Prim nodded, eager to quell the heat building between them. "Alright." She sat on the round seat, her bottom firmly on it before she turned to look at him. "I'm ready."

"That's my girl." Gale gave her an encouraging smile. "I'm going to let go now."

"Okay," Prim said shakily and closed her eyes as she felt the sudden force of her free fall.

She wrapped her legs as Gale instructed, feeling the breeze against her face.

"OPEN YOUR EYES!" he called out.

She did and found herself whirling above the city as dusk began. The exhilaration coursed through her and Prim let out a joyful laugh.

Her swing began to slow and Gale pulled the rope to bring her back to him. "How do you feel?"

"Like I've been to the moon," she replied as she met his eyes. They went silent for a moment. Her heart pounded full of adrenaline and anticipation as she let the warmth of his gaze fall upon her. "Are you going to kiss me?"

Gale looked at her in surprise. "Are you going to let me?"

Prim smiled, her mouth just about brushing his. "I wouldn't be this close if I wasn't going to let you."

He pressed his forehead to hers. "Why now?"

"Because the end result was worth it," Prim responded before she closed her eyes.

* * *

><p>A lot of shifts happening in this chapter—which I'm really enjoying.<p>

By the way, there are a few mountains that have tree swings here in San Francisco.

The next chapter will take place _**three months later**_—right in time for the holidays in the story timeline.

As always, hellos, reviews and comments are welcomed on Tumblr, AO3, and FF.

Next, Chapter Eight: The Dance

Till then, JLaLa


	8. Chapter Eight: The Dance

Thanks for all of your fabulous feedback!

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

We Go Down

_**Chapter Eight: The Dance**_

_Three Months Later…_

"Do you think that there's going to be an essay portion for the exam?" Johanna asked as she flipped through her textbook.

"It's high school," Prim told her as she read through her notes, highlighting the necessary points about the French Revolution. "Every exam has an essay."

Johanna groaned and put her head down on the kitchen table. Delly, who was sitting next to her, smiled complacently at their friend's over-dramatics and patted her head.

"My Mom made Rice Krispies treats," Delly offered gently. She stood up and went to the counter where a covered plate was. Johanna's head shot up eagerly as Delly put the plate on the dining table. "She knew you were coming." Delly looked over at Prim. "I would've told her what kind of snacks you were into, but I've never seen you gravitate towards anything in the lunch room. I don't even know if you're a sweet or savory girl."

"I'm an 'I'll eat what you give me' girl," Prim told them before looking back to her notebook. "I'm used to going hungry."

"What do you mean?" Johanna asked.

Prim's head shot up to meet her friends' eyes. She gave them an anxious smile. "Nothing."

"You're not anorexic or something, are you?" her dark-haired friend countered. Prim could see that trace of concern in her eyes. "I mean, you're thin as it is—but, you don't seem to have an affinity for any particular food."

"I'm not," Prim assured them with an easy smile. "I snack at home. My brother works at a Panem Bakery and he's always bringing food home." Delly and Johanna looked unconvinced. Finally, she put her pen down and took one of the Rice Krispies treats. Taking a bite, Prim opened her mouth to show them the masticated food. "I'll eat the whole thing in front of you—"

"Okay, we get it…" Johanna shook her head with a smile. "…but that was just gross."

"Moving on," Delly interrupted as she sat back down. "Did you hear about the dance?"

"Oh yes, because that's what I've been concentrating on," Johanna told them. "There's nothing like wearing an uncomfortable dress and dancing with a guy who lacks rhythm—or manners."

"I didn't know that a date meant that much to you," Delly joked. "I thought we'd all go and then after, we could go get a bite to eat or something." She looked over at Prim and grinned. "Except I'm sure that Gale will be going with you."

Prim blushed at her words, her eyes suddenly moving back to her paper.

Her relationship with Gale was in a sort of…limbo. She did not call him a boyfriend though she enjoyed holding his hand when they rode in his car or laying her head on his shoulder, if they watched a movie. Prim never denied him a kiss and vice-versa, but lately she was beginning to crave them more. She was drunk by the taste of him.

But then, the overwhelming guilt would take over, sobering her, and if they were in the middle of something, Prim would just…stop.

Gale was unbelievably patient. Maybe without even knowing Prim's past, he understood her hesitance having seen Katniss in uncomfortable situations with their stepfather. Prim was sure seeing _that_ had to have some sort of effect on him.

"Dances aren't my thing," Prim told them simply. "And, Gale isn't going to be interested in going to some high school dance, anyway."

"Well, he seems pretty interested in picking you up from your high school," Johanna pointed out. "I mean if he wasn't into you, then he wouldn't always be waiting outside school to bring you home."

Prim smiled in spite of herself. "He can be pretty nice when he wants to be."

"But, he can be bad, too?" Johanna added with a grin.

"No," she responded sharply. "I don't like that kind of guy." Feeling a headache coming on, Prim placed her fingers on her temples. "I have to get home soon. Can we just finish up?"

Her two friends looked at one another before turning to her. She knew they were worried—but it was fruitless to worry about her. They would only get hurt.

"Sure," Delly said after a moment. "I'm going to get you some water first." She gave Prim a kind smile. "You look like you're getting a migraine—studying with Johanna can do that to you."

"HEY!" Johanna protested and Prim laughed at Delly's words. Delly and Johanna balanced each other out perfectly. She could see how they had been friends for so long—since childhood, according to Delly.

"Speaking of studying." Delly placed a glass of water in front of her. "Is there any way that we can go to your place for the next session? It turns out that my Mom is having her book club over next Friday."

"What about Johanna's place?" Prim asked nervously.

"It's a shoebox of a place," Johanna told her. "My Dad and I live in a one bedroom apartment. He works as a truck driver and spends his days asleep on the pullout bed in our living room. So there's no room at my place." The dark-haired girl smirked at her. "What are you hiding from us, Prim?"

She had managed to keep her friends from knowing about her whole family situation. It wasn't that she was ashamed of Peeta, Katniss, or Sarah—but their situation was strange.

Also, how do you introduce your brother, the teenage mother of his child, and their very adorable daughter?

"Nothing," she finally said. "You can come over."

* * *

><p>"My friends want to come to the house on Friday," Prim told Katniss and Peeta during dinner that night.<p>

"That's great!" Katniss said as she fed Sarah who was in her high chair. Prim's niece had grown quickly; her dark hair now hitting the nape of her neck and her eyes now a definitive blue, just like her namesake. "Johanna and Delly, right?"

"Yeah…" She looked at Katniss and Peeta before continuing, "…I haven't told them about you two."

Peeta met her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"How do you explain…you?" Prim asked the 'couple'—though they had not confirmed or denied it.

Katniss looked to Peeta, who gave her a small smile. This had been happening a lot lately: the soft looks, the weird smiling, and that beam that Peeta had every morning after he and Katniss went out on a date.

If they weren't careful, she would have another niece or nephew coming.

"I guess you can say that we're…together," Peeta finally said. He turned to Katniss and smiled. "Is that weird?"

Katniss' cheeks were scarlet and she shook her head. "Not at all."

"I was going to ask you if you wanted to come to my company's Christmas party," he responded. "Everyone assumes that because we have Sarah that I'd bring you as my date anyway."

Prim saw Katniss' face fall. "Oh." She stood up and lifted Sarah from her high chair. "I better put her to bed." Katniss walked out of the kitchen before Prim or Peeta could say anything.

"What just happened?" Peeta asked.

God, Prim wanted to smack him in the back of the head.

"I don't think that Katniss wanted to go to your Christmas party with the pretense that you would be introducing her as just the mother of your child," Prim responded brusquely. "I think she was hoping that during the party she wouldn't be Sarah's mother, but _your_ girlfriend or partner or whatever."

Peeta groaned. "I fucked up, didn't I?"

Prim nodded. "Yeah, you did."

Standing up, he headed towards the kitchen doorway before turning back to her.

"When your friends come over, tell them that Katniss and I are together," he told Prim.

"Because you are?" Prim responded.

Peeta gave her a hopeful smile. "Because I want us to be."

* * *

><p>He found Katniss lying in bed, her back towards him.<p>

Sarah was already asleep and as Peeta placed her blanket over her tiny form, he reached up to turn on her mobile and let the music fill the room.

Going to his side of the bed, he crawled in and reached over to wrap his arms around Katniss' waist.

"I guess I don't do romance well," Peeta stated after a moment.

"No," Katniss responded in a hoarse voice. "Not really."

He could hear the tears in her voice and his arms pulled her closer so that her back was pressed to his chest.

"I'm no good with words," he began. "But, I like you, Katniss—more than you realize. And…I would be honored if you would accompany me to that Christmas party."

After a pregnant pause, Katniss finally turned to him. "You're actually very good with your words." Her eyes were bloodshot and he reached forward to wipe the corner of her eyes with his thumbs. "But, I'm only human, Peeta, and I can hurt, too."

Cupping her face in his hands, Peeta leaned forward to kiss her. Katniss complied, her small moans encouraging him to further taste her.

Reluctantly, he pulled away. "I didn't kiss you to ask you to forgive me," Peeta whispered against her lips. "I kissed you because I want you. I want this. I want us. All you have to do is tell me what I can to do make that happen."

Katniss grinned, her arms wrapping around his neck. "At the party, introduce me as your girlfriend."

* * *

><p><em>Friday<em>

"Wow…" Delly breathed out as she followed Prim up the stairs. "This house is classic."

"Yeah, it's been in my family for years," she explained. "The neighborhood grew around it."

"And, you lived here your whole life?" Johanna asked.

Prim shook her head as they reached the top steps. "No."

She was thankful that Katniss had taken the time to clean up the place. There was no longer a layer of dust against everything and the floors shone from a wax that she had done the night before.

"Let's go to the kitchen," Prim told her friends. "I think that my brother should've brought something home from the bakery."

She could feel her palms getting sweaty at the thought of having to explain her family to her two friends. But, Katniss and Peeta had promised that they would keep out of the way and _not _humiliate her.

However when they entered the kitchen, she found Peeta standing by the counter with a coffee mug in his hands.

Shirtless.

His eyes widened and he quickly put his cup down. "OH, CRAP!" Peeta looked to her apologetically. "I was just about to leave for work, but Sarah spilled her food on my shirt."

Prim shook her head, her face burning. "It's fine," she told him. "This is my brother, Peeta. He usually doesn't walk around with his shirt off."

Peeta recovered quickly to offer his hand to Johanna and then to Delly. "It's nice to meet you. Prim talks a lot about you both. It feels like I know you already."

Johanna approached him, a flirtatious glint in her eyes. "Well—"

"SORRY!" Katniss rushed in, balancing Sarah in one arm while holding Peeta's button up in the other. "Just ironed this one for you." She handed the shirt to Peeta and gave the girls a quick grin. "That's the perils of babies. They learn to throw things—including apple sauce."

Peeta quickly buttoned up his shirt to give Prim what little dignity she had intact and not exposing himself any further.

He looked to Katniss. "Sweetheart, would check the back of my shirt and make sure that it looks alright?"

Katniss eyed him, surprised at his endearment. "Okay…" She turned to Prim to place Sarah in her arms.

"She's cute," Delly remarked, her eyes wide. Sarah reached forward and Delly caught her, holding the baby close. "What's her name?"

"Sarah," Katniss informed her as she smoothed down the shoulders of Peeta's shirt. She turned him and gave his uniform the onceover. "All done."

Peeta gave her a smile before wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her thoroughly.

Prim turned away while Delly played with Sarah.

Johanna just stared.

Pulling away, Peeta winked causing Katniss to blush. "I'll be home by ten." He went to Prim and kissed the top of her head. "Have fun." Then, he waved to Johanna and Delly. "Nice meeting you."

Peeta rushed out of the kitchen leaving the four girls and Sarah to themselves.

Katniss turned to Delly. "I'll take her." She reached forward and took Sarah from the girl. "I'm Katniss." She shook Delly's hand and then Johanna's. "I'm sorry for all the craziness, but kids…" She kissed her daughter affectionately on the cheek. "She's been very tactile lately—everything that Peeta and I own smells like baby food." Katniss looked down bashfully at the tank top and shorts that she was wearing. "Thus, the summerwear."

Johanna looked at her. "And your Peeta's…?"

"Girlfriend," Katniss stated squarely, the glow at the words evident in her eyes.

Prim's eyes widened—that was a new development.

"And, Sarah's mother," she continued. Katniss took a breath and gave them a smile. "So there's sodas, lemonade, and water in the fridge, some chips in the cupboard and Peeta brought home some cheese rolls from work—they're my favorite. I'm going to put this little girl to bed and finish folding the rest of our clean clothes—while we still have them."

"Hey, Katniss?" Prim suddenly called to her. "You can always come down after you're done."

Katniss grinned, her eyes bright at being included. "Maybe I'll come down later—after your homework is done."

* * *

><p>"So you live here with Peeta and Prim?" Johanna asked Katniss curiously.<p>

After studying, it had suddenly turned into a dinner and the four girls sat at the kitchen table. Sarah slept upstairs, but her mother had a sharp ear on the baby monitor at the table. They had all agreed on pizza for dinner and were just opening the second pizza box.

"Yes, all mothers tend to stay where their children are," Katniss replied simply, though Prim could see the pained expression in her smoky eyes.

Prim could see that Katniss felt a little undone by Johanna's probing. It was just her friend's personality. Johanna never meant any harm; but knowing Katniss, her defenses were probably up. On the opposite end, Delly had been a gracious guest and even offered to help clean up after they ate. She had also paid for half of their dinner.

"How old are you?" Johanna continued as she took a bite of pizza. "You couldn't be more than eighteen."

"I just turned seventeen," Katniss replied.

Johanna let out a snort and grinned at her. "Wow—you're like a statistic."

"Does your family live around here?" Delly suddenly inquired.

Katniss nodded, giving her a smile. "My family lives about twenty minutes away. You've met my brother—Gale."

Johanna threw up her arms. "How did we not see the resemblance? Same colored hair, same eye color!" She turned to Prim. "Maybe it's because we've spent so much time bugging you about asking him to our Winter Dance!"

"There's a dance?" Katniss asked before looking to her. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Prim stiffened. "Because I'm not going," she told them sharply.

The three girls stared at her and Prim could feel her body tensing at their looks.

"It's just a dance," Delly quickly said, seeing Prim's agitation.

Prim took a deep breath, avoiding Katniss' worried eyes. "You're right—it's just a dance."

* * *

><p>"You should've heard her," Katniss told Peeta from across the room. "She turned pale and her voice got kind of tight—like she couldn't breathe."<p>

"Maisie mentioned that Prim wasn't happy at school during our correspondence," Peeta offered from where he sat on the bed. "Maybe she had a fight with a boyfriend or something…"

"Prim doesn't seem like the kind of girl to be so upset over a boy. We can't let her hide anymore. She has to be able to trust us," Katniss replied with a sigh. She adjusted her dress, fixing her neckline and making sure that her breasts were looking perky. "Are your eyes still closed?"

"Yes, my eyes are closed," he responded, before lying back on the bed. "Are you ready?"

"Almost," Katniss assured him as she smoothed out the front of the dress. She and Prim had seen the dress in a small boutique during one of their walks with Sarah. Prim had insisted that she try it on and upon seeing her in it, urged that Katniss buy it for the holiday party. "I just don't want to look like I'm seventeen."

She threw on the pair of black heels that Johanna had let her borrow—a sort of apologetic gesture for being so nosey during their first meeting.

Taking a deep breath, Katniss walked towards Peeta who was still lying in bed with his eyes closed. He was in a dark charcoal suit with a white button and a black tie around the collar. Peeta looked unbelievably handsome in it.

"You can open your eyes," she told him nervously.

Sitting up, Peeta opened his eyes and Katniss waited expectantly as his eyes roamed over the burgundy dress that fit her post-baby figure like a glove. The cap sleeves and plunged neckline gave the simple sheath that hint of sophistication that she had been going for. Her hair was curled to define her waves and she had put on a little bit of makeup.

It had been the first time that she had worn makeup since she got pregnant.

Finally, she had enough of his staring, "Say something!"

Peeta stood up and pressed a kiss to her lips. "You definitely do not look seventeen." He lifted her chin with his finger, his blue eyes glowing at her. "You look…" His lips rose in small smile. "…Can we just stay home?"

Katniss shook her head and grinned. "Oh no—I spent a lot of time getting ready and this dress is the one thing that doesn't smell of barf or baby food."

Peeta put an arm around her. "How could I deny you a night out?"

"Don't," she whispered as she stared up at him.

"In that case, I wanted to give you this." He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small box. "I know it's a little late since your birthday has already come and gone—but it just looked like it belonged to you."

Katniss took the box carefully and opened it to reveal a gold ring with a small ruby on it.

"It was my mother's," Peeta told her as he slipped it onto her right ring finger. "Prim will get the rest of her jewelry on her eighteenth birthday but I asked Prim about this ring. She agreed that it should be yours." He smiled shyly. "Seeing as you bore my child and all."

"It's…" Katniss swallowed slowly. "…lovely." She turned to Peeta. "People are going to think we're together or something."

"Well, okay." Peeta kissed her forehead affectionately. "Then, we'll be together."

* * *

><p>Katniss was beautiful.<p>

On the other hand, she was always beautiful.

Peeta watched her as she stared, wide-eyed, at the chandelier in the restaurant where his company's holiday party was taking place. Then, her eyes timidly looked around at his co-workers who were all dressed up.

Some were holding wine glasses in their hands and he almost laughed at the strangeness of it all.

He and Katniss were not legally able to drink yet they were able to raise a child.

"Did you want something to drink?" he asked her.

She shook her head. "No, I'm too nervous."

Peeta took her hand. "Why are you nervous?"

"It's just been a strange year," Katniss told him. "A new home, a child, Prim, you…" She looked around the restaurant, her eyes going to the floor-to-ceiling windows across from them. "All of this, it doesn't seem real. Here with your co-workers, I'm just your girlfriend—not that girl who's living with you because I had your baby."

"Katniss." He took her face in his hands. "You were never just that girl—not since the moment I saw you."

She smiled into his hands, the apples of her cheeks pressing into his palms.

"PEETA!" They turned to see his boss, Chaff, walking towards them. "Didn't think that we would get you out here—with the baby and all!" He looked over at Katniss, giving her a friendly smile. "This must be the woman of the hour."

"Chaff, this is my girlfriend, Katniss Everdeen," Peeta told him. "Katniss, this is my boss, Chaff."

Katniss gave him a pretty smile. "It's nice to meet you, sir."

His boss pulled her into an embrace. "I feel like I practically know you just from the way that Peeta talks about you."

She grinned at the man. "Peeta talks?"

Chaff chuckled. "Well, not too much. But, when he does—it's about you." A beautiful, mocha-skinned woman joined them and gave them a friendly smile. "My wife, Portia."

Peeta looked at the woman; she was at least twenty years younger than Chaff. However, his boss had always talked with pride about Portia, who was a well-known biochemist in Berkeley.

"It's nice to finally meet you," Peeta said. "Peeta Mellark." He turned to present Katniss. "My girlfriend, Katniss."

Portia smiled at the couple. "Nice to meet you!" She looked between them. "Chaff didn't mention that you were getting married!"

"What?" Katniss said in shock.

"Your ring," Portia stated with a knowing smile. "I know it's on the wrong finger but you can't really deny what it is." She looked over at her husband. "You'll have to make sure that they have a dance tonight." Portia entwined her arm with Katniss', leading his girlfriend away as she told her about her own wedding in the Bahamas.

"We're pretty lucky, aren't we?" Chaff said as they watched the two women go towards the bar.

Katniss turned and smiled at him. She pointed to her glass and mouthed, "It's soda" before sticking out her tongue at him.

He let out a laugh before looking to Chaff. "Yeah, we're lucky."

* * *

><p>She was having fun.<p>

As much as Katniss missed Sarah, she couldn't help but enjoy being in a beautiful dress, not cleaning a house, and being able to just hold Peeta's hand as they greeted his co-workers. She liked being pulled aside into some dark hallway of the austere restaurant and being kissed by her 'boyfriend'.

God, she loved being kissed by Peeta.

She could feel herself slowly coming back to life; that old familiar feeling of newness and possibility coursing through her body whenever he touched her. It had been silly, but after their six weeks had passed, they had not gotten together—in that old familiar way. And, as they went on small dates in attempts to figure out what they were, they had still waited.

Things had been different when she was pregnant. The number of hormones running through her nether regions controlled their time together. She had to have him—over and over—and daily, like her prenatal vitamins.

Now, it could be different. It didn't have to be in some back alley or because her hormones were in overdrive.

It could just be because they wanted to.

"You okay?" Peeta asked, his hair a bit mussed from their last private encounter.

The employees of Panem Bakery were gathered in the center of the restaurant as Chaff made his welcome speech. Beside him stood Portia, who had been unbelievably kind to her. She felt a kinship with the woman who was excited to have another 'Panem wife' to hang out with at these parties.

She nodded, her hand reaching to fix his hair. "I'm good—just hoping that Prim is doing okay with Sarah."

Peeta kissed the top of her head. "I just called and they're getting ready for bed. Prim told me not to take Sarah from her when we got home. It would just ruin both of their sleep patterns."

Katniss highly doubted that it had anything to do with that. Prim was fully aware that they had no alone time together.

"For those of you who don't know, we have just learned that our good friend and co-worker, Peeta, is engaged to the beautiful mother of his child, Katniss!" Chaff announced. "We know you're out there, so both of you, wave!"

Katniss turned to him. "Why didn't we tell them that it wasn't true?"

He shrugged. "I'll tell him on Monday. For now, let's—"

She took his hand. "—go with it." Together, they stepped forward and waved to the applause of the crowd. "I'm with you."

"This isn't for any ulterior motives," he told her. "It's actually kind of nice to imagine…" Peeta stopped himself.

"Really, I understand," she whispered to him. "Tonight, let's just pretend."

"Portia made me promise that you had to come out and dance," Chaff continued. "So, we picked out a little tune—an old school one—for our engaged couple." He motioned for them to go to the center of the restaurant. "Let's have a round of applause for the future Mr. and Mrs. Peeta Mellark!"

Katniss pulled him forward with an excited smile. "Let's go."

Together, they reached the floor as the music began and Peeta wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close.

"_Someone to care  
>Someone to share<br>Lonely hours and moments of despair  
>To be loved, to be loved<br>Oh what a feeling to be loved…"_

"The last time I danced was at a Halloween dance in middle school and it was to 'Monster Mash'," Peeta recollected. "But, this is much, much better."

There was the clinking of glass and she looked to see Portia leading a group of people who were using their forks to tap against their glasses.

"Why are they doing that?" she asked, pulling slightly away from Peeta to meet his eyes.

He smiled gently. "They do that at weddings—to get the newlyweds to kiss."

"Oh—" Katniss looked down for a moment before gazing up at him hopefully. "—well?"

Peeta smiled. "If my lady asks."

His lips went to hers, tentative at first, before she placed a hand to the nape of his neck to deepen the kiss. His arms tightened to press their bodies closer and there was no doubt that he could feel how rapid her heart was beating.

"Wow," Peeta whispered against her mouth as they pulled away. His deep blues searched her eyes for the answers to whatever was happening. "Katniss—"

"Thank you," she suddenly said as they continued their dance.

"For what?" he asked her.

"I know it's not the same." Katniss rested her head on his shoulder. "But, I didn't get to go to my prom."

* * *

><p>Prim awoke to the sound of Sarah's happy gurgling. Opening her eyes, she found Peeta holding the little girl. He easily swung her in the air before kissing her cheeks.<p>

She smiled as she watched the two. So, that's what it was like to be loved.

"You're nice and chipper this morning," Prim said as she sat up. "Did you have fun last night?"

"It was great," Peeta replied as he sat next to her with Sarah in his lap. "But, it's nothing like being home with you, Katniss and Sarah." He kissed the top of her head. "Thank you for watching her."

"Katniss was really looking forward to yesterday," Prim told him. "Hope you showed her a good time."

Peeta had the good grace to blush.

"Oh, gross!" she exclaimed at the realization of what had so obviously happened. "Now, I'm _really_ glad that I gave into my leftover pizza coma."

"Well, Katniss is cooking breakfast, so get up." Standing, Peeta took her hand to pull her up and she obliged her brother, who was in a cheery mood.

She groaned, "There better be bacon."

"I got some this morning," he told her.

"Did you stay up all night?" she asked as they stepped out into the hallway. Prim watched her brother flush once more before looking straight forward. "Never mind, I don't want to know."

There was a knock on the door as they passed the stairs.

"I'll get it." Prim rushed down to avoid the possible sight of PDA that might occur in the kitchen. Opening the front door, she was happy to see Gale in front of her.

Prim had not seen him in almost a week. He had been busy with work and his family. She had been getting ready for her upcoming tests before winter break.

She gave him a bright smile. "Hey stranger."

"I almost didn't remember your face!" Gale pulled her in for a hug and she surrendered herself to that woodsy scent that he always seemed to smell of—despite the fact that the nearest forest was across a bridge. He cupped her face in his hands and pressed his forehead to hers. "I need to memorize everything about you—just in case that long absence happens again."

Her lips reached forward to press against his. "So you won't forget me."

His grey eyes stared into hers. "Never, never."

She smiled before taking his hand and pulling him up the stairs. "I need you to save me from Peeta and your sister. They've been veryaffectionate this past week—and yesterday, they had a _really _good time at Peeta's company party."

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders as they walked into the kitchen. "I'll need a distraction." Gale leaned down to kiss her quickly.

"You're kissing my sister, Everdeen," Peeta called out as they pulled away.

"You knocked up my sister, Mellark," Gale retorted as he pulled a seat for Prim. Then, he went to hug his sister. "You're looking great, sis."

"I'm suddenly feeling very energized," Katniss replied before looking over at Peeta and winking.

Gale backed away and joined Prim at the table. "More than I needed to know."

They all settled in to eat breakfast. Gale told Katniss about Posy's part in the winter play at school and Vick's latest meet. He never mentioned their mother as Prim had learned that it was an especially sore spot for Katniss lately.

Gale had also been taking care of their mother who suffered a miscarriage about a month ago. Katniss had been upset that her mother still refused to talk to her. At the same time, Katniss understood how painful it might be to talk to her, especially with all of their drama.

Prim could relate.

"Did Prim tell you about the dance?" Katniss abruptly asked her brother as they changed subjects.

She almost wanted to hit Katniss—not this again.

"What dance?" Gale grinned at her.

"It doesn't matter," Prim told him in a hard voice. "We're not going."

"Why not?" he inquired. She could tell that Gale was hurt, but it was better this way.

There would be no way that they would have good time, especially because she would not be able to function.

"Dances are lame," she argued weakly. "I don't want to get dressed up over a dance in a gym."

"You can borrow my dress," Katniss offered. "You'll look a lot better in it—"

"JUST STOP!" Prim stood up, her chair scraping loudly against the linoleum as she looked at her family. "WHY DO YOU INSIST ON BRINGING THIS UP? I TOLD YOU 'NO'—AND I MEANT IT."

Peeta's eyes were laced with concern and she could feel the guilt overwhelming her.

"What's going on with you, Prim?" her brother asked gently.

She felt her throat tighten up and her sight begin to blur. "WHY CAN YOU JUST LEAVE THINGS ALONE?"

"You can't hide from us anymore," Peeta said to her, his eyes boring into hers. "Prim, why don't you want to go to this dance?"

She felt herself sink into her chair, her arms wrapping around herself feeling that suddenly cold anxiety, a triggered response that has not happened in over a year.

"Because…" Her throat was so thick with tears that she could barely get the rest of her words out. "…I was raped after one."

* * *

><p>Yes, if you haven't guess by now—the next chapter is all Prim.<p>

I do have a picture of Katniss' dress—which is one that I actually want. No reason for me to get it though.

"To Be Loved" is sung by Jackie Wilson.

Next, Chapter Nine: Prim

Till then,

JLaLa


	9. Chapter Nine: Prim

And, here we are—the last past chapter. Should be interesting…

The characters of The Hunger Games Trilogy do not belong to me.

**Trigger warnings: acts of pedophilia, violent sexual acts, suicide, and abortion**

We Go Down

_**Chapter Nine: Prim**_

_Fourteen Years Ago…_

She remembered Effie.

Effie, with her blue eyes and sweet smile. Effie, who gave her kisses and braided her shoulder-length blonde hair. Effie, who loved everything about her—even the name that had been put on her adoption contract—so she had remained Primrose, even when she was brought to the Cranes.

"Remember Prim," Effie would tell her. "You must always be a good girl. Mind your manners. Be silent and never complain."

Effie often recited these platitudes to Prim before she put her to bed.

"Will you give me a hug, Prim?" Effie would ask her as the little girl lay in her canopy bed. "Because, I love you most of all. Your poor father was so distraught when he came to us…couldn't bear to look at you because you reminded him so much of your mother."

"Mommy?" Prim managed to say.

Effie's eyes brightened. "Yes, Prim. I am your Mommy because your real mother has gone to heaven." The woman kissed her forehead gently. "I've even kept your name the same because it was hers—so there is a Prim in heaven and a Prim on earth."

Prim didn't understand what she was saying. But, she liked Effie's soft voice.

"EFFIE!" The angry shout came from the hallway where Seneca, Effie's husband, stood.

Effie looked to her, eyes wide with trepidation. "Remember what I said—be silent."

Prim nodded and her 'alive' mother walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.

_Be silent._

She remembered Seneca, too.

Seneca, who had been disappointed that Effie was infertile. Seneca, who had wanted a son instead of a daughter. Effie had promised that Prim would be smarter and more accomplished than any boy. Prim was already unflawed when it came to her looks.

Effie sold her husband on Prim's golden hair and sweet blue eyes.

Yes, she remembered Seneca, too.

Because he was only nice to her when she was clean.

He made sure that she was—by bathing with her.

And, Seneca wasn't mean to her if she did a good job on soaping him.

It was only when one of the maids in their large New Orleans mansion caught him with her that everything had changed.

The baths stopped—and Seneca was no longer nice to her.

In fact, he pretended that she didn't exist altogether.

_Be silent._

"STOP IT! YOU'RE HURTING ME!" Effie was screaming louder.

Frightened, Prim burrowed herself into her pink comforter that Effie picked out for her.

"SHUT UP OR I WILL MAKE YOU SHUT UP!" came the response.

"GET OFF ME, SENECA! GET OFF—"

Effie went silent.

The Master bedroom was next to her room and she could hear the headboard banging against the wall. Effie had warned her that Mommies and Daddies often needed alone time and this noise often happened when alone time started.

So, if she ever heard it—Prim had to be silent and go to sleep.

So that night—the night that Effie went silent—Prim went to sleep.

* * *

><p>"OH MY LORD!"<p>

Prim opened her eyes to see a man with a dark hat and a dark suit staring down at her.

She cried out and hid under her blankets. "Where's Mommy?"

There was a shuffle. "Sweetheart, my name is Thom. I'm a police officer. Can you just peek out a little?"

Prim tentatively lifted a bit of her blanket to see that the man was kneeling in front of her. "What's a policeman?"

"We're people who protect you from the bad guys," he said to her kindly. Thom presented her with a shiny piece that he took from his pocket. "This is my badge—all policemen have them. You can hold mine, if you want."

Carefully, she sat up to take the piece of sunshine. "This is pretty!" The man was dark haired and had grey eyes—which she liked. "You're pretty, too."

"Thank you, sweetheart," he told her. "Why don't we go outside?"

Prim nodded and taking the man's hand, she walked out into the hallway, still fascinated with the shiny object.

"I want to show Mommy!" she told Thom and rushed over to the Master bedroom.

"No. WAIT—" Thom called out as she pushed the door open.

There was a flash of a camera and Prim looked to see Effie in bed. There were so many people around her yet she remained asleep, her eyes closed and her lips the color of the blue pond that was in the backyard.

"Who let her in here?" someone yelled out.

Prim recoiled at the loud tone and she went to take Effie's hand.

It was cold.

"Mommy, wake up and put on your favorite coat," she told the sleeping woman. Effie had a bright pink coat that she often wore whenever they went out together. She told Prim that it was given to her by her mother.

One day, Prim would be given that coat when she was big enough.

"Mommy…" Effie's head fell to the side and she suddenly turned to Thom, who was now beside her with tears in his eyes. "Mommy is cold!"

"I know, sweetheart," Thom told her. "We have to go now."

"No…no…" Prim looked to Effie. "Mommy, can I give you a hug?"

Hugs made people warm—she always felt warm whenever Effie hugged her. She even felt warm when Seneca hugged her under the bath water—though it was a little weird when it was skin to skin.

"You can't hug her," Thom said gently. "Let's go." He took her hand and led her down the stairs.

Behind her, Prim could hear the other people in dark suits whispering. Some words she knew and some she didn't.

Together, she and Thom walked down the grand staircase where many old paintings of Effie's family were placed against the wall. She didn't like any of them because no one smiled in the paintings—and Prim didn't want to look grumpy like they did.

As they crossed the threshold of her front door and onto the porch, Prim looked to the man beside her. "Thom?"

He looked at her worriedly. "Yes, sweetheart?"

Prim looked over toward the flashing lights on the cars in front of her before turning to him to ask her question.

"What does strangulation mean?"

* * *

><p><em>Ten Years Ago…<em>

_Strangulation: __**1**__.The action or state of strangling or being strangled. __**2**__. The condition in which circulation of blood to a part of the body is cut off by constriction._

Thom never told her what it meant.

Instead, he placed her into the back of a police car in only her pajamas and his badge in her hands.

It took her years to finally muster up the courage to look the word up. She was five, at the time, and was already reading well above her grade level. Prim devoured books—they were her only escape in the foster homes that she was placed in.

Books never abandoned you. They never hurt you or made fun of you. They never hit you with the metal parts of their belts.

Cressida, her clinician and social worker, had told her that she could find her way in books. So, Prim searched for answers through reading.

Because, she always felt so lost.

Especially when she finally put the pieces together—Effie died by strangulation.

Seneca had made her quiet—forever.

Now, she had two Mommies in heaven.

"Prim, are you listening to me?"

She looked to Cressida, who was sitting across from her in another one of the foster kids' beds. Prim never took the time to memorize names. Usually, the kid who slept next to her was gone before she could remember them.

"What?" she responded. "Sorry, Cressida. I just got lost in thought."

"You've been doing that a lot lately," Cressida informed her, worry evident in her tone. "It's been a bit of concern to your foster parents."

"Well, Brutus and Enobaria aren't exactly idealistic foster parents themselves," Prim said as she took her pillow and hugged it to her chest. "At least they're not smacking me with belts like the last family."

"I told you that I was sorry for that," the woman replied. "I was not the person who did the inspection and I was assured that they were good foster parents."

"They were good because the kids who were with them were afraid," Prim responded bluntly.

Cressida smiled proudly at her. "But you weren't."

Prim sighed and pressed her lips to her pillow before meeting Cressida's eyes once more.

"I learned a long time ago that being quiet gets you nowhere," Prim replied. She wiped the tears from her eyes. She was nearly eight and was suddenly crying like a baby, which really didn't do anything but make her anxious. "Are they going to kick me out?"

Cressida joined her on her bed and draped an arm over her shoulders. "No. But, it's clear that you're not happy."

"It's like a rotating door here," Prim told her. "All the kids are being taken except for me. Why doesn't anyone want me?"

The woman pulled her closer. "Remember, I was in your shoes once. But, I found my perfect home and I was even older than you were when I was finally adopted. One day, your family will come for you. You will know right away that you are home—and everything will just fall into place."

"You promise?" Prim asked.

"You know I can't make promises, Prim," Cressida warned. "But, I can try my hardest."

"What do you want me to do until then?" she asked her friend.

"Study, read, and don't stop thinking that you don't deserve the best, Prim," Cressida told her. "Because, you do."

"I bet you say that to all the kids," Prim told her.

Cressida shook her head and kissed Prim's temple. "Just you."

* * *

><p><em>Nine Years Ago…<em>

_**Capitol, Virginia**_

"What if they don't like me?" Prim asked her social worker as they sat in the car.

"They are going to think you're fabulous," Cressida assured her. "The Roberts are a great family. I interviewed them myself. This is their first time being a foster family and they are just as nervous as you are. Also, their daughter Rue is your age and she has an awesome book collection—maybe you can show her some of your favorites."

Prim drummed her fingers against her suitcase—a nervous habit that happened now and again.

"You just have to show them the side that you show me," Cressida told her. She lifted Prim's chin. "Show them the girl who loves to read and who tells great stories. The one who likes to dance and sing—show them everything that is great and wonderful in you. You can't gain anything if you're not willing to lose yourself in the moment."

Prim smiled at her. "Did you get that from a Hallmark card?"

Cressida chuckled. "No—it was from one of those _Chicken Soup for the Soul_ books." She pushed open her car door. "Come on, we can't stay in this car forever!"

With a huff, Prim got out of Cressida's small silver Volkswagen and looked at the house in front of her. It was a white ranch-style home with a large lawn. The mailbox had been painted with a bright sun that said 'Roberts' in the middle of it. A red bike lay on the lawn as if someone had rode it then rushed into the house—she suspected that it was the girl.

Cressida put an arm around her and led her up the gravel path. Prim stood aside as her friend rang the doorbell. When the door opened, a heavy-set woman with mocha skin stood in the doorway. She shook Cressida's hand and then met Prim's eyes, giving her a beautiful smile bearing all of her pearly whites.

"Maisie," Cressida began. "This is Primrose Crane." She gently pushed Prim forward. "Prim, this is Maisie—your foster mother."

Maisie went to her. "Hello, darlin'." The woman looked her over in admiration. "You're a lovely one—so tall like our Rue. Come in!" She ushered Prim and Cressida into the house.

The inside of the house was simple but nicely decorated with its pretty curtains, clean carpets, and plush furniture. It looked comfortable and lived-in—like all houses with settled-in families looked. Her eyes went to a photo on their mantle of a pretty girl with large brown eyes and dark curly hair who shared Maisie's skin tone.

"That's our Rue," a deep baritone voice said behind her. She turned to see a tall man with Rue's eyes smiling down at her. "You must be Primrose. My name is Samuel Roberts. Welcome to our home."

"You can call me Prim, sir," she stammered to the kindly man.

"Okay then, I'll call you Prim, if you want—or will you allow me to call you something else?" he asked her with laughter in his voice.

Prim's mouth rose in a smile. She felt immediately comfortable with the man, his protective vibe radiating off of him. "As long as you give me the chance to veto your suggestions."

"Clever girl!" he responded. "On Game Night—you're on my team!"

"That's not fair, Daddy!" Prim turned to see Rue standing before them in a bright-yellow dress. "I was going to call dibs on Prim!" She turned to Prim and held out her hand confidently. "Rue Roberts. Pleased to meet you."

Prim shook the girl's hand. "Primrose Crane. Or Prim, if you prefer."

"Then, you will be my Prim," Rue told her as she took Prim's hand. "Mommy and Daddy host Game Night once a week. It's usually the three of us playing a board game—but now we can have team games! Like Charades or Win, Lose, or Draw!"

"Maisie cheats," Samuel told her in a loud voice, enough to catch Maisie's attention. "Just because she has those sweet ol' eyes, no one suspects her."

Maisie, who had been talking to Cressida, rushed over to them. "Don't tell Prim that!" She smacked her husband's arm playfully. "I play fair and square. It's _you_ who always steals from the bank when we play Monopoly!"

In response, Samuel placed an affectionate kiss on the top of his wife's head. Prim had never seen a couple who was so loving towards one another. Each foster home that she had been placed in had a couple who barely looked at one another.

"So, Prim," Maisie started with an anticipative smile. "Do you think that you'd like to stay with us for a while?"

Prim looked at the three of them with their welcoming smiles and joyful eyes.

And, she felt the hope bloom inside her chest—Prim wanted to belong to them.

Prim nodded excitedly, her smile becoming a grin. "Yes. I'd like that."

* * *

><p><em>One Year and Six Months Ago…<em>

"Wake up!" Rue shook her, a bright grin on her face.

Prim felt the dip in her mattress as someone jumped onto her twin bed. Opening one eye, she peeked to see her foster sister smiling down on her.

"It's too early for you to be so cheerful," Prim grumbled as she slowly sat up and gave Rue a smile.

"Oh, you're just sore because Daddy and I beat you at Scrabble!" Rue responded.

Prim crossed her arms. "I still maintain that 'jentacular' is a word!"

"Are we still arguing over this?" The girls looked up to see Samuel and Maisie in front of them. Prim's foster father was carrying a tray of pancakes with a candle stuck to the top. He winked at Prim. "Rosie, we won and you're just going to have to suck it up!"

After only two weeks, Samuel had started to call her 'Rose' instead of Primrose. Then, it had morphed into 'Rosie' as time passed. He was the only one who called her that and she didn't mind that at all.

He always bragged to those who would listen that he had a Rue and a Rosie—his two flower daughters.

"Happy Birthday, sweetheart," Maisie said as she sat next to Prim and gave her a hug. "I can't believe that you're sixteen. Feels like only yesterday that you were coming home to us…"

"Mama! You're going to soak Prim's pancakes!" Rue told her mother affectionately.

"Well Rosie, you better blow out your candle before we set off the fire alarm," Samuel told her. "Make a wish, our darling girl."

Looking at the candle in front of her, her eyes suddenly went up to her family, all excitedly watching her with love in their eyes.

Closing her eyes, Prim blew out the candle, her wish echoing in her mind:

_I wish for an unforgettable year._

* * *

><p>"HEY PRIM! RUE! WAIT UP!"<p>

"Oh God, it's Marvel…" Rue groaned and gave Prim a pained smile. They stopped in front of the entryway to their school. "Boy has a mad crush on you.'

"Rue, he's a nice boy," Prim told her. She looked at the lanky, awkward boy rushing towards them in a simple polo shirt and jeans, his smile eager as he approached her. "Marvel knows that we're just friends. I'm not interested in any boy at the moment."

Marvel reached them, breathless as he gave them a smile. "Hey Rue." He gave her foster sister a smile. Then, he turned to her, his blue eyes beaming. "Happy Birthday, Prim."

Prim looked at Rue pointedly, who just shrugged before turning to look the other way. No one knew about her birthday—unless her blabbermouth of a best friend suddenly spilt the beans.

"Thanks, Marvel," Prim told him. "It's not a big deal…"

He shook his head. "It's your sixteenth! And, in celebration…" Marvel handed her a wrapped package. "…your birthday present."

Prim looked at him in shock. "Marvel, this is too much!" She tried to give the package back. "I can't accept this."

"Prim." He pushed the package back at her. "I saw this and knew that it was meant to be yours."

"Open it already!" Rue told her with a grin, suddenly curious. "We'll be out here forever if you don't."

Prim, with a sigh, un-wrapped the package revealing a burgundy-colored hardbound book. Opening it, she looked at the title: _Jane Eyre_—her favorite book. She gasped when she saw one more thing listed on the front page.

"Marvel…this is a first edition," she informed him. "This is way too expensive."

"My family has the money," Marvel told her firmly. "So just think of it as adding to your extensive collection."

There was a slight brush of lips against her cheek and Prim spun around to see Cato, one of the seniors, grinning at her.

"Money isn't going to get you the girl," he informed Marvel, who went red. Cato put an arm around Prim. "Happy Birthday, gorgeous."

"Thanks," she managed to say softly, her own cheeks turning hot in embarrassment.

When they were all younger, all of them had played together—herself, Rue, Marvel, Clove and Glimmer, who were also seniors at their high school, as well as Cato. Back then, Prim did have a small crush on Cato, whose confidence and good looks were the bane of existence for a lot of girls.

"So, what did your dear friend get you?" Cato asked.

"First edition of _Jane Eyre_, my favorite book," Prim told him. Over Cato's shoulder, Rue shook her head and grinned at Prim's swooning.

"You're going have to tell me about it one of these days," Cato said, his mouth to her ear.

"It's about some orphan girl, who has to live in a dreary mansion," someone sneered from behind them.

Turning, Prim found Clove and Glimmer approaching her. Clove had steel in her eyes as she saw Cato's arm around Prim. It was an obvious fact that the small, dark-haired girl had a thing for Cato. Glimmer, who was Cato's cousin, gave her a kind smile.

"The whole orphan thing—rings a bell for you, doesn't it?" Clove asked, her mouth twisted in anger. "Is it true that all kids in foster care sleep in one bed? Your bed in Rue's house is your first lone one, right?"

"Are we still on this?" Rue suddenly interrupted, her voice hard. "Clove, get over yourself. Just because we don't all spend our time trying to look pretty for someone who doesn't want you—doesn't mean you have to dump on the rest of us."

"You want to mess with me?" Clove countered and Prim watched as Rue marched up to the girl, readiness in her eyes.

Prim stood in front of Clove to keep her friend away. "Stop." She looked pleadingly at Rue. "She's not worth it. It's my birthday…please."

Rue's eyes softened seeing her desperation. "Fine." The bell rang. "Come on. We're going to be late for English."

She nodded before turning to Marvel. "Thanks for the book." The boy gave her a small smile.

Glimmer and Clove walked past her.

"Happy Birthday, Prim," Glimmer called out before Clove yanked her arm to get her to move faster into the building. "OW!"

"I'm waiting for you to tell me about that book," Cato whispered. He moved away and winked at her. "See you later, birthday girl."

Prim smiled, the blush flowering on her face.

Maybe this year would be special.

* * *

><p>"Did you have a good birthday?" Maisie asked as she sat next to Prim in bed.<p>

Prim looked up at her foster mother and nodded with a smile. "It was the best birthday—so far. I'm looking forward to more…with my family."

Maisie leaned down to kiss her forehead. "God blessed us the day that he chose you to be part of our family." She cupped Prim's cheeks. "Good night, Prim."

"You forgot to tell Mama the best part of today," Rue said from her bed where Samuel also sat. "Cato, one the popular seniors, kissed Prim for her birthday."

"Oh, really now?" Samuel suddenly interjected with a playful glint in his eyes. He went over to Prim as Maisie went to Rue's bed. "What is this I'm hearing about you kissing boys?"

"It was just one boy, Sammy," Prim assured him with an easy smile. "One of many boys in my lifetime that I'll be kissing—until the real thing comes along."

"Just remember to choose the right ones," Samuel told her. "Because you're just not any girl—you're special."

"And, what am I? Chopped liver?" Rue joked from her bed.

"You are _both_ special," Samuel told them with an amused shake of the head. "But my point is—choose who you let into your heart carefully."

"Of course," Prim said. "I mean it took me awhile just to adjust to you three—but it was worth the time. Now, I can't see myself without you."

Samuel nodded before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Goodnight, Rosie."

Together, Maisie and Samuel walked to the doorway and shut off the light before closing the door.

Prim sighed contently, letting her eyes close.

"Prim?" She opened her eyes and turned to see Rue staring at her. "So what was it reallylike to be kissed by Cato?" She smiled excitedly at Prim. "I've had no kisses since Brenden Holt's party last year—and Brenden is a very bad kisser."

"It was only a kiss on the cheek," Prim told her best friend.

"Come on! Give me something…" Rue pouted. "I live vicariously through you!"

"Well…" Prim thought for a moment. "…it felt warm and nice. Also, it made me want more." She looked up at the ceiling. "But you know me—always wanting more."

There was a moment of silence.

"Do you think about your parents?" Rue suddenly asked. "I mean with today being your birthday and all?"

"All the time," Prim admitted. "It has nothing to do with you or your parents. But, I just want to know what kind of people they were. How my Mom was when she was pregnant with me. Was she excited? Was she scared? Did she know that she was going to die?"

"She was brave," Rue told her sincerely. Prim met her friend's eyes, the sudden tears falling down her face. Seeing them, Rue jumped from her own bed and scooted in with Prim. "Those kinds of health issues always have risks and despite knowing that she might have been too weak to keep you—she still wanted you. God just wanted her more."

There was always that small thought in her mind that maybe she wasn't worth it; that there had been some huge cosmic mistake when it came down to her. Why was she spared while her mother made the ultimate sacrifice? Was it really fair that her father—a nameless, faceless figure—had to lose his wife?

"But, I needed her more," Prim choked out. "Because I don't know who I'm looking at when I look in the mirror." She turned to meet Rue's eyes. "And, I feel so empty."

Rue pulled her close. "One day, you're going to know exactly who you are and what you want. I think a lot of teenagers go through this phase."

Prim gave her a doleful smile. "I feel like I've been going through this since I could remember."

"Maybe you need to get Cato to kiss you more," Rue suggested with a grin. "If not, I'm sure that Marvel would love to make you feel better."

The two girls went silent before bursting into a fit of laughter.

"This has been the most interesting birthday!" Prim gasped in-between her chuckles.

"But we got here together," Rue told her. "Now let's hope that for _my_ birthday—Cato slips me the tongue!"

* * *

><p><em>One year ago…<em>

"It's so hot out here!" Rue called out from her bike. "Why did we decide to go out in this weather again?"

"Because, we don't have a car to drive to the water park like the rest of the kids!" Prim responded as she pedaled on her own bike. "So we have to swim in the lake!"

"Whatever!" Rue scoffed as they made a turn into the forest clearing. "Who the hell wants chlorine in their hair anyway?"

The two girls rode their bikes further into the forest before parking them against the trees adjacent to one another. Quickly, they removed their shorts and shirts until they were down to their bathing suits, a dark navy bikini for Rue and cherry red one-piece for Prim.

"When did you get the boobs?" Prim asked her friend, shocked at seeing Rue's much fuller chest. She looked down at her own slight cleavage. "These things will never grow!"

Rue took her hand before running with her towards the lake in front of them. "MAYBE THEY NEED SOME WATER AND SUN!"

They ran into the water and Prim squealed at the icy cold water hitting her bare skin. She looked over at Rue and pushed water at her friend with a grin.

"Very funny!" Prim told her as Rue tried to shield herself. "IS THAT ENOUGH WATER?"

"WE'RE TALKING ABOUT YOUR CHEST, NOT MINE!" Rue responded before she began her own water attack on Prim.

After tiring out, the two decided to swim to a set of rocks at the deeper end of the lake. The spot was a shaded and gave them a chance to cool off on the smooth, flat part of the boulders.

Rue yawned from her rock. "Five minutes of swimming and I'm already tired."

Prim closed her eyes. "It's the heat—feeling a little lazy myself." She let her body relax as they both went silent, lost in their own thoughts.

"You never did tell me about _Jane Eyre_," a voice whispered in her ear.

She opened her eyes to find Cato staring down at her, a handsome grin on his face.

Prim scrambled up in shock, "AHHH!"

Rue quickly sat up to see Prim next to her crush on the rock. "Holy shit, Cato! Where the hell did you come from?"

"Language, Miss Roberts," Cato scolded jokingly. "I was driving back home with Marvel over there—" He nodded his head to across the lake where they spotted Marvel by the spot where their bikes were. "And, we heard some shouting. He mentioned that you two liked to go swimming here, so I decided to join."

"I didn't know that you and Marvel were such bosom buddies," Prim remarked.

"We live next door to each other," Cato informed her. "I thought he would've told you that."

Prim shook her head. "Never said anything to me."

"Must not like the competition," Rue remarked as she laid back down on her rock.

"He's not much competition," Cato retorted. His eyes met Prim's. "Is he?"

Prim shook her head, her smile slowly widening. "No."

"You want to go for a swim?" he suddenly asked. Prim realized that he, too, was in his swimwear; a pair of dark swimming trunks and nothing else. "I mean, what's the point of being at a lake if you aren't in the water?"

"Growing purposes," Prim replied and Rue let out a snort.

Cato stared at her curiously, "What?"

She smiled at him once more. "Just a little joke between us." Prim looked to her friend. "Want to join us?"

"No." Rue winked at her. "I prefer to relax right here."

"I guess it's just you and me, gorgeous." Cato took her hand. "Together?"

Prim squeezed his hand in solidarity. "Together."

She closed her eyes as they jumped. The water came without warning and as Prim rose up, she found herself face to face with Cato.

Prim stared at the icy-blue eyes and the light smattering of freckles on his cheeks before her eyes wandered to the bottom half of his face.

"What?" Cato asked in a tight voice.

"You have a little bit of a mustache," Prim said as her eyes roved over his upper lip.

The kiss happened quickly.

One minute, she was looking at the tiny hairs of his mustache and the next moment, she was tasting Cato and the fresh water of the lake. Even in the coolness of the water, Prim could feel the heat traveling through her body as Cato's arms encircled her waist to pull her closer.

Besides the heat, she could also feel something hard against her waist.

Slowly, Prim pulled away. "We should stop."

Her eyes went behind Cato's head where she found Marvel staring at them, a strange expression on his face.

Her body went ice cold.

Cato's slow exhale brought her attention back to him. "Sorry—that got out of hand." He grinned at her. "I had ulterior motives."

Prim tilted her head interestedly at his words. "What?"

"Prom in a month." Cato looked down at the water before meeting her eyes nervously. "Go with me?"

She looked at him in shock. "But, I'm a junior."

"Yeah, so?" he responded. "That won't matter because you're with me. Also, Marvel is going to be throwing a little party at his place after—and he'll need someone to help him serve pretzels. I volunteered us both—so you have to come."

"I don't have a dress," Prim argued.

"Wear a paper bag for all I care," Cato declared. "You're still going to be ten times more beautiful than any of the other girls there." He pressed a gentle kiss to her damp lips. "Say yes."

Prim gazed at his longing eyes before finally nodding.

"Yes."

* * *

><p><em>Eleven Months Ago…<em>

"Just enough blush to give you that natural flush," Rue said as she swiped the brush against the apples of Prim's cheeks. "But, not too much to make you look like you're working the streets."

"Rue!" her mother scolded, a small grin playing on her lips. She carefully arranged the low bun on the nape of Prim's neck. "The mouth on you!"

"I think I balanced her makeup out perfectly," Rue responded with a small smile. She leaned down so that she was at face-level with her friend. "You look pretty."

"Are you really okay with not going? You can always go to Marvel's party," Prim offered. Rue had not been asked to this prom, which wasn't uncommon. Their actual prom would be next year. She had been the rare instance of juniors attending—along with Marvel, who would be escorting Glimmer. "I hate that you're not coming with us."

"It's okay," Rue assured her with a grin. "I plan to catch up on my bad television, read a bit, and then pass out on a junk food coma. So, remember everything, Cinderella—because I want details."

"Rue, can I talk to Prim for a moment?" Maisie asked. Her daughter nodded, giving Prim a quick smile, before exiting the room. Pulling the chair from the corner of the room, Maisie sat down next to Prim. "I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"I'm excited, but scared," Prim told her. "I like Cato a lot. I haven't really liked a boy before so it's all a bit new to me." She took in a shaky breath. "I've always kind of felt like I never belonged and now I feel like I do."

"That's wonderful, sweetheart," Maisie said fondly. "I just wanted to make sure that everything was okay. I know I'm not your real mother but I think I've known you long enough to sense that there was always something inside of you that's been looking for family—for somewhere to belong, and I worry that it keeps you from fully accepting us."

"I don't want you to think that I don't care," Prim said. "But, I guess I've always felt a little…empty." She couldn't quite describe that loneliness inside her. "Maybe I'm hoping that despite my father giving me away, someone out there is looking for me."

"Did you want to start looking after you've graduated?" Maisie offered. "Your records will be open."

"I don't know," she said to her foster mother. "You, Sammy, and Rue are my family."

Maisie's dark eyes dampened at her words. "That's wonderful…because now that you're going to prom and getting ready to apply to colleges, Samuel and I were thinking that maybe you'd consider changing your last name to Roberts—so that it's on your diploma and everything."

Prim felt her own eyes starting to fill. "I think that would be perfect." She reached over to embrace her foster mother. "Thanks…Mom."

"Of course, baby," Maisie whispered into her ear. Pulling away, she beamed at Prim through her tears. "I'm supposed to be having a woman talk with you—being your prom and all."

"Don't worry." Prim blushed at the thought. "Cato has been surprisingly sweet about all of that. Not that we've really talked about it. I'm not even sure if I'm his girlfriend."

The doorbell rang and she stood up anxiously. Maisie took her hand and squeezed it gently.

"In that dress, I think he's going to definitely stake claim on you." Maisie looked at the cream silk organza dress with the hand-painted pink flowers that Prim wore. "That dress never fit me like it fits you."

"The tulle underneath feels a little itchy," Prim said as they walked out into the hallway. "I hope that I can make it through the night."

They entered the living room where she found Cato, looking handsome in his black tuxedo, on the couch, next to Rue and Samuel.

When he spotted her, Cato immediately leapt from his seat, his eyes looking over her dress before finally meeting her eyes.

"Wow." Cato's lips rose as he stared at her. "You are beautiful."

"If I was going to the prom with someone as handsome as him," Maisie whispered in her ear. "I think that I could make it through the night."

* * *

><p>"PRIM!" She turned to see Glimmer and Marvel walking towards her and Cato. The pretty blonde looked admiringly over her dress. "I love your dress—silk organza, right? And the flowers look hand-painted."<p>

"Impressive," Prim said to her. "It's my mother's. I didn't know that you were into vintage clothing."

"I'm into fashion in general," the girl responded with an excited smile. "I applied to Parsons in New York and I'm hoping that I'll hear something from them by the end of the month."

"Well, you could get in on your dress alone," Prim said as she stared at Glimmer's slinky gold dress with sewn-in gold plates.

"I constructed the whole dress myself." Glimmer twirled excitedly. "You have a good eye."

Prim smiled gratefully at her. "Thanks. I think you're going to get into Parsons."

"Fingers crossed," the girl said. "I'm going to go say hi to Clove. She's been glaring at me for the last ten minutes. She's very possessive."

She chuckled at Glimmer's words. "I never noticed."

Marvel, who had been talking to Cato, turned to her. His blue eyes roamed over her and he gave her a small smile. Something in her chilled, but she shook it off. Marvel was her friend and he did have a bit of a crush on her at one point—but that was all over now.

However, Prim never forgot the look on his face after she had kissed Cato for the first time.

"You look great," Marvel said to her. "Save me a dance if you get a chance."

Cato draped an arm around her shoulders. "Sorry man, but she's going to be busy…with me." He pressed a kiss to her lips. "Dance with me?"

She nodded before turning to Marvel. "Can we hang out at your party later?"

He gave her a weak smile. "Sure. We can have a soda or something."

* * *

><p>"You having a good time, Princess?" Cato asked her as they slow danced on the wooden floor of the gym.<p>

"Why do you call me that?" Prim asked him.

He pulled her closer. "Because you are one—to me."

"Do Princesses get special treatment from you?" she teased.

Cato sighed dramatically. "They do, especially if that particular princess is my girlfriend."

Prim stopped in place, her mind shocked at his words. "What?"

He grinned at her. "Prim, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

Throwing her arms around him, Prim pulled him into a kiss and his arms pulled her close as he lifted her feet off the ground and twirled her around the floor. She laughed as her lips danced across his, full of excitement and euphoria.

"So I'm assuming that's a yes?" Cato said as he set her down, a bright grin on his own handsome face.

"Hell yes," Prim responded before kissing him once more.

* * *

><p>"I've never been to this side of town," Prim said as Cato helped her out of his car, a silver BMW.<p>

"You've never been to Marvel's house?" he asked her curiously. "I thought you hung out all the time."

"At school," she responded as she looked around the cul-de-sac of mansions. "Or, we would just go to the library."

"Well, the house with all the teenagers running into it is Marvel's house," Cato started as he pointed at the large brick house in front of them. "That house to the left of it is mine and the one on the farther end is Glimmer's." He grimaced and turned her around to the large white mansion. "That place is Clove's."

"I didn't realize that you all lived so close," she said as they walked toward Marvel's house. "You always used to hang out in our neighborhood."

"Well, when you first came to Capitol, Marvel kept on talking about some pretty blonde that was living with the Roberts family," he recalled. "The curiosity got the best of us one day and we ended up riding our bikes over to your neighborhood."

"Didn't know that I was so mystifying," she joked.

Through her peripheral, Prim caught sight of Glimmer walking towards her house. She looked upset, her steps rushed and her arms crossed.

"Go ahead," Prim told Cato. "I'm going to check on something." He kissed her cheek before joining a group of people heading into Marvel's house. Rushing over to the blonde girl, she waved her hands to get her attention. "GLIMMER!" The girl turned to her, a distraught look on her face. "Are you okay?"

"Marvel and I just had a fight," she told Prim, a haunted look in her eyes. "And, I don't feel much like partying."

"You two are the nicest couple that I know." Prim put a hand on her shoulder. "I can't imagine you two fighting."

"People aren't always what they seem," Glimmer replied under her breath. She suddenly whipped her head up, her dark blue eyes serious. "Just don't go anywhere alone with Marvel, okay?"

"Of course," Prim said and smiled at her. Reaching forward, she pulled Glimmer in to give her a hug. The girl was so upset that she was shaking but after a few moments, she returned Prim's embrace. "Don't worry about me. I've been through enough in my life and I know how to take care of myself. Also, Cato will protect me."

"Sure," came the uncertain response as they pulled apart.

"PRIM!" She turned to see Cato waving her back to him.

"I better go," Prim told the girl. "Let's have coffee or something this weekend. We can talk about whatever is going on."

Glimmer hesitated for a moment. "Sure. Just remember what I said."

* * *

><p>"<em>Party rock is in the house tonight<br>Everybody just have a good time…."_

Prim could hardly hear anything that anyone was saying. The speakers were a few feet away from her as she sat on Cato's lap. He had introduced her to some of his friends who had come from another school in District 1, which was in the town next to Capitol.

"I'm going to use the bathroom," she yelled into Cato's ear. "I'll be back."

Cato nodded before brushing her lips quickly. "Don't be too long."

She smiled before getting up. Heading out of the living room, Prim went past the stairs leading to the 2nd Floor and towards the hallway where she remembered seeing a bathroom. Pictures were littered along the walls and she found herself looking at the small framed photos.

Prim stopped suddenly and peered at a picture that had been taken when she first came to Capitol. It was of her, Rue, and Marvel along with Cato, Clove, and Glimmer. They were all grinning from ear to ear.

There was one thing that bothered her—while everyone was staring at the camera, Marvel was staring at _her_.

"Nice picture, huh?" Prim whipped around to see Marvel grinning at her. "It was our first group picture."

Glimmer's words echoed in her head and she gave him an anxious smile. "Funny how everything's changed," she told him. "I think that was the last time that I ever hung out with Clove on friendly terms." Taking a breath, Prim gave Marvel a smile. "What's up?"

"We should hang out a little at my party," he told her, his cheeks scarlet. "I have some alcohol in my system and I want to at least talk to you while I'm a little less slurred." Marvel nodded towards the kitchen. "Let's go have a drink—" She raised her brows. "—only soda."

She nodded in agreement after a moment. At least in the kitchen, they wouldn't be alone.

Prim followed him towards the kitchen and hopped onto the counter when the entered. Marvel reached down into a large red bucket on the kitchen floor and retrieved two cans, handing one to her as he placed his on the counter.

Opening her can, Prim realized that she had a Coke can. She had always hated Coke.

"Can we trade?" she asked Marvel, eyeing his Pepsi.

"I didn't realize—" Marvel handed her the can and took hers. "Cheers."

Taking a sip from her can, Prim gave her friend a smile. "So what happened with you and Glimmer?"

"We had a disagreement about relationships," he told her, a frown marring his face.

"Seriously?" Prim replied. "Why would you disagree on your relationship? She's a great girl."

"I know she is," Marvel said as he took another sip from his can. "But, it wasn't our relationship that we were talking about." He turned to her, sadness radiating from his eyes. "I really am happy for you though…"

"Marvel…" Prim took a long gulp from her can before placing it on the counter. "I guess I've been ignoring what was obviously in front of me. But, we've been friends for so long and I never—"

He held up his hand to stop her apologetic rant. "We're cool. Just don't kiss Cato in front of me too much."

"Agreed." She leaned over to kiss his cheek. "I have to use the bathroom. Call Glimmer tomorrow and make up, okay? I really like her."

Marvel nodded and gave her a smile. "I will. Now go use the bathroom before you ruin my floor. I'll get rid of the rest of your drink."

* * *

><p>The bathroom on the first floor was occupied by two people who obviously weren't washing their hands, so Prim went upstairs through the crowded hallway and into an unoccupied bathroom. The lights were unbearably bright, so she searched for the dimmer and lowered them before quickly using the bathroom.<p>

Her hands felt strangely numb as she ran them under cold water of the faucet. The feeling spread to her face and she could feel her heart thumping harshly against her chest.

Something was wrong.

Someone pounded against the door and Prim quickly opened it, pushing past the person as she scrambled out and into the hallway.

The lights were still too bright.

Prim went to the first door that she could find and was relieved to see that the bedroom was empty. Quickly, she pulled off her shoes before landing on the soft bed, sighing in contentment at the smell of soft, clean sheets.

She was asleep before she could even blink.

* * *

><p>Prim awoke to Cato pressing his lips to hers.<p>

"You went missing," he said against her mouth. "I got worried."

"Sorry," she mumbled. "I wasn't feeling too hot. So, I just fell asleep here." Prim gave him a sleepy smile. "Didn't mean to freak you out."

He chuckled softly, his hand running over the skirt of her dress before reaching under it to slide his hand up her outer thigh. "It's okay. We can just hang out here."

Prim shook her head. "They'll know we're missing…" She attempted to sit up but Cato pushed her down, his hand roughly pressing down on her shoulder. "That hurt. What are you doing?"

"This is prom night, sweetheart," Cato told her, his alcohol-soaked breath heavy against her face. She could feel that sudden anxiety gathering in her middle. "It's just supposed to happen—and you're my girlfriend."

"I'm not ready," Prim told him hurriedly. "Not yet—"

She was cut off by his mouth on hers, his harsh movement against her lips covering her protest

One thought whirred through her mind, '_This is wrong…this is wrong…this is wrong…'_

Cato ripped his mouth away before placing his hand firmly over her own mouth. "You're gorgeous, you know that right?" His hand went under her dress once more. "But, you're a fucking tease, too."

Fighting to push him off her, she twisted her body frantically to move away or at least to remove his palm from her mouth so she could scream.

Behind the door, she could hear the sound of laughter and the hard pounding of the bass from the stereo in the living room.

"Come on, sweetheart," Cato whispered. "Open up for me."

Instinctively, Prim locked his hand in-between her thighs and he yelped in pain.

Cato's face contorted into a sneer. "You little bitch…you're going to get it!"

His fingers yanked at her panties and they ripped easily at his rough action. He wasn't gentle as he delved into her center; she was painfully dry but it didn't seem to deter his movements.

There was a knock on the door and quickly someone else entered the room. Prim struggled to turn her head but Cato held her close, shielding her from seeing the person as the door was locked shut.

'_This is wrong…_'

She cried out into Cato's hand as he continue to push his coarse fingers into her, tears and sweat running down her face.

"The camera's ready," the other person suddenly said, his familiar voice quiet and shaking with guilt.

She could hear the beep of the camera.

"Now, be a good girl." He pinched her thigh harshly and she cried out from behind his hand. "Make it look good for the camera."

Cato deftly undid his pants, the clank of his belt echoing in her ears. "Prim…you're my girl," he told her. She shifted her hips away trying to get away from him. "I'm going to make sure that you have a good time. You just have to stop fighting me."

Feeling his bare pelvis against her own, she had no chance to react as Cato thrust into her. The pain of her barrier breaking caused her to cry out into his hand and her hips instinctively moved up to meet his.

"You _do_ like it," Cato said into her ear as he moved against her. She shook her head. "Clove was right—girls in the system—they'll do just about anything to please you."

* * *

><p>Prim didn't know when she passed out.<p>

However, when she awoke, her eyes looked up in shock—Cato was no longer on top of her and moving inside her.

Instead, Marvel was.

The house was silent now.

She had not been smart enough to heed Glimmer's warning. She was now alone with Marvel.

"You were supposed to be with me!" he yelled. "I've always wanted you, Prim…"

Heavy sobs escaped his mouth as Marvel continued his assault; his hand on her mouth the entire time.

Her eyes stared at the boy on top of her—the one who had been her friend since she had come to Capitol.

In the darkness, she could see nothing but the glazed, empty look in his eyes.

The same look that he had given her on the day that she had kissed Cato.

"You shouldn't have kissed him," Marvel blubbered into her hair. "He knew that I wanted you—and he took you. You let him—you stupid idiot!"

He moved faster, beads of sweat running down his temples and hitting the silk of her once beautiful dress.

"You're mine!" His hand dropped from her mouth. "SAY IT!"

She resisted. "NO!"

Her hands struggled to push him away though the movements felt heavy and exhausting. Marvel paid no mind, instead thrusting up into her already pained core; the rapid movements causing the headboard to bang against the wall behind her.

Three loud bangs later and he had finished.

Prim could feel the wetness in-between her legs as he rested on top of her.

As Marvel sat up, he seemed to snap out of his manic spell.

Slowly standing, he zipped himself up before turning to her.

"I can take you home," Marvel offered breathlessly.

Prim shook her head stiffly as she sat up, unable to meet his eyes. "Just get out."

She waited until she heard the door close behind him before looking around the empty room; its walls the only witnesses to what had happened.

Actually, the walls and the camera that was no longer in the room.

Prim let out a sob.

* * *

><p>She had enough money to call for a taxi.<p>

Rushing out of the silent house, Prim made her way onto the porch and out to the sidewalk. Her eyes went to Cato's house for a moment and she contemplated knocking on the door to confront him.

But her mind felt so muddled and confused, she just wanted to go home and shower—forever.

"PRIM!" She turned to find a sweater-clad Glimmer running towards her. Judging from the look on the girl's face, Prim looked as bad as she felt. "What did he do to you?"

"You knew?" Prim asked as she backed away from Glimmer. "You knew that Cato and Marvel were going to—"

"Cato?" Glimmer shook her head in disbelief. "I had a feeling that Marvel had something planned. He kept on muttering something about you and Cato while we were driving over here. I told Marvel that he shouldn't get in-between you two—that only made him angrier."

Glimmer put a hand on her shoulder and Prim recoiled at her touch, a small whimper escaping her mouth.

Cato had been very rough in his restraint.

"We need to go to the police," Glimmer urged her.

_Flashing lights…Effie's cold skin…_

"N-N-No," Prim wavered. "No police—please. I can't do that to the Roberts. I can't bring this to Rue." She looked around, suddenly very anxious at being out in the open. "Can I use your phone to call a taxi?"

Glimmer looked at her for a long moment before finally nodding.

"I'll take you home," she offered gently. "You can borrow some clothes and take a shower, if you want."

"Okay," Prim replied feebly.

Together, the two girls walked back to Glimmer's house in silence.

* * *

><p>"Miss Crane, did you hear me?"<p>

Prim pulled her eyes away from the poster behind the woman in front of her. She had a hard time focusing lately, her thoughts jumbled since_ that_ night.

"What?" she responded tiredly from where she sat on the exam table.

"Pregnant," the nurse informed her. "Do you remember the first day of your last period?"

"Uh…" Prim shook her head, her hands fidgeting in her lap. "…some time two months ago?"

The nurse continued to write on her clipboard. "And, the father? Is he aware of this?"

Her head snapped up at the word 'father'. "No. I don't want him to know."

"That is perfectly fine," the woman responded, her eyes wary at Prim's hard response. "We'll need to do an ultrasound to see how far along you are."

"Okay," Prim told her. "Then what?"

"You can discuss your options with your doctor," the nurse responded. "She should be in with you in a few minutes."

Prim nodded and the woman quickly left. She probably couldn't stand to be around the quivering mass that was herself.

Prim could understand that. Sometimes, she wanted to crawl out of her own skin.

Her cell phone vibrated and she looked to see Rue's phone number. Quickly, she picked up. "Hello?"

"Are you okay?" Rue asked her. "What's going on?"

"I'm…" She couldn't bring herself to say the words, her throat choked. "…please don't hate me."

"I could never hate you," her friend reassured her. "I know that I was upset that you didn't tell me what happened until now—but I also understand that you've had a hard time processing everything. You really need to talk to someone about this because Mom and Dad are starting to notice. Also, what Cato and Marvel did to you, it wasn't right—"

"I'm going to take care of it, okay?" Prim told her hastily. "Then, we can move on and pretend that this never happened." The door knob turned. "I have to go."

Hanging up quickly, a petite dark-skinned woman stepped into the room. "Primrose?"

Prim nodded and the woman gave her a smile. "Doctor Octavia Reynolds. I'll be your obstetrician." She looked at Prim's chart. "So, we're going to be doing an ultrasound to determine how long you've been pregnant." The doctor pulled out the set of stirrups from the exam table. "I'll need you to put your feet in and just lay back."

Prim did what was instructed of her as the doctor washed her hands. After she was settled, Dr. Reynolds went to the machine, next to the table and began to set up.

"I'm going to go in with a vaginal camera since it looks like you might not be too far along," the doctor informed her.

"Sure," she said dully.

Prim didn't feel the probe go in, her body numb from it all. Had it been two months since everything had changed? She didn't go to school the Monday after all of it had happened, claiming to not feel well but really wanting to avoid Cato and Marvel.

Then one day, she _really_ didn't feel well.

Rue had caught her throwing up and after much urging; Prim finally told her what had happened. She had never seen Rue look so small; it was as if her story had aged her best friend in only a matter of minutes.

"Looks like you're about eight weeks," Dr. Reynolds informed her. The doctor met her eyes. "I can print photos if you want."

Prim shook her head and turned away from the screen. "I'm not keeping it."

She closed her eyes and took a shaky breath to calm the tears that rose from her chest.

The doctor nodded understandingly. "You're young. I get that. But, I need you to give yourself time to think about it," she said to Prim. "Because for someone who says they don't want this, you don't seem very convincing."

* * *

><p>As Prim walked out of the school's bathroom, she felt her stomach drop seeing Marvel in front of her.<p>

"Prim—" She sidestepped him but he reacted quickly. "—talk to me."

"I swear, I'll scream," Prim hissed.

"I understand," he replied anxiously. Marvel looked around before turning to her. "Is it true?"

Prim froze in her steps. "What?"

"Clove saw you coming out of a Planned Parenthood," he informed her. "Are you…?"

"I won't be soon," she told him before rushing past him. "I have to go!"

"PRIM! WAIT!" Marvel stopped in front of her, his eyes desperate. "You don't have to do this. I have money. We can get married. We can have this baby and be a family—"

"ARE YOU INSANE?" she suddenly screamed at him. "Do you _really_ think I want something that I'm not sure is his or yours? I don't want this thing growing inside of me. It's like poison! Since that night, I've been slowly dying inside! Do you think for one moment that I would want to start a family with someone who violated me the way that you did?" Prim slowly back away from him. "You're fucked up and you need to get out of my face."

Turning, Prim rushed out of the hallway and toward her locker. Quickly, she deposited her books before taking her phone out and dialing.

Prim waited, her nerves shaken, until she heard someone pick up.

"Hi, I'm a patient of Dr. Reynolds," she began. "I'd like to make an appointment."

* * *

><p><em>Eight Months Ago…<em>

"This procedure takes about five to fifteen minutes," Dr. Reynolds informed her from where she stood next to Prim. "I'm going to first insert a speculum into your vagina. Then, I'm going to clean out your cervix and vagina with some anti-septic before injecting a local anesthetic into your cervix."

Prim grimaced at her words, but let her continue. "After inserting a small tube through the cervix and into the uterus, I'll then use a syringe to suction out the tissue of the uterus. You might feel some cramping but that's normal and usually subsides when I remove the tube."

"Then…that's it?" Prim said to her. "It's all over?"

The doctor nodded. "Physically, yes." She looked at Prim worriedly. "But, you're going to need a lot of mental support, too. Deciding to not have a child can be a difficult process."

"No, it's about making a choice," Prim told her. "I'm doing the best thing for it. What should've been done to me."

"I don't understand," her doctor replied.

"I don't feel like explaining," she said with a sigh. "Please, let's just start."

Dr. Reynolds gave her a final nod before sitting in front of Prim's open legs. "I'm going to start. First, the speculum…"

* * *

><p>When Prim opened her eyes, she was surrounded by light.<p>

Her eyes slowly adjusted and Prim looked to see that she was no longer in the clinic. Dr. Reynolds was gone and in front of her were her blanketed legs.

She groaned and there was a gasp to her side.

"Prim?" Rue was suddenly in front of her face, tears running down her cheeks. "You're awake!"

"Where am I?" she asked as she looked at the machine next to her.

"Capitol Hospital," Rue informed her. "You've been out for two days."

"What?" Prim tried to sit up but the sudden pain in her belly stopped her. "Why?"

"During your procedure, you started to hemorrhage," her friend said, her voice choked with tears. "When you started to seize, they called an ambulance to have you taken here." She kissed the top of Prim's head. "I don't think I've ever been that scared. I was waiting for you and all of a sudden, I heard one of the nurses call for the front desk to call an ambulance."

"I'm fine," Prim assured her distraught friend. She looked down at her stomach. "Am I still…?"

"No," Rue said as she wiped her eyes. "You were lucky. They said that if you hemorrhaged any longer then it would have stopped you from having any children—ever."

The room door opened as Maisie and Samuel rushed in. Her foster parents were immediately by her side, their arms protectively wrapped around her gaunt body.

"Baby!" Maisie cried as she kissed her cheeks. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Samuel took her hand, his own eyes rimmed with red. "We could've helped you—talked to Cato and worked something out."

Prim shook her head. "It was too complicated," she told them. Prim closed her eyes, tears spilling onto her cheeks. "I thought that I could fix this, that I could ignore it. But now, I don't know anything."

"What happened?" Maisie sat down in the chair, next to her. "Please, let us help you."

Her foster father remained silent, his hand covering her own. Rue sat at the end of the bed.

"I-I-It was my fault!" Prim looked down as the sobs took over, her shoulders quaking as she began to cry in earnest. She looked up at Samuel. "Sammy, I chose wrong! I CHOSE WRONG!"

The man reached forward to gather her in his arms as his own chest began to rumble with tears.

* * *

><p>The next time that Prim opened her eyes, Cressida was sitting in front of her.<p>

"Cressida?" she said tiredly. The nurses had given her a sedative to calm her down; a raised blood pressure wasn't good seeing as she was recovering from almost bleeding to death. Prim had fallen asleep quickly—her last conscious thought about being home and safe in her bed.

"Hey kid," Cressida replied hoarsely. She stood up and gave Prim a sad smile. "These are shitty circumstances to reunite under."

"I'm not a kid anymore," Prim told her quietly. "I haven't been for a long time." She closed her eyes suddenly remembering Effie's gentle smile. "Not since I killed my mother."

"What are you talking about?" her friend asked worriedly.

"She gave birth to me and it killed her," she replied. "Maybe I should've had this baby and it would've killed me, too—complete the cycle and all." Her eyes filled with tears. "But, I couldn't do that to a kid; let it live knowing that it was a product of rape. Worst of all, I don't know who the father was. I don't think I could've stood to look at a child and seeing my rapist's eyes."

Cato had completely acted as if nothing had happened; his eyes sometimes meeting hers across the cafeteria to wink salaciously. He had hooked up with Clove directly after everything that had happened.

Then there was Marvel—his muddled eyes desperately boring into hers during classes or in the hallways. After he had confronted her in school, Prim had taken every precaution to never be alone at school. She would wait until she was home to use the bathroom just to keep safe.

Her life wasn't hers anymore. Her life was that night—and its repercussions.

"Your foster parents are talking to the school," Cressida told her. "Rue made an official report and somebody corroborated it. These boys are going to jail and you're going to get justice."

"You think that matters?" Prim replied bitingly. "The police are going to arrest two of Capitol's golden boys—the all-American senior with the football scholarship and the science wiz, who was already being recruited by Brown, Stanford and Yale. Then, there's me—the girl in the system. My own father didn't want me." She took a breath. "Cato was right."

Cressida looked to her, "Right about what?"

"That I'm desperate to please anyone," Prim said simply. "I'm desperate to be loved. So desperate that I'll stay quiet."

"You can't live like this, Prim," the woman in front of her pleaded. "You need help, sweetheart. Before it's too late."

"I think it's already too late," Prim told her. She closed her eyes. "I'm tired now."

* * *

><p>"What are you doing here?" Prim stared at the golden-haired girl in her bedroom. "Haven't we shared enough good times together?"<p>

"I need to show you something," Glimmer said, her eyes bloodshot. "But, first things first—I was the second person to report Cato and Marvel." She swallowed harshly. "I think that Marvel was waiting for the other shoe to drop but it came out of nowhere for Cato…and Clove."

"Clove?" Prim sat up. "What does she have to do with this?"

"She was the one that provided Marvel with the drug that made you sick that night," Glimmer explained. "You were totally incapacitated. Despite fighting, you wouldn't have had any strength in your favor."

She thought about that night, about Marvel, and about their drink. "But we switched cans…"

"It's common knowledge that you have a soda preference," her friend replied. "Especially for someone as into you as Marvel was. Why would he give you the wrong can?"

"To throw me off," Prim said slowly. "The bastard."

"Cato played on his crush, told Marvel that he would break you in, and break your heart," Glimmer said softly, her voice cracking. "Then, you would run into Marvel's arms. The problem was that Cato took it too far and Marvel was angry."

"And the video tape?" Prim's eyes closed, her memory wandering to the sound of a recording beep.

"So you wouldn't rat any of them out," the girl replied. "The police have it now." Glimmer took a breath. "Prim…Marvel, after all of it came out—he went home and—" She let out a sob. "His parents found him in his closet. The video tape was on his bed with his confession."

Prim felt the breath rush out of her. She put a hand to her still healing abdomen. "He's—"

Glimmer nodded and she met Prim's eyes. "He wasn't a bad person, Prim," she told her in a trembling voice. "Just confused and desperately in love with you. Cato and Clove used it to their advantage—it was what got them off. You and Marvel were nothing but pieces in their twisted game." She took a deep breath. "He left you a note."

Glimmer sat on her bed and placed the note on her lap.

With shaky hands, Prim unfolded the paper to read the shaky writing: '_Prim, I'm sorry.—Marvel'_

The simple sad message pierced through her heart and she was suddenly sobbing into her hands.

How quickly everything had changed for her—for all of them.

She hadn't been able to leave her room in the Roberts house. They were harassed daily by those who supported Cato, Clove, and Marvel—beautiful, perfect children of the Capitol elite. People threw eggs at the Roberts house and Rue came home each day from school, a little more bedraggled.

However, her foster family never uttered a crossed word at her. Instead, they only loved her harder.

She had been seeing a therapist who came to the house on Cressida's recommendation. Dr. Aurelius was a nice enough man, but even he had to admit that she wouldn't progress overnight.

But, Prim needed to.

Her seventeenth birthday had come and so had some news.

Maisie had often done research on foster care and during one of her searches had come across a boy looking for a seventeen-year-old who was believed to be named Primrose.

She couldn't believe it at first, but a recent DNA test had confirmed it.

She had a brother.

"Are you alright?" Glimmer asked her as Prim calmed down.

"It's just seems so strange how life can move from one thing to another," Prim told her. "I've always been moving about—and I'm tired of it. I want somewhere to just…stay."

"I heard that you're leaving in a few months," Glimmer said and she nodded.

"Going to California," she told the girl.

"I got early admission to Parsons," Glimmer informed her. "I'll be leaving right after my graduation so I can start during their summer session."

"You're going to be great," Prim said. Slowly, she sat up and walked across the room to her bookshelf. Pulling out the burgundy hard-covered book, Prim went to Glimmer and held it out to her. "You should have this—to remember him. And, to remember me."

"I don't think I could ever forget you," Glimmer told her in a tight voice as she took the copy of _Jane Eyre_. "You're more special than you realize." She embraced Prim gently. "Take care of yourself in California."

"Do me a favor." Prim said as they pulled away. "Watch over Rue for me?"

"Of course," Glimmer assured her. "Will I see you around?"

"Probably not," she told the girl. "I need some time before I leave."

* * *

><p><em>Six months ago…<em>

_**Norfolk International Airport**_

"Peeta will meet you at baggage claim," Maisie told her. She gave Prim a nervous smile. "You're going to be alright."

"I really hope that he's likes me," Prim told them.

"He's going to love you," Samuel told her. "How could he resist those eyes and that smile?" He pressed a finger into her dimple crease. "Just try smiling a little more often."

"I will," Prim told him. She turned to Rue, who gave her a shaky smile. Holding out her arms, her foster sister rushed into them. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you more," Rue said as they held each other tightly. "Take some time to get to know your new family." Slowly, she pulled away from Prim. "I'll understand if you can't call for awhile. You need this time with them."

An announcement rang over the intercom, _"Flight 768 to San Francisco is at Gate A7…"_

Prim looked past where the inspection gates were. "That's me." She reached out and her family engulfed her into their embrace. "I love you."

"We love you, too," Maisie told her as they pulled away. She took Prim's face in her hands. "Prim, you don't have to bring everything that happened with you. You can start new."

"What do you mean?" Prim asked.

"I lied to Peeta," her foster mother confessed. "I didn't tell him anything that happened to you."

"Why not?" she said in a panicked voice.

"Because it is your story to tell, baby," Maisie told her. "And, it doesn't have to follow you around. It doesn't make you the wonderful person that we know and love. Let him see all those things first—become a family. One day, you will know when to tell him."

After a moment, Prim nodded in acceptance.

Grabbing her bag, she gave her family a final smile before turning towards the unknown.

* * *

><p>Gosh, do I have many notes? I'm exhausted because this chapter has been two days of life.<p>

First off, _Capitol, Virginia_ is a figment of my imagination. Places of the same name are purely coincidental.

You might've have noticed that Effie says that Prim was named after her mother. However seeing as she was three at the time of the conversation, this is a bit of a lost memory for Prim that she's recalling. Also, don't be surprised if Prim and Peeta's father lied to the Cranes.

Also, you might've also noticed that Prim's sense of time is a little skewed—and it has a lot to do with the trauma that she's gone through. She also gets lost in her head quite a lot, another side effect.

I have a lot more to say, but I'm a bit mushed up.

Hopefully, this hasn't wrecked your brain or your heart.

Songs: 'Party Rock Anthem'-LMFAO

Next, Chapter Ten: The Realization

-JLaLa


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